Her Commanding Voice

I was heading home on a Friday, riding the commuter train back out to the suburbs when I noticed him.

Two subways to the outer reaches of the city, and he'd been on the first one and next to me on the second.

He was somewhat handsome, a regular middle aged white dude in a polo and khakis with a messenger bag and ear buds. We had made eye contact on the first train, which is probably why he felt it okay to rub his hard cock against me on the second.

Yeah. He did that.

Packed to the rafters, this guy must have pushed and wiggled his way through the crowd to get to me. And it was that same crowd that gave him the cover to nestle his crotch into the small of my back and rock back and forth.

It was violating for sure, humiliating, and sent a shudder up my spine. Even worse was the flicker of enjoyment it created between my legs.

I was a newly divorced 32 year old woman, having been kept untouched for nearly two years. Now free of the oppressive dead weight, I'd felt lost in the dating world and buried myself in work and my new house as a distraction. So it was with incredible shame and self loathing that I took this strangers abuse as a perverse pleasure.

I'd gotten off the subway system and rushed to my train, relieved to find an empty car. We were in motion when I spotted the man from the subway walk up the stairs and take a seat facing me five rows ahead. There was a brief glance in my direction before he looked longingly out the window.

All I could do, in my fear and rage, was stare down at the crinkled bulge in his lap and remember what it felt like against my back.

In an instant I'd picked up my purse and bag and dashed to the seat across from him, throwing everything down on the ground and startling him. His eyes widened as he removed an ear bud, unsure of what he'll I was about to unleash on him. Instead of an accusatory barrage of insults, I said the first thing that came to mind.

"Take it out for me,"

We sat locked in conflict and looking equally shocked. He was taken aback and begged my pardon, so I doubled down and leaned forward.

"You made me feel it, so now I want to see it. Pull out your cock,"

Our eyes shifted to his crotch and I have to say, at that moment I felt a change in me. I was no longer bluffing. I really did want him to unzip and show himself to me. It had been so long since I'd seen one in person, and while I couldn't have imagined these circumstances, I salivated at the opportunity feast my eyes on a strangers penis.

Alas, that would not be happening tonight. The man acted all flabbergasted and pulled his bag up under his arm, mumbling about how I was a crazy bitch as he ran for the exit. I allowed myself a grin as the countryside zoomed by, proud of myself for taking back my space and calling out a pervert.

And yet...

Weeks later I was beginning my summer staycation, planning on crossing off all the things on my to do list with the new house, making calls, writing cheques and scheduling any number of random specialists and contractors.

"Another busy day at the casa I see," my neighbour Susan smiled at me from her front step while tying her running shoes. "You know, you shouldn't be paying those landscapers to mow your lawn, just leave your back gate open and Jason will gladly do it for you,"

Susan and Jason were a nice enough couple, her a school teacher and him an HVAC technician- but if h was being honest I kinda hated her. It wasn't the fact she was pretty and fit, but moreso that she was my age and achieving the life of once dreamt of. House and husband in the burbs with family on the horizon. Yeah, I admit to petty jealousies.

"Anyhow, we'll see you tonight then? It's totally casual, don't need to bring a thing, we've got it all," with a smile and eye crinkle Susan bounced down the street. Even I marvelled at that pert ass as it disappeared over the horizon. Sigh. She really did have it all.

Knowing I'd be forced to socialize at one of Susan's BBQ parties and have my nose rubbed in her life, I was sour for the rest of the day. Plumbers had taken apart my downstairs powder room and the landscapers were being far too noisy for me to get any work done. So after dumping my laundry at the foot of my bed I buried myself under the covers and took a nap.

The sound that woke me was a flush, and I pulled the duvet down to my nose as I tried to reacquaint myself to my surroundings. Wait, who was in my bathroom?

I heard the light switch and the door unlock as I watched Nathan, one of the younger landscapers step out of my en suite. Tall and skinny with a mop of silky black hair, Nathan was finely muscled if not still hanging into his teenaged awkwardness. He wore the hint of a bad moustache and had dark patches of fur that stuck out from under his arms. I watched the sweaty kid slowly walk by and get focussed on the pile of clothes on my bed. He stopped to reach into the bundle and I watched him lift a pair of my panties to his face.

"What the fuck?!" My sharp words snapped Nathan out of his trance as he yelped and jumped back a couple feet. I pulled the rest of the blanket down to reveal myself, watching the younger man tremble in fear. He realized he'd still had my panties in hand, and threw them at the bed. My anger dissipated as I studied his fearful face. I could tell he didn't know whether to run or break down.

Getting up from the bed, I slowly bent over to pick up my discarded panties and walked over to Nathan. Up close it was even more apparent that he had a baby face and a bad attempt at a moustache. He smelled and looked dirty, and inches away from one another I began to feel that little tummy flutter. He knew he'd done wrong and was at my mercy.

"Take it out for me,"

Nathan's eyes danced across my face, trying desperately to read me and understand what I'd just said. So I decided to clarify it for him.

"You touched my intimate things, so now you owe me. I want you to pull out your cock and show it to me.

