As I sat in my car dressed in jeans and a polo shirt, I felt extreme butterflies in my stomach. I had parked on the street a few houses away from my destination. Underneath my male clothing I was wearing a pink bra and lace trimmed pink nylon full cut granny panties. In a paper bag I had the other items I was told to bring.
It had been ten minutes since I parked the car. I was trying to get up the nerve to meet the man I had connected with through an online alternative lifestyle hook-up site.
This wasn't going to be an ordinary meeting. I knew that once I walked into Master Mark's house there would be no turning back.
Only two weeks had passed since I committed to meet with Master Mark. As I mentally prepared for what I was about to do, the thought of how this came about flashed through my mind. Six months earlier I considered myself to be completely heterosexual.
My name is Dan. I've been divorced for four years and recently turned forty. After being involved in an on again off again relationship for three of those years I ended it. The relationship never felt right and I wanted some time to find himself.
Throughout most of my life I've had a fetish for wearing panties. It began during my teens when I first put on a pair of my mom's underpants. The moment I pulled them on I got an instant boner. As I looked at myself in the mirror, I got so aroused that I uncontrollably cum inside them without touching myself.
From that day on, I couldn't resist putting on either my mom or sister's panties and masturbating in them. After getting married, I did the same while wearing my wife's panties.
My infatuation with wearing panties was so intense that I enjoyed masturbating in them more than having sex. It made an easy transition from marriage and my subsequent relationship to being single. As long as I had a pair of panties to wear and my hand, my sexual gratification was never ending.
Being single and with no responsibilities to anyone but myself, I was masturbating more often than ever before. I began buying my own panties which I found to be extremely arousing. It excited me to think that the female clerks doing the ring-out of my purchase knew that I was buying them for masturbatory pleasure.
Within a few months of being on my own, I started wearing panties all the time. It excited me to be at work or in public, secretly wearing women's underpants.
My obsession for masturbating in my panties was fueled even more by my obsession with pornography. I spent hours each day online viewing porn, playing with my cock, and creaming in my panties. It was a pleasure I never tired of.
While my porn obsession had always been very vanilla, it changed dramatically after a conversation I had with a woman in an online chatroom. After admitting my panty wearing fetish to her, she questioned me on whether I ever had sexual desires or fantasies involving other men?
Even though I hadn't, the woman suggested some websites and videos she thought I would enjoy. She asked me to return to the chatroom the next week to let her know my thoughts.
After our chat, I went to one of the websites to watch a video titled "A Panty Wearing Sissy Learns His Place."
I was certain that I wouldn't get aroused but two minutes into the video my cock was getting hard. I suddenly couldn't resist from rubbing it through my panty.
When the panty wearing sissy was instructed to get down on his knees in front of a man stroking his cock, I could hardly contain my excitement. My cock was as hard as it could be.
It didn't take long before I had my excited penis out and stroking it as I watched the panty wearing sissy with a cock in his mouth. Within seconds he was instructed to "swallow" and I instantly blew a load of thick white cum all over my belly.
After ejaculating I was filled with guilt for getting turned on by watching a sexual encounter between two men. I thought it would be a one time event but by the next night I was getting turned on again watching similar videos.
My curiosity was piqued. I began wondering what it was like to have a cock in my mouth and filling it with cum. I tried to get in a position for oral self gratification but was not limber enough or endowed enough to do it.
I then did what seemed to be the next best thing. After putting my legs up over my head, I masturbated until I shot cum into my open waiting mouth.
It was no surprise to the woman in the chatroom the following week when I reported to her what I had done. She was confident in predicting my fate.
"I'd bet a million dollars that one of these days you're going to be on your knees with a cock in your mouth."
At the time I didn't think that would happen but there was no doubt my life had changed. The porn that I started watching was more male oriented. I got aroused watching men masturbate. I got even more aroused watching dominant men using a panty wearing submissive for sexual gratification.
I soon found myself fantasizing of doing the things I was watching in videos. I bought bras, garters, stockings, pantyhose, and panty girdles to wear while acting out my fantasies. I also bought cock shaped dildos that I sucked and rode while I masturbated as I imagined being used by a man.
As I became more obsessed with my fantasy of being a panty wearing sissy I bought wigs and make-up. I shaved the hair from my pubic area and butt. I was doing everything I could to live out my sissy fantasy and masturbating constantly imagining the pleasure I would get from it.
Three months passed after my online chat. I had wanted to find myself when I ended my last relationship and in a strange way, it seemed that I had.
The one curiosity that remained was the one I had from the very start. I wondered what it was like to have a man's penis ejaculate in my mouth and be made to swallow his cum.
Nearly all women knew what that experience was like and I wanted to know too. Since I hadn't been able to suck my own cock I knew there was only one way to find out.
I couldn't believe I actually wanted to suck a man's cock or was even considering doing it. I wasn't sure how to go about fulfilling that desire but ultimately decided to try posting an ad on an alternative lifestyle website.
My post was simple. I described myself physically and said that I was a submissive who wore panties daily. I was seeking domination and humiliation from a man. My desire was to be used in any way for his sexual pleasure.
Prior to clicking on "post now" I hesitated for a moment but then told myself "I'm just going to do this for fun to see if anyone will respond. Just because I post an ad doesn't mean that I really have to do it."
It took less than a day to get responses. Master Mark lived within an hour drive from my home and his response immediately got me aroused.
"I know your type well. You wear panties and play with yourself as you fantasize about having a man make you suck his cock. I enjoy making a panty wearing sissy blush and squirm as I make him beg to pleasure my thick eight inch penis. Only respond to me If you are serious about your desire as you WILL be made to suck and yes, YOU WILL SWALLOW my hot creamy load of sperm. You also will do much much more and will truly know what it's like to serve a man."
I read the response over and over a number of times. My cock was hard and I was rubbing it as I read the words. The response scared me although I wasn't sure why? This was what I wanted, or at least it's what I had thought.
A few hours passed and I still wasn't sure if I should respond. I got online and started watching sissy porn. It was the only stimulation I needed to make my decision. I responded to Master Mark that I was serious about my desire.
From the moment I sent my response I felt nervous. I got even more nervous when i received my next communication from Master Mark
"I am very pleased by your response sissy. To prove you are truly committed send me two pictures of yourself. Wear a bra and panties in both. In the first one your panty will be pulled up. In the second one it will be pulled down exposing your excited clitty. In both, you will show your face and in both you will be holding a sign that reads 'I want to suck Master Mark's cock.' Send the pictures within twenty-four hours."