Chapter 5 (of 7) -- Danny and his former school pals debate their predicament.
Chief Stewardess Julie Davies, of the popular travel company Sunshine Holidays, based at Manchester Airport -- Terminal 2, led the way along a corridor at a brisk, business-like pace, with Danny Dawson and his three fellow Air Purification Technicians -- his former school pals -- following closely at her heels.
A minute or so later, Chief Stewardess Julie Davies halted, and she pointed to one of two white-painted doors -- the one that bore the sign: Gentlemen. "Toilets," the senior air hostess said succinctly. "It's a three-hour flight, to Corfu, and you won't be able to go to the loo in-flight. Be quick -- I want you all in and out of there, in double-quick time. I'll wait here for you. Now hurry up, the lot of you!"
Once they were in the privacy of the Gents' toilets, the four former classmates -- all of them, eighteen-year-old school leavers with no employment or training to go to upon their leaving education and, would-be 'career claimants' -- then had their first chance to talk to each other freely, about the mysterious, seemingly unfathomable circumstances in which they had all found themselves.
"Ruddy ... 'Air Purification Technicians'? Some joker at the Job Centre's having a ruddy good laugh, aren't they?" suggested Kelvin Costello, not unreasonably.
"Must be!" Eric Pierce agreed feelingly. "There's no other explanation!" he opined with conviction. Eric added, cynically, "It would be just like them!"
"What do you think, Danny?" asked Alan Wallace. His dubious tone, clearly suggesting that there must be more to their situation than met the eye -- ruddy hell! Nothing did, meet the eye!
"I dunno, Al," replied Danny, just as clueless as his peers. "Your guess is as good as mine. I can't make any sense of it. I mean, you'd think that you'd need some kind of qualifications, wouldn't you, to be anβ"
There was a loud knocking on the Gents' toilets door, and the adjuring tones of Chief Stewardess Julie Davies harassed the four former school chums, interrupting their impromptu confab regarding the puzzling question at hand. "Hey! You lot! What's keeping you? I said: Hurry! Up!!" shouted the senior air hostess, loudly and impatiently.
"It's still not too late to do a runner," suggested Kelvin. "I'm absolutely knackered. Oh, man, I'd love to go back to bed!"
"I feel like death warmed up too, Kel," replied Eric. "But what's the point of doing a runner? Eh? Our unemployment benefit payments would be stopped straight away. I mean, what would we do for money then?"
"I keep thinking this is all just some big mess-up," said Alan. "You know; some imbecile down at the Job Centre has picked up the wrong folder by mistake, pulled our names out of it, andβ"
"If only!" blurted Danny, interrupting Alan in mid-flow. "My mum says there's no chance of all this being a mistake. It's all to do with the Authoritarian Female Party -- they are the ones behind these ruddy so-called 'placements'. My dad has been taken off Disability Allowance, and he's reporting to the Community Service liaison officer this morning -- a Miss Martinette. My mum says there will be big changes now, with women running the country. Women like Caroline Flint, and Harriet Harmman. They are putting their foot down, on people like us, people who ... whoβ"
There was a tremendous thudding upon the Gents' door, as Chief Stewardess Julie Davies banged an irate fist against it.
Upon hearing the sounds of hushed conversation coming from inside the Gents', the senior air hostess pressed her ear against the door, in trying to make out the gist of what her four nattering charges were saying to each other -- just in time to catch Danny saying: "It's all to do with the Authoritarian Female Party -- they are the ones behind these ruddy so-called 'placements' ..."
"You lot! Out of there! Now! This instant!!" the senior air hostess yelled furiously. And Danny and his three former schoolmates sheepishly exited the Gents', having got no further forward in shedding any sort of light upon the perplexing mystery.