Allegra Gets Orgasm Therapy

"I'm sorry, say that...again?"

Doctor Khatri cleared her throat and began again, uncrossing and re-crossing her legs in her low-slung Eames chair. She adjusted her black pant suit, which had gotten caught at the ankle on her grey suede boots. "After 6 months of talk therapy, we haven't yet hit the breakthrough moment that I would expect. Given that the reaction you're having seems to be related to intercourse, I think what might be most helpful is a special observational session in which we can simulate and control a scenario here in the office. I understand that may be... uncomfortable to think about, but at this point I recommend we consider this to properly diagnose what's causing the reaction."

Allegra furrowed her brow, jaw gaped and in disbelief. "I just... I mean... how would we even do that?"

"Well... we have a few options. Can I assume you've used a sex toy before?"

"I mean, yes...?" Allegra felt embarrassed and exposed at the question.

"So you can bring a certain kind of toy to our next session, or I can perhaps supply one for you."

"Okayyyyyy...so..." Allegra closed her eyes as she exhaled, "what kind of toy...?"

"We need it to be similar to the penis in shape and stimulation."

"So, a... dildo...?"

"Well a dildo would work, yes. The problem is, it seems this reaction doesn't seem to happen when you self-stimulate, am I correct about that?"

Allegra pursed her lips and nodded, looking down at her thighs, fixating on the frays in her high-waisted light wash jean shorts.

"Right, so following that fact, we need it to be non-auto stimulation. In other words, if you are doing it to yourself, it probably will not reproduce the reaction in our session. It's likely a psychosomatic reaction, but the only way to understand this is to witness your arousal stages and pinpoint when the reaction begins. Do you understand?"

Allegra laughed, but more of a nervous laugh. Her therapist was telling her she needed to have someone fuck her while being watched. This was a *medical* professional telling her this. "So," she began skeptically, "you're telling me that I need to come in here and have someone else do it to me? While you...watch?"

"Well I like to use the word 'observe.' I want you to take some time to think about this, but given the intensity of your reaction, I do think this is the only way we will be able to diagnose your condition."

"So if it's not me using the dildo, who would do it? Like, who is going to do that to me?" There was annoyance in her voice.

"Well that would be up to you. I do have a colleague...she's female also, don't worry...she could perform the procedure, or you can bring a trusted person. As I understand it you are unattached at the moment, is that right?"

"Yep." Thanks for making me feel worse about that, Allegra thought bitterly.

"Well is there anyone you'd feel comfortable with, who can be trusted to come in to the office and assist you with this?" Doctor Khatri said this tenderly, trying to be gentle.

Allegra's mind went blank. She thought of her ex, who had a new girlfriend. Waves of anger poured over her body as the thought came to her. She thought of all of the men in her instagram DMs who would *love* to do this for her. This disgusted her. She thought of her running partner, but they had more of a platonic thing. She thought of her mom, strangely. Amy *would* help her with this because she has absolutely no boundaries and would probably judge the hell out of her in the process.

"Nope, I can't think of anyone right now..." Allegra seethed as she said this.

Doctor Khatri could tell her patient was upset and knew not to push. "Okay, why don't you take some time to think this over, and call my office to make an appointment if you decide you're comfortable with this? Just tell Gina you're making a special procedural appointment and she'll set everything up for you. Okay?" She rose to signal an end to the appointment.

Allegra stared blankly ahead of her. "Fine."

She got up, grabbed her tote bag and phone, and looked straight ahead of her as she walked out, avoiding her doctor's gaze. As she walked out into the hallway and waited for the elevator, she put a hand on her crotch, and squeezed in frustration. Why couldn't she just enjoy sex? Why did this have to happen to her? It was embarrassing, painful, and made her not want to fuck anyone.

As she walked out of the building she pulled out her phone. No texts. She checked her Instagram and found 14 responses to her recent story, a video of her naked in bed covered by a sheet, smiling at the camera with the caption "good morning :)".

Just then a text came in from Amaro. "Got a min?"

Allegra tapped back: "NO" then "kinda upset"

"Oh no what's wrong?"

Allegra knew he would care. He was always thoughtful and there for her, like, always. "Can't tell u over txt"

Her phone buzzed immediately "Amaro Calling." She sighed and hesitated to answer. Would she tell him about her situation? They usually shared most intimate details. She knew everything about him; what he liked and hated in bed, and the time he got chlamydia from a Brazilian sex worker. She had even seen him naked one summer at a beach. She remembered wanting to feel his balls; they just looked so compact and round, and oddly smooth. She decided to answer the phone. "I knew you were going to call..." she tried not to smile as she said this.

