bookTWO
:
STARshine
* * *
silence swimming in a pool of dreams / beneath its depths the forgotten streams / above the city of the evening star / behind its walls, the grand bazaar / as she walks through its endless ways / cursing those who mistrust her ways / please my friend no matter what she sees / tell my lover come back to me
* * *
* * *
The power runs on sunlight. That's what I'm thinking as I wake.
Early morning rays stab through the chinks in the single blocked window. Tiny bits of dust dance about in them, wandering aimlessly, randomly through the air.
The chaos of it.
I slip out of bed and find my boots. I wonder if the others are up, before I become conscious of what woke me - a thumping bass reverberates through the house from the garage.
but ya'll can see me now cos you don't see with your eye
you percieve with your mind
For a second, I can't think of what it could be. It doesn't sound natural β but as I listen, there is a method to the madness and I'm able to go back, far back in my mind to music my older brother listened to.
that's the inner
so i'mma' stick around with Russ and be a men-tor
It's a song β a band called Gorillaz, I think. My brother listened to this CD every Goddamn day.
bust a few rhymes so mother fuckers
rememeber where the thought is
I slip out of the bedroom and glance up the hall β the other doors are closed, but I can hear Lisa stirring in the next room. "Where the fuck is that coming from!" I yell down the stairs before coming to the top of the landing.
i brought all this
so you could survive when law is lawless
"Hel-lo? Where is everyone? Who's on guard!"
Something's wrong. I pound down the stairs just in time to see Cypress and Sophie opening the door to the garage.
feelings, sensations that you thought were dead
no squealing, remember
"It's the stereo in the car," Cypress grins up at me. For a second, I can think of nothing better to do than stare at them, oblivious.
(that it's all in your head)
"Sorry Michelle," Sophie finally says, pulling her toque down. "We'll turn it off.
I sit down on the second stair and look up at Cypress β he's not moving. "Is that what you want?" he asks. His hair is in his eyes β for a second, they seem a little too blue, and I can't help but smile back.
i ain't happy, i'm feelin' glad
i got sunshine, in a bag
I don't know how he does that to me.
i'm useless, but not for long
the future is comin' on
"Does it go any louder?" I ask. Sophie grins β Cypress just lights a smoke.
it's comin' on
it's comin' on
it's comin' on
* * *
Hair whips across my face, and I try to keep it out of my eyes. I pull my knees to my chest and put my feet on the dashboard of the car, looking over to Lisa in the driver's seat. Streaming around the perimiter highway, we decided to take our time making it back to the Tower.
Our heads nod in unison to the music, and I look over my shoulder at the others.
Crow and Cat sit at opposite ends of the back seat, both staring out windows while Cypress shows Sophie how to use his discman in the very back of the wagon. Where he found batteries I'll never know.
"Who came up with the idea of using the car stereo anyway?" Lisa says.
"I had the CDs β it was Sophie's idea to stick 'em in the car," Cypress calls up. Lisa gins.
"Who's good at electronics?" she asks. "We have to be able to find a working stereo somewhere, right? For like, the floor."
"The mall!" Sophie chirps. Lisa and I exchange a glance.
"No one's going into the mall to look for a stereo," I say. Lisa just shrugs.
"It's been pretty stable lately," she says. "I didn't even hear anything falling last time it rained."
"That's 'cause you couldn't hear shit over the rain β the whole east side collapsed," I tell her, turning around in my seat and regarding Crow β she's still just staring out her window. I reach out and gently prod her in the ear.
On reflex, she smacks my hand away before turning to look. Her expression is blank β she's just waiting to see what I want.
"What's the deal?" I whisper, pointing my eyes for a second towards Cypress in the back. She takes a breath as if she's about to speak, then thinks better of it and shrugs, turning back to the window silently. I look over at Cat, who's still intentionally avoiding any sort of contact with Crow.
"Who's got smokes?" I ask. A pack of DuMaurs nails me in the forehead, and I pick it up off the floor of the car to see Sophie holding a hand to her mouth.
Sophie's a bit of a smartass, but she knows better to intentionally cross Lisa or I β it was an accident, and I light one before chucking them back. I think I hit Cypress, but I'm not sure.
Some
one said ouch.
I turn around again and kick off my boots and socks, resting my feet out the window to be caressed by the wind as the car rips down the highway. I'm tired β but you're always sort of tired after a floor meeting.
