-Sep 27-
What a strange life I now live. What a strange marriage.
Hubby, such a wonderful man, meets all my needs.
Emotional attentive, check. Intelligent listener, check.
He is an amazing father and steady provider.
Our house is peaceful, fun and always alive.
He's a sweet lover, though he lacks some confidence.
Yet, his confidence shows in the freedom he gives.
He has fearlessly let me wander into a wild sex life apart from him.
I've learned a new level of sexual pleasure.
I've met a freak side of myself I never knew existed.
It seems absurd, but I realize where that absurdity comes from.
Social norms built an understanding in me of how things must be,
but this life has upended that understanding.
If I'm being honest, this is a better reality.
I can honestly say our marriage has never been better.
I can't understand how, but it's true.
Boyfriend wondered today if I'd ever leave hubby,
since I've found such better sex elsewhere.
I laughed loudly at him and called him stupid.
"You're a great bull. Don't be dumb as an ox."
"Why the hell would I leave? Life is not all hot sex and big dicks."
"Hubby allows me to have everything I could possibly want."
"He never complains. He never feels jealous or threatened."
"He makes me happy far more often than your cock does."
"Why would I leave that?"
I realized then that so many people could never understand.
It's all just too contrary to the realities they believe. That's fine.
I'm loving the crazy life I have, no matter how crazy it may be.
-Oct 1-
I was stuck at home, with work stuff to do.
Hubby was home too, putting kids to bed.
Boyfriend was stuck in Ohio, flight delayed for snow.
Busy in my home office, I was suddenly horny for him;
writhing for that perfect cock and wonderful touch.
I tried to put it out of mind, but failed.
My slit had been juicing for an hour.
I knew hubby couldn't satisfy what I felt.
His tongue is nice, but it's just a tongue.
His dick is fine, but it wasn't really what I was pining for.
Instead, I sent him to the store for wine.
He's like the rich Russian in, "The Sun Also Rises"...
...I knew I'd have plenty of alone time.
Kids asleep, bedroom door locked, I fell onto our bed.
Self-touch and dreaming were somewhat satisfying,
but, I wanted boyfriend and his long, thick cock.
My toy could help, I thought, and got it out.
I'll make a video, I decided, to send to Ohio.
I took my time and recorded every minute.
I looked in the camera and said his name.
I let him see my pussy getting opened and stretched.
I said it was good, but not as good as him.
I finally came; long and intense.
My sounds were exaggerated, and the camera focus perfect.
A smile and a kiss, then a long time rubbing myself calm.
I sent the video and got back to work in the office.
Hubby arrived and we drank wine; work stuff done.
I kept quiet about the self-love and the video.
But I did let him take me, when the wine was gone.
He did me in all the ways he loves.
I enjoyed pleasing him, having already pleased myself.
Still, the morning brought some guilt, so I fessed up.
I offered to show him what I'd sent.
He caressed my hip, "Not needed and no apologies".
"We had our own fun. And with good wine".
"I had you warm and in-person. He had a blizzard".
"Just a phone screen in an airport, so, I think I won."
"Seriously? You're not jealous or mad?"
"You can do what you want with your boy toy."
"He's not a toy to me." I paused. "I feel..."
"He's not a toy, true. I take that back. He's also not here for life."
Hubby put his arms tightly around me.
"I am. If it all goes south, you'll always have me."
In that moment, something washed over me.
I felt things I've only ever felt with hubby.
Boyfriend goes deep, but not this deep.
I held him tightly and felt tears welling up.
The difference between love and romance was made starkly clear.
-Oct 20-
Hubby needed a happy hour with his buddy.
He'd had a rough day and needed some laughs.
I told him to go have fun as I was texting boyfriend.
An hour later, I was filled up with cock. So full.
Hubby kept interrupting us with texts.
I finally got pissed and texted him to hurry up.
It was an accidental text, boyfriend had me edging.
I was tense about needing to climax,
and I just wanted hubby to just finish texting,
He misinterpreted and was now on the way.
Boyfriend waited to the last minute to let me arrive.
Hubby walked through the door two minutes later, unaware.
I didn't want to tell him, so I didn't.
But, I accidentally spread my legs in bed.
He was walking by the bedroom door.
I know he saw the damp streak on my panties.
The light pink was a darker pink where I was leaking.
He looked again to be sure. I know he saw, but he walked away.
As he left the room, I went to touching myself, still horny.
He came back and I was under the covers, still touching myself.
That dumbass just fell asleep! Did he not want me?
He's mentioned enjoying seconds before.
Maybe, he didn't realize boyfriend had come over.
Maybe, he was just tired from the beer or a long day.
Maybe, getting under the covers had sent the wrong message.
I was confused but couldn't help rubbing myself.
It felt good, even through cum-soaked panty fabric,
and holy shit, before I knew it, I was enjoying a great clitoral orgasm.
He just slept through it. Whatever, his loss.
I finally pulled the wet panties off
and left them lost somewhere under the covers.
I slept for a long time the next morning.
Then he sent me a photo from the bathroom.
He'd unleashed a huge cumload onto those pink panties.
I just shook my head. My hubby makes no sense sometimes.
-Nov 5-
Middle of the night texting, boyfriend was crazy horny.
He wanted to come over and fuck.
I was nervous cause hubby had been distant lately.
Finally, I told him okay, as hubby slept.
Boyfriend met me in the garage.
We were in my car, in the light of hubby's workbench.
Boyfriend had his thick Buick parked painfully in my ass.
I'm not big on anal, but allow it occasionally.