"Well, yeah, I called! Duh!" He was reassuring and warm. "What's wrong? What happened?"

Allegra sighed deeply. "Ugh I just... I mean... this is kind of hard to say, ya know?"

"Right, yeah. You don't have to tell me anything, but it sounds like you need to talk, so I'm here."

Allegra felt touched by this. "Okay... I mean this is really embarrassing. No one knows about this so you can't tell ANYone, okay?"

"Um, obviously. Tell me."

"Okay," Allegra swallowed hard, waited til the couple on the street near her walked out of earshot. "So, I just came from my therapist, and.. she says I have to do something kind of intense."

"Okayyyy... like what?"

"I mean... so she wants me to uhhhhhh...." She dropped her voice to a whisper and held her iPhone close to her mouth. "I need to basically get fucked in front of her."

Silence on the other end.

"Hello..."

"Uhhhh...." Amaro tried not to smirk, knowing this was upsetting to her. "What do you mean? Is that a thing?"

"Um, I did not THINK it was a thing!" She felt relieved and validated by his surprise.

"So... tell me more then. What do you mean *fucked*?"

"Like, fucked. Like she said I need to have someone use a dildo or something on me until I come basically. And she needs to watch."

"Whoooooa." Amaro was in quiet delight and disbelief. He'd had a decade-long crush on her and the very idea of this made his heart pound. "Why is this happening? I've never heard of anything like this."

"Uh, neither have I!" There was acidic sarcasm in her voice.

"Wait wait wait. Okay. So.... why is this happening? I don't understand."

Allegra groaned audibly. "Becaaaaause. I mean.... remember how the last five guys I've hooked up with left like right in the middle?"

"Yyyyyyeah...?"

"Well!"

Silence as Amaro waited for her to continue. "Well...what?"

"Okay this is fucking embarrassing. I don't even really want to say it out loud."

"Allegra, it's me, come on. I'm not going to laugh or anything. Just tell me."

"Fine... So... lately if I'm having sex with someone, something kind of happens to my body. I don't know why but when I get really turned on while a guy is inside me, I lose control a bit and kind of...like...." she dropped her voice again. "Like I just sort of, have to shit and then it just kind of comes out. And it's gross and I feel pretty terrible and it's making me feel so icky."

Amaro didn't say anything, and Allegra grew increasingly anxious.

"Well what do you think...?"

"Oh, I mean.... that's crazy. Yeah."

"You don't sound.. I mean don't you think that's fucking disgusting?" Allegra cocked her head in disbelief.

"Honestly..." Amaro paused and considered, "I personally think that's a little hot."

"Okay, no you don't. You're just saying that to be nice or...you're gross as fuck," she laughed.

"No I mean, I'm into this actually. Like you telling me that story kind of... got me going." He laughed.

"What?!" She burst out a laugh again. "You're fucking joking."

"I mean, believe me I could show you that I'm not joking."

Allegra blushed a little to herself and felt her heart clamor in her chest. She quickly redirected. "Okay well anyway so I need to decide if I'm going to do this, and how I'm going to do it. She offered her other doctor to do it but that's fucking WEIRD."

"Yeah that definitely is weird. If you need, I could uh... help!"

Allegra paused and considered it for a moment, but responded quickly, "well that's sweet but no thanks. Okay I have to go, I just got home and have to take the dog out. Thanks for listening."

***

A week passed and Allegra tried not to think about it, letting her busy life distract her. She saw a text on her phone from Amaro while cleaning her kitchen. "U around? I'm near u, i could stop by?"

She typed: "sure come on up, just cleaning"

She buzzed him up moments later, before realizing she was only wearing a mauve sports bra and a grey cotton thong. She ran into the bedroom and grabbed her rumpled running shorts from the floor, but in her hurry found ones that barely extended past her hip bone. She threw on a crop tank and went to open the door. Amaro stared at her, eyes magnetized to her long bare legs. "Well hello!"

Allegra smiled, slightly embarrassed but mostly glowing in validation. "Sorry I'll put something else on, i just was home alone."

"Nah don't bother." Amaro walked in, wearing a fitted white shirt and tight jeans. Allegra noticed his bulge was prominent, seeing the round hint of his package.

