Chapter 1
So much has happened in our house and in our lives since my wife Tammy decided to take a lover after a series of long and emotionally draining months which marked the second year of our wedding anniversary. Truth be told, it was a decision made by the both of us. The impetus for this dramatic change in our lives was sexual in nature. I was born woefully under endowed with minimal to no staying power resulting in the embarrassing experience of premature ejaculation along with any woman I had ever been with informing me they could never feel me inside them. We are born with what we are born with and can't bring more to the table physically than what was bestowed upon us at birth.
Tammy had made no bones about her sexual dissatisfaction with me since our first coupling. She is a Rubenesque, BBW, with long brown hair and hazel eyes, wide hips, a big, beautiful ass, 44DD breasts, a figure which men's eyes followed whenever she walked by them. Overtly sexual and flirtatious in contrast to my meekness and natural shyness,
Tammy would have a bevy of men surrounding her two seconds after she entered a room. Plus, she always dressed very sexy in tight fitting spandex dresses, or blouses which showed off her ample cleavage, but whatever she wore it always left little to the imagination. After I proposed marriage she honestly said she didn't know if she could be married to me when I didn't sexually satisfy her fully. This after having dated a bevy of black and well-hung men in her day. I promised to do all I could with my mouth, fingers, toys and whatever it took to make her satisfied. Well, that didn't last long and by our second year we were in a bad place sexually and emotionally. We spent hours in a marriage counselors office, and it was at her suggestion of Tammy taking on a lover that things took a much unexpected turn in our marriage and relationship.
There is no doubt we love each other and we both wanted desperately to save our marriage. We initially had set up some ground rules to her taking a lover such as I would always know when they would be together, they would meet at our house so I could be present, and their couplings would be at Tammy's discretion. I was scared to death as we walked into this unknown territory, like a frightened lamb being led off to slaughter, shivering and shaking. Tammy on the other hand began to exude a new heightened sense of authority, sexuality, and dominance I had never known her to possess. As a cuckold, I began to assume a much more submissive and subservient role. All this took place BEFORE she had chosen her lover. That process proved to come easily. Tammy wanted several things in a lover, they must be single, well-hung, clean, monogamous, and someone she could like and get along with. I was alarmed with the monogamous criteria, but Tammy explained it was important to her to have unprotected sex with the man she chose to be her lover. I was taken aback by this, and I have to admit it hurt me and excited me at the same time.
Online ads and swinger sites proved full of crazy people and we met with a few and none passed her muster. And then one night over dinner she told me she thought she had identified a perfect suitable candidate. Larry was a guy she'd grown up with who was a friend of her younger brother. I'm fifty and Tammy is forty and Larry is thirty-five. I had never met him, but she talked quite a bit about him during our dating days and marriage. I had seen several pictures of the three of them growing up at different stages in their lives, the last one was a picture taken about five years ago at a backyard picnic. Tammy wore Daisy Duke shorts, cowboy boots, and a tube top with no bra, Larry stood, arms around Tammy's shoulder, he was very tall and lean with close cropped hair, chiseled features and a handsome face. Larry and her brother had a falling out and Tammy took Larry's side, and her brother moved away and hasn't spoken to Tammy or Larry since. There was an uneasiness in my stomach when she brought him up I couldn't quite put my finger on.
"He's quite perfect you know," Tammy said, a gleam in her eye and a smirk on her face.
"If you say so, but I should like to meet him before you two jump in bed together," I said, a bit sarcastically.
"Oh don't be such a fuddy dud! Larry and I practically grew up together. That's what makes him the perfect candidate. He's known me all my life, and I think he's always sort of had a crush on me, plus when he and my brother were in school together, the guys crowned him 'the human tripod' because they said his cock was so big in the shower!" She laughed and drank her wine.
"I suppose, it's just, well it's just that all this is a bit unsettling to me. I know the issues we are having, but it's not easy for me to just give you over to some hunk for his pleasure."
"You know, you sound like a petulant little child! What about my pleasure? You certainly can't pleasure me, and we've already established that fact. How do you think I feel when all my friends go on and on about the wild sexual exploits with their husbands for hours at a time and I'm stuck with a dud who goes two pumps and a squirt and then is done? You're being way too selfish here! This is NOT about you! This is about ME! This is about you not being able to please me sexually and me having to find someone who can? How do you think that makes me feel?" She downed her wine and stormed off into the other room.
I meekly donned the apron which hung on the kitchen cabinet and began cleaning the dinner dishes. I fought back the tears as my heart sank. Tammy was a master as always twisting and turning things around, so she somehow came out to be the victim. I was always relegated to be the one at fault. I accepted it because in a sense it was true, I was the one at fault. One cannot help what equipment you're born with, and at the same time, it drove me wild to think of her in another man's arms. I finished the dishes, swept the floor, emptied the garbage and went to find Tammy hoping she'd cooled off. She lay on our king size bed simultaneously watching tv and scrolling through her phone. She wore only a sheer white robe. I sat on the little stool in front of her makeup table, took a deep breath, and as I had on so many other occasions mustered up the courage to once again have another one of these difficult conversations with my wife.
"I'm sorry honey. I know you're angry with me. I'm asking you to forgive me. It's just, well, I just get so jealous when I think of this whole process starting with you and another man. I think what will happen if you fall in love with him and leave me? I think about that all the time. I guess what I'm trying to say, no, I know what I'm trying to say. What I'm trying to say is this: I love you, you're my wife and I would do ANYTHING in the world to ensure your happiness. I know I wasn't born with a big cock and great staying power, and I know I'm a bit of a wimp, but I'm a good man, a good provider, I love you with all my heart and soul and I don't want to lose you."
Tammy motioned for me to come sit by her on the side of the bed like a mother calling her son to come to her after some small transgression. I complied, knees shaking, stomach in a knot, hands trembling.