"We should do it again," Lisa says on cue, looking away from the road for a moment.
Lisa and I have always had an uneasy, albiet somewhat symbiotic relationship. As the Alphas for the thirteenth floor we lead the others together, and I don't outrank her any more than she does me.
This causes problems at times, but between the two of us we usually make the right choice. At the very least, we're one of the few floors that hasn't lost a member to the boys or the dogs yet.
"What?" I say.
"Another floor meeting," Lisa says. Crow perks up.
"Tonight?" she asks behind me. Even Cat's looked away from her window.
I've been worried about Cat lately β ever since the night Cypress set her free, she's been acting strangely. She does her duty and shoots when she should, but I can tell her mind is elsewhere.
"We just had one," I say, turning back to the road and my cigarette.
"Yeah, but Cypress missed half of it," Sophie says. "We should
totally
have one tonight. He's probably never even smoked β have you?"
"No, Crow smoked him up," Lisa says.
"Well yeah, like two hoots," Crow shouts over the wind. "He needs to get initiated if he's staying."
Now there is a pause. We're all waiting for Cypress to re-confirm his loyalties, but no words of comfort come from the back of the wagon.
I turn around again, the cigarette hanging softly from my lips and pull off my sunglasses. Cypress is telling Sophie a joke. Or something β she laughs at least.
I look from Cat to Crow, and I get the impression they're both wondering the same thing. Not so much about whether or not he's staying, but what will happen now that he is.
When we were all convinced he'd be gone in a day or two, it seemed alright that each and every one of us wanted to steal him away and learn his secrets. Tell him ours.
He's easy to talk to β what can I say?
But now that he's permanent, we are all faced with the question of what to do with him. Or, perhaps, which of us has the right to know him.
When Cat watched Crow take the room we'd reserved for Cypress, she had the expression of a woman who'd just been shot through the throat. Desperate to cry out, but choking on her own furies.
Like all of us, Cat has no more claim to Cypress than he does to her β but one will feel what one will feel, I suppose.
I decide to take her aside tonight and have a chat with her β she's becoming too distant from the rest of the floor.
Crow, on the other hand, is more positive and active than I've ever seen. Usually, she silently does her job and lets a sarcastic comment or two slip, but I expect she's been behaving for his benefit. She carries herself differently. Usually she moves patiently, smoothly, with conviction. I've always considered her the most feline, but lately she's been proving her namesake. She is quick, alert, restless even. As if she's waiting for some unknown event.
Perhaps I'll have a chat with her as well.
"Maybe a floor meeting is a good idea," Lisa suddenly says. I whip around to look at her, and I can tell we're on the same page. Different as we are, we temper each other well, but always with the well-being of Floor Thirteen in mind.
"You going to take Crow aside?" she says now, softer. I nod.
"Why don't you take Anze and Sophie? I'll take Cat," I say.
"And maybe you and me should have a chat too," she says, glancing to me suddenly. She wants to know where I stand on Cypress.
"Do we need to?" I ask. She raises her eyebrow.
"I dunno β do we?"
"I don't think so β where are you at?"
She looks back to the road.
"I'm just drivin'," she says. "You?"
"I'm nowhere β I'm here. I'm smoking." She nods.
"Alright," she says. "Hey guys! Floor meeting tonight β we're breakin' in the fresh meat."
Sophie claps β Crow silently smiles.
Cat just stares out her window.
I smoke my smoke. It'll be a long day.
* * *
We arrive at the Tower just before noon. I hang out the passenger window and wave up to the sentries to open the gates. A Ceta dashes into the tower, and soon comes out with Phoebe in tow.
She does a double-take when she sees us, then decides on a course of action and strides forward with a scowl on her face.
"I told you to be back yesterday morning!" she shouts. The others pile out of the car and stand behind Lisa and I.
"Fuck you β you sent us down there to die anyway," Lisa snaps back. This is where Lisa and I differ.
Phoebe narrows her eyes at Lisa before turning to me. "Where'd you find a working car β and what the fuck happened to your leg?"
"A long story," I say. "Best told behind closed doors β let's head inside."
* * *
Lisa, Phoebe and I are in the security office just off the main lobby. The others we sent up to thirteen to set up a room for Cypress, while Lisa and I lay out the story of the past two days β with a few embellishments regading the amount of time spent at the safehouse. Phoebe takes her time, leaning back in her chair and closing her eyes before speaking.