She sat on her couch and Amaro flopped down lazily beside her, grazing against her arm with his. They chatted about nothing for a few minutes before he asked, "so have you thought about the procedure? What're you thinkin'?"

Allegra took her blonde-brown hair out of the tight pony, and reset it nervously. "Ughhhh, I mean, I don't know! I don't really feel comfortable, I don't want her other doctor friend to do it, and I don't really have like a fuck buddy or partner to do it for me, so..."

"But if you don't figure this out... I mean what are your other options, right?"

"I know, you're right, I just..." Allegra fixated on his knees for some reason, then let her eyes wander a bit to his thighs. "The other doctor is a woman... I just can't see how I'd even be able to get, like, turned on by that, ya know? She told me I have to actually be into it or she wouldn't be able to see what's causing it."

"I know *I* couldn't just get into it with some rando doctor. That's so sterile and clinical. Don't you have anyone who could go with you and do this?" Amaro turned his head to look at her.

"Like WHO?" She turned to look at him, and they stared at each other for a moment.

"I said I'd go with you, what's the big deal?"

"Am, no, you can't go with me. That's like, so weird!"

"Oh please, we've seen each other naked before. I know everything about your sex life, what more is there to hide?" Amaro tried to keep his voice passive to conceal how badly he wanted to do this with her.

"Okay there is a HUGE difference between me telling you about fucking someone and you... like... doing that to me. There's nothing sexual or physical about us talking about stuff." Allegra glanced down, without thinking, to where his dick would be. She wondered if he was erect.

"Well would you rather have some doctor do that to you or someone who cares about you, who would actually do a good job and make you feel comfortable?" As he said this he leaned his head a little closer to hers.

She let herself lean towards him, feeling touched by his offer, and conflicted about it. She let the back of her hand graze his thigh. "I... just don't think that's.... I mean it's really sweet of you, but...we've never done anything like that, I really feel like it would be weird to just go there and —" she paused as she felt his hand on her neck, pulling her close. Her body felt jolted by his touch.

Amaro's kiss was softer than she expected. Gentle. Loving at first, but exciting and unexpected. Her hand fell idly to his stomach, the side of her palm resting on his stiff bulge. She was tempted to look for the zipper, but stopped herself, and somehow pushed him away. "Whhhhatttttt are you doing..." she said breathlessly. She was smiling but wished she wasn't.

"Okay, so now we've kissed...still think it would be weird?"

Just then her Boston Terrier Elly jumped into her lap and broke all tension. Allegra was relieved. "I'll think about it. I have to take this one out now anyway."

***

Another week passed, without any mention of the kiss.

Allegra texted Amaro a Google Maps address. "Meet me here tomorrow, 6pm..."

She had barely hit send before the reply: [thumbs up emoji]

***

(The next day)

She waited outside the building, a brownstone on a quiet block. She locked and unlocked her phone, swiping and scrolling through Instagram without looking at any one thing.

"Hi."

Allegra turned to see Amaro, wearing a white Henley shirt and green fitted chino pants, with clean white sneakers. "Hiiiii..." her voice conveyed her nerves and he put his hand on the small of her back.

"You okay?"

"I am.... not.... but thank you for being here."

They walked up the steps, Amaro in front.

"Wait," Allegra pulled at his shirt to stop him. "Are you sure you're okay with this? I really don't feel great about it and if you want to —"

"I am 100% okay with this. Don't worry. We'll just do it together." He continued up the stairs, paused, and put out a hand towards her. She put her hand on his and felt reassured, for just that moment.

As they walked into the office, Allegra noticed no one else was there. The receptionist, Gina, seemed to have left for the night, her swivel chair pushed neatly under the desk. Dr. Khatri appeared suddenly, smiling warmly. "Hi Allegra, I'm ready for you. I've cleared the office so we'll be totally private. Come on back." She beckoned them to follow her, and led them to her usual exam room. The lights were off except for a single desk lamp projecting warm yellow light from the back of the office.

"You must be Amaro, hello. I'm Tamara Khatri ." She extended her hand to his and gave it a warm shake. Amaro was struck by the strength of her hands, despite having narrow fingers and well-lotioned skin. "Allegra, why don't you get changed into the gown I left for you on the couch, I'll come back in a few moments when you're ready." She walked out and gently closed the door.

