Three days into the job and things had already taken a very peculiar turn.
Eric never expected to be laying under the desk of one of the three most powerful women at the firm, let alone with her scuffed Klogs resting firmly on his chest. Liz, the junior VP, had seemed so professional in her fitted jacket and slacks. But since when was resting her feet on a colleague's chest professional?
Liz grinned as she laid out her "rules".
"Rule number one," she said in a clipped and even tone, as if she expected his ready compliance in all things. "Do what I say and exactly what I say. That's the only way this is gonna work."
Eric was nervous. He'd agreed to the arrangement but wasn't expecting it to feel so humiliating.
"Rule number two," she continued. "I expect lots of enthusiasm for everything I have you do. I don't care if you enjoy it or not, but don't let me think for a second you don't enjoy it. Which brings me to rule three. No faces. I don't care how stinky my feet are. I don't want any looks of disgust and definitely no comments. You're here to work on my feet and that's exactly what you'll do. No attitude. I hate that."
Eric was still upset with himself for agreeing to it. He'd been warned Liz had smelly feet but he assumed she only expected a foot rub. He didn't think she'd be rubbing her smelly feet in his face.
He'd been trying so hard to make a good impression at the firm that when he wasn't doing so, he was too quick to agree to this exercise in humiliation. If only this hadn't been his only employment opportunity in months, he would have got up and walked out the door. But the future was bleak, poor job performance and employment gaps giving him fewer and fewer options.
MONDAY
The job had begun well enough. His interview with Amanda, the senior VP, went surprisingly well and he'd been offered the job on the spot. They'd been expecting a woman by the name of Erica, and yet somehow it didn't matter that he was a man named Eric applying for a job at a pr firm devoted exclusively to women's causes.
Amanda was statuesque with an angular, sporty physique, likely in her forties but easily passing for younger. She would have been intimidating if she hadn't reassured him with the occasional smile.
She broke the ice by joking about the name confusion.
"If I'd looked at your resume first, I would have realized your name was Eric not Erica but my assistant has a habit of mumbling," she confided. "Granted, I might not have looked at your resume if I'd known since, as you know, this firm is devoted to issues of women's excellence and leadership and ensuring that the accomplishments of our best and brightest are used to inspire other women to greatness. I wouldn't think this was the ideal choice for someone like you, not that I'd discriminate and say no. I just wouldn't expect one of the male sex to be all that interested in women's issues."
"I'm all for it," he volunteered, though he was ready to say anything to get the job. He was keen to get working again. "Women's issues, that is. We should do more to make their accomplishments known."
"True," she answered. "If only more boys could be grown-ups about it. We're here and we're taking charge. Get used to it."
Eric smiled a response though her remarks felt more like a threat. It was odd that she referred to men as boys.
"We had a few other boys working here, though they came in as copyrighters. It was never a great fit, though it could have worked if they hadn't been so sensitive about things, as boys do. Granted, the other copywriters probably gave them a hard time, but it would have been fine if those boys manned up. If you want to keep up with us, you've got to work hard."
Eric nodded with a smile. Whatever happened to the other men, it was of no consequence. He wanted a job and he was ready to do his best.
"I'll do what I can," he said. "You do great work here and I'd love to be of service." He didn't care what they did, but he would be good at it all the same.
Amanda flashed a smile. "Service. Indeed. I'd be happy to have you serve our cause. You'd make for an exciting change around here. With almost thirty women working here, adding another woman won't give the rest of us an improved perspective on the male sex. Having you here, committed to our cause, will show them that some of you lot can do what we can. A male account exec. I think that's what we need."
Here words were almost demeaning, but the pay was too good to give it more than a moment's thought.
"How soon can you start?" she asked, to his relief and surprise. He couldn't believe his good fortune. He'd submitted his resume on a whim, not expecting a response; and yet here he was with a new job.
No sooner did he accept her offer of employment than he was taken on a tour of their spacious offices. His presence was greeted with surprised grins. Many of the women were pleasant looking, and a few of them even beautiful. He didn't feel out of place. If anything, he felt fortunate, like a sultan presiding over a harem.
His new assistant, Nicole, was a girl in her mid-twenties, soft features and wide eyes. The girl couldn't stop smiling as she accepted Eric's outstretched hand. He figured she was pleased that finally there was a man working there. It couldn't have hurt that he was what many considered handsome, and, judging from the many women he slept with, very desirable.
It was fellow account executive Dana who took him under her wing. She wasn't beautiful yet he couldn't keep from stealing glances at her shapely physique. Like many of the women there, she knew how to dress, using a blouse and skirt to showcase her body.
"I've got to admit, I'm a little surprised," she confided when they sat down to discuss the accounts he was inheriting. "You know what we do, right?"
"Women's issues," he replied, wishing he had something more to say. He still couldn't believe he had the job.
"We do what we can to advance the role of women in society," she explained, "celebrating their leadership and pushing for more women in influential corporate roles. Though you wouldn't be here if Amanda didn't think you could help us with that. She's tough and she has a way of looking at you like you were standing in front of her with your pants around your ankles, but don't let that bother you. That's just how she is."
Dana quickly made Eric feel at home, giving him the lowdown on the company and on what accounts to prioritize.
"The ones over there," she said, gesturing to some Redwelds on a desk, "aren't that critical yet. But they will be. Look at these ones first."
The files Dana gave him concerned women athletes. Sports was familiar territory for him and he was already writing down ideas for how to market their accomplishments, with a view to using them on advertising campaigns.
TUESDAY
The following day, his meeting with Amanda didn't go as well as hoped. She was disappointed that he'd already neglected the high priority accounts, the ones Dana assured him weren't important yet.
"Look, Eric," said Amanda, her gaze withering. "I know you just started but I need you to keep up. Cute boys don't get special treatment here. They pull their weight and they keep up with everyone else."
"Of course. Dana said those files weren't important."
"Typical," she answered. "Blaming a woman for what you didn't do. Come on, Eric. Man up and get on those files. We have an event to prepare for this Friday."
She turned from him, which was Eric's cue to leave her office and get busy. He grabbed the neglected files and familiarized himself with them. The files concerned business leaders, one of whom was speaking at an event later that week.
That day, he prepared some notes to discuss with Amanda. He had enough ideas to prove his worth to the firm.
WEDNESDAY
His third day, he was no longer a novelty around the office. The grins and whispers turned to curt nods of the head. He was one of them.
He was reaching for the files which contained his handwritten notes when he was surprised to find they weren't where he'd put them. He was at a loss. He looked everywhere but they'd disappeared. Someone had taken them. Was someone trying to undermine him already? He thought he was part of the team, or had it only seemed that way.
He remembered enough about his notes to wing it, but when Amanda pressed him for details, he admitted that his files had been taken.
"You mean you lost them," she answered, her voice raised. The door was open which meant her assistant Steph and others could hear her dress him down. "Two days on the job and you don't know your right from your left," she said, shaking her head. "Maybe you boys think that when you make a mistake it's no big deal. But it's a big deal here. This is important stuff. Reputations on the line. And you think you can shrug it off like we don't have to do our utmost to advance the careers of women leaders. Do you even take this seriously?"
"I do," he answered, stammering under her imperious disapproval. "I can find those files. I really will do my best. I have great ideas."
"Useless when you lose the files, Eric," she answered.
