A conversation between a wife and husband about a date she made with a male friend.
W=wife
H=husband
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H: I wanted you this morning.
W: I could feel that, Mister Handsalloverme.
H: I heard your alarm go off. I knew you were awake. I figured you were waiting for me to ravish you....
W: That's an assumption you've made since I first let you sleep next to me.
H: I know. You body calls my cock to action.
W: And your hands get busy.
H: It's a natural instinct. You're my wife.
W: That's dear.
H: It is. I like being dear to you. It helps me get inside you.
W: Not when I'm still asleep. I could care less about your dearness then.
H: Awe...are you sure?
W: I'm sure. I like your desire. But you don't get a free pass to my body. I have a say when and if we have sex.
H: You haven't seemed that interested. Is there something going on?
W: I'm not interested in sex when I'm asleep. Make sense?
H: Yes.
W: I think we need a rule since you like rules that you don't touch my nipples, breast or pussy without asking.
H: That'll kill the mood.
W: Darling, I'm not in the mood when you wake me up pulling my nipple. You need to wait until I'm awake and then ask. .. "May I touch you..."
H: But that kills the mood.
W: Not my mood. It might help get me in the mood.
H: I don't see that. How?
W: Because your desire can be a turn on, sometimes. So asking if you can touch me is a little aphrodisiac.
H: But asking kills the spontaneity. I think my fingers, my touch would get you going towards wanting to have sex.
W: Yes, sometimes. But from now on I want you to ask.
H: Well, I wanted you this morning. I was standing straight up for you.
W: I think your cock knows things before you know them.
H: What do you mean?
W: I think your cock knows I've been meaning to tell you something.
H: There's another man sniffing around?
W: Come here. Stand in from of me.
H: Okay.
W: Undo your pants and pull them down. And your underwear.
H: Why?
W: Hah. See. Just do what I say.
H: You want to do a scene?
W: No, no scene. Not anymore than you putting your hand between my legs in the morning.
H: Okay.
W: Take your underwear off. I should make you wear panties. Put your hands behind your back.
H: What's going on?
W: You'll see. This is a test to prove something.
H: Prove what?
W: Try not to be so... stop asking questions.
H: Sorry.
W: Of course. I have something to tell you and I think I know exactly how you'll react. Listen to me.
H: Yes.
W: I've met another man.
H: A bull?