Amaro kept standing. "Do you want me to uh... should I come back?"

Allegra shrugged. "Whatever. At this point I think it doesn't matter so much!" She laughed nervously, and swiftly took off her fluffy pink sweater to reveal her slender, elongated midriff. She was 5'10, slender, and somewhat toned, thanks to a strict running regiment. She wore a black Victoria's Secret bra, with white straps pulled tight to raise her breasts up. She was a 32C on a good day, today being one of those days. She tried not to look at Amaro, feeling his eyes on her, as she unzipped her black skinny jeans and bent down to roll them off, removing her black ankle boots in the process. Her panties were a satin black to match, with a white lace pattern on the edges, in a cheeky bikini cut that hugged her small cheeks.

"Wow," Amaro said, unsure if he should comment but unable to control himself.

"Thanks... and shut up," she laughed. "Help me with this gown?"

Amaro rose and stood behind her, tying it loosely and savoring the curve of her back. His pants grew tighter as he let the back of his hands graze her lower back. He wanted to spin her around, kiss her, and put her perfect breasts in his mouth, and his heart raced at the thought. "Allllll set...." he said weakly. He sat on the couch, erection poking up obviously, and he grabbed a pillow to hide it. Allegra gingerly sat near him, goosebumps covering her exposed skin and causing her to shiver. The couch was a deep green velvet, which helped her warm up a bit.

A knock on the door. "Are we ready?" Dr. Khatri slowly opened and walked in the room. "How're we feeling?"

"Ummmmm... a bit weird?" Allegra's voice cracked a bit as she said it.

"I understand, but don't be nervous! This is going to be just fine," she reassured, in a sincere tone that made Allegra wish she was her mother. "So let me explain how this will work. Did you bring a toy or would you like me to provide one?"

Allegra looked at Amaro and motioned with her head for him to take it out. He opened her bag, taking out a large purple dildo, curved more smoothly and artistically than a real penis.

"Ok," Dr. Khatri continued. "So Allegra, when we begin, I'll ask you to start stimulating yourself to get comfortable. If you want Amaro to be involved that's fine too, whatever will relax you. I'll have you lay on your back on the couch, you can rest on the pillow if you'd like too."

Allegra leaned back a bit, finding a mustard yellow knitted pillow by the arm rest near her.

"So what we want, here, is to recreate the stages of arousal that lead to your completion. If your body has the adverse reaction, we'll stop, and I'll run some quick vital tests, and ask you a few questions. Then, if you're okay with it, I'll have you continue until you complete, and we'll do tests again in the end. I want you to do your best to pretend I'm not here. I'll be sitting in the corner taking notes on your physiological changes, but it's most important that you can relax and try to feel natural pleasure if possible. Does that make sense?"

Allegra nodded.

"Okay, we'll begin in just a moment. Now Amaro, we'll need you to take it slowly, and do your best to keep her relaxed and comfortable. Can you do that?"

He nodded and smiled, looking at Allegra.

"Okay then, I'm going to go over here, and if you need to stop, just say so at any time. You can begin whenever you're ready." She walked over to her leather Eames chair, now pushed to the far corner, and sat quietly, adjusting her dark brown hair into a high pony and keeping her eyes looking down.

Amaro looked at Allegra, who stared back meekly. "You okay?" He said softly. She nodded, and another nervous laugh escaped her. He motioned for her to twist opposite him, and started to massage her back. He felt her immediately sink into his touch, and drooped her shoulders in submission. He came in closer to her, letting warm exhales onto her neck so she could feel his proximity.

She turned her head to look upwards at him, and he immediately kissed her. Her body seized up in excitement and for a moment she forgot where she was. She closed her eyes, putting her trust in him and hoping he would help her escape the feeling of being watched by her 42-year old therapist. She felt his hands move down from her shoulders to her collar bones, continuing downward to the top of her breasts. He stayed above the gown, testing her reaction. Her deep exhale told him to continue, and she dropped her head onto his shoulder above her.

She felt the tie of the gown loosen as he slipped a hand along her ribcage and lower abdomen, running along the top of her panties. Her hips involuntarily pushed forward. She tugged at her gown, feeling hot and needing cooler air on her skin. Amaro took the hint and pulled it off, exposing her nearly nude body. She opened her legs instinctively, inviting him to continue. She opened her eyes quickly and glanced at Dr. Khatri, who had her head down, writing in a notepad.