"They told me I could use the bathroom, I didn't know you were up here, I'm sor-"

"Nathan - I don't care. You've seen mine..." I held the panties up beside my face, pleased he would now associate the two together. "...so you show me yours,"

We held our standoff for a few minutes, waiting for the other to react. To my credit, even as I was realizing how risky this was, I remained stone faced and resolved.

"And, and, uh- you won't tell anyone about-" his voice was quiet and husky. I started to see perspiration form on the sparse hairs above his lip. He reminded me of my first boyfriend.

I looked him in the eye and nodded. He nodded back and I began to hear the clinking of his belt.

I'd inadvertently pushed Nathan against my dresser, which allowed him to undo his pants without having them fall to the floor. I stared down at the grimy waistband of his tightly whities, thinking about how this college dropout still had his mom buying his gitch. Old enough to fiddle with my panties, but too young to buy his own.

He stretched out the elastic to let me look, and I shot him a dissatisfied glare. He then hooked his thumbs into the fabric and pushed them below his hairy ballsack. His cock was long and pale with the head just peeking out of the foreskin. I stepped back and waved him to follow, opting to take a seat on the edge of the bed. His pants pooled around his ankles causing him to shuffle forward. Without instruction he took his dick in hand and retracted the foreskin to reveal his veiny monster. It grew large and throbbed, causing a dampness between my legs to form. He gripped his member and squeezed it for my perusal, slowly beginning to wank as he stepped closer to my face.

Inches away, I watched as Nathan used his foreskin as a sleeve, gathering the precum that had formed on the tip as a lube and pathetically whining as he jerked off. The wet sloppy sounds made my mouth water and I contemplated jamming his cock in my mouth and draining the kid, just as a sharp bellow could be heard downstairs.

"OY, NATE! Quit fucking around you've got shit to do," Nathan scrambled to stuff his erection back in his briefs and pull up his pants. I was startled too, and jumped up to pace while shooing him out the door. My face reddened as I questioned myself for going all horny like that. I knew I was so sexually frustrated, but the idea I was going to take advantage of the gardener boy. Yikes.

I hid in my bedroom waiting for everyone to leave, opting to talk to the plumber through the door and just texting Nathan's boss for payment. I watched him pack up the truck from my window, not even bothering to look back at the house. But I did notice that when I was putting my laundry away, those panties were no longer there.

Nonetheless, I had to put my scattered mind back together to get ready for the neighbours BBQ tonight. I grabbed a blue sundress out of the closet and hung it in the bathroom to steam while I showered. After washing my hair, I found myself lingering while soaping my nether regions. I bit my lip and let my index finger slip between my labia while thinking about Nathan. I imagined what it would have been like if I let him fuck me, pretending my finger was his cock. With my other hand I rolled long circles around my clit while dreaming about his bony young body pounding into my cunt with immature abandon.

No, no, no. I couldn't. That was just weird. Granted, no less weird than making him jerk off in front of me but hey, a girl has to draw the line somewhere right? I rinsed off and got out of the shower, intent on making myself a drink before I headed next door.

I spent a considerable amount of time doing my hair and putting on makeup. Choosing a similar pair of panties to the ones Nathan took home, and opting for no bra. Was I consciously intending to get laid tonight? No. But was I subconsciously desiring it in an increasingly desperate fashion? I won't answer that.

In any case, I could hear the noise next door as I looked for my flats, the party now starting in earnest. I glued on my happy face, grabbed a chilled bottle of white and headed next door.

The next three hours went well, with many a soft bellied thirty something dad type ogling my tits while I giggled and preened for their attention. Most of the desirable ones were married (oh they looked too) but I kept my eyes peeled for anyone to take home at the end of the night. Jason and Susan were wonderful hosts, flitting about keeping things light. Jason, a barrel chested blonde with receding hairline and faded tattoos kept everyone's cup full and politely flirted with me whenever I looked bored. He also saved his inebriated wife from causing a scene when she got too sloppy, taking her upstairs and putting her to bed. At one point he went to pass by me and had his hand on my lower hip, eliciting a quick moan while he nudged by. The brief spark gave me a renewed interest in finding a fuck buddy and I scanned the yard looking for fresh meat.

Unfortunately, the party began to wind down, and I knew I'd be going to bed alone again. I tried to say goodbye to the host, as to not be rude, but he was busy seeing off the last two single guests out front so I curled up on a patio chair and waited for his return.

When he did, Jason looked surprised to still see me there, and offered me the last beer as he staggered over to sit. He was able to hold his liquor better than Susan, but he was clearly well lubricated, having enjoyed the night. He sat back in the creaking plastic chair, his sturdy belly looking ever more prominent atop his big hairy thighs.

"Have a good time tonight?" He took a swig if the beer and set the dripping bottle on the table.

"Yeah it was great, thanks so much for having me," I gave a faint grin that failed to convince him of anything, and repositioned my feet under my bum.

"You seemed pretty interested in Mario, eh? He could do worse Y'know," I laughed uncomfortably. For the next little while we gossiped about the folks at the party, talked shit about the neighbours and just had a good quiet chat to wrap up the night. As my mind lingered on my disappointment, I began to notice that Jason's hooded eyes seemed squarely fixated on my cleavage. Returning the favour I couldn't help but notice the front of his shorts had filled out in a noticeable fashion.

Caught between feelings of sadness for Susan, guilt for enjoying the attention, and the hormonal instinct that raged in my belly, I took a deep breath and stared longingly at Jason's crotch. He rubbed his hand against the mound in a way he could argue intent, then squeezed it for me when I didn't speak out. With Susan snoring upstairs in bed, I bit my lip and said those words once more.

"Take it out for me"

Without any elegance or grace, my drunk neighbour unbuckled his shorts and pulled the zipper down. The bulge in his tiny blue briefs was remarkable, and begged for my attention. He lifted his ass and tore it all off, clumsily kicking his clothes onto the lawn. While I was mesmerized by his massive penis, Jason went a step further and pulled off his shirt. His chest was broad and flat, his entire front covered in a dense blonde curl that extended to his furry balls. Maybe it was all the pent up sexual frustrations, but here I was sat across from a real man in all his naked glory.

I was thrown by Jason's boldness; here he was acting so brash and dominant but at my command. I'd had no idea what I was dealing with but I was loving every second of it.

Jason slid down in his chair while folding his arms behind his head. The move made me want to bury my face in those armpits and inhale. But again here he was making him self so prone yet controlling. He wiggled his hips so his cock waved at me while his ample belly jiggled about. I fought the urge to fall to my knees and worship his meat, instead leaned forward to inspect the bulbous purple head and thick veiny shaft. I took a moment to consider the ruinous damage that beast must cause Susan and her petite body as I compared it to my wrist.

If he were less stocky that erection could have dwarfed Jason, but gazing over his entire body once more just gave me an appreciation for how large he was. My ex husband was average in every way, but my naked neighbour made me fantasize about his one day being engulfed by a thick man. Obviously it couldn't be Jason though, I had to hold SOME restraint and couldn't do that to Susan.

I could watch though.

"Touch it for me," I purred. Jason leant forward and I whispered it again. He scraped his chair against the deck as he inched up closer and lay his meat in the palm of his hand. He crudely spat and began to rub himself, pausing to look me in the eye with silent instruction. I rolled my feet to the ground and leaned in. Without breaking eye contact, I gathered up as much saliva as I could and dribbled it out into a long string that fell to his shaft.

Jason took long slow strokes as he covered his dick in my spit, and I savoured the sounds of this sloppy mess as I was mesmerized by the movement. His eyes went to my chest, so I slipped the straps from my shoulders and gave him full view of my breasts. I continued to watch him pull his cock as we both leaned back in our chairs. With my legs now open, I pulled up my sundress and traced my finger along the elastic of the leg hole. Having teased him enough, I then pulled the crotch aside and began to pull and plump my labia for display. Jason's face reddened as he locked his eyes on my cunt and began to speed his handiwork. Slowly he slipped off the chair and fell to his knees. He grunted as he brought himself to face level with my pussy and for the first time I was scared of what he would do next. I started to fuck myself with two fingers while mashing away at my clit watching as Jason threw his chest back and with mouth agape shot wildly into the air. A long gob of cum landed on my dress and tan down my leg, with successive volleys finding the deck boards and Jason's leg.

I furiously tried to get myself off while Jason lay on the ground in a mess of his own making. I could begin to see a realization cross his face and went to cover myself up. The moment had passed and now reality was coming back to the fore. I grabbed a napkin as Jason stood and bumbled about gathering his clothes from the lawn. If there was anything more jarring to the angry yearning between my legs, it was watching a middle aged man balancing on one leg trying to get back into his jockeys. It was endearing, but far from the lusty sights I'd just seen.

I wiped his cum of my leg with a napkin, stuffed my tits back into my dress and quietly said goodbye as Jason sheepishly nodded. He seemed as though he was about to say something, but realized that our mutual silence was assured and just let me slip out of the yard.

I got home and tore off my dress, pulling a purple vibrator from my nightstand and proceeding to fuck myself in every possible position. I lay straight with my legs closed forcing the dildo against my clit, imagining the man on the train forcing himself on me. I aimed it upward and fucked myself with it, thinking about how I would have ridden Nathan's skinny body. And I rubbed it across my mound while on all fours, dreaming of a man like Jason railing me from behind. Finally, I came while laid on a pillow, thrusting the vibrator in and out and lavishing in the thought I could make men this fucking wild and beholden. I could be the one I needed, and give myself everything I required.

If I'm being honest though, what really sent me over the edge was holding my soiled sundress to my face so I could lick and smell and taste Jason's cum.

So maybe I needed ONE thing other than myself.

Epilogue

I tried to take it easy and allow myself more time and space to recover from the divorce. I found other hobby's that lessened the importance of my job and let me try and discover who I was. The house repairs finally finished up and I was living a life that I enjoyed without guilt.

And every Sunday morning, when Susan went out for a jog, Jason would come through my back gate, leave his mower in the yard and find his way to the foot of my bed. There he would strip completely naked and jerk off for me while I played with my cunt. I never again had to ask him to "take it out" for me.