He stood outside of the Water Spot, the bar that took the two and a half floors above the bi-level bathhouse called Afterdark. He thought after last Friday entering Afterdark would be easier, or at least the
decision
to enter Afterdark would be much easier to make, but in reality the choice he had to make was harder,
much
harder. The last time he went into the Afterdark, also the first time, was as easy as the decision he made to go into the gay section of the bathhouse upon finding that the straight/bisexual area hot tubs were closed for maintenance. What followed on that fateful day was a surprise, something that he could not have controlled.
Control. That was what the choice was about, control. Whether he knew what he was deciding or not is irrelevant, but it was the controlโor possibly the lack thereofโthat he found himself terrified about. Control is a double edged sword, one edge promised only events that could further a person emotionally, spiritually and even physically but on the other side, the other edge, there was always something that one would missโor on the flip side, gain. Last Friday Wesley let go and the fantasy from being touched by a man was realized by Brent, a hand job and a blow job was given and yet in that loss of control after giving himself over to pleasure, Wesley and Brent were caught and Brent vanished from his life.
And it was Brent that was the other side of the double edged sword named Control. He gave himself up to Brent, not completely but just enough, and in giving himself up to Brent there was something gained, a tiny little thing that neither he or Brent could have foreseen, something blistered and popped, flared and flamed. And thus his lust was born, a lust for a hand and a mouth of a man, a
particular
man whom Wes doubted he would ever see again.
Brent was the first man to touch him, the first
handsome
man to show him just how much he had been missing over the years, and that lead to dirty thoughts in the middle of the day, in the depths of the black night and everywhere in between. He could not get Brent out of his mind, even in class he could not escape the silent fantasy his mind concocted just to torture him with. His mind taunted him with pictures of Brent naked and sitting in various positions with that wonderful hard-on standing at attention in front of him, with images of Brent pleasuring him manually and orally; even worse than that, his mind gave him images of Brent sitting with his hands behind him, his head up towards the darkened ceiling with his eyes closed and mouth open; his legs slightly opened and Wes leaned over with his arched back and his mouth posed over the wonderful head connected to an aroused, hardened shaft.
The images of Brent sitting on the side of the churning water of the hot tub with steam smoking up towards the ceiling with his legs open and his hand softly caressing his own hard member while Wesley just watched from the other side that made his pants tent in the middle of Computer Programming 1A while the teacher droned on about polymorphism and inheritance of classes in regards to C++. The images of Brent with his hand down under his groin gently stroking his sack with his other hand reaching out and caressing Wesley's shaft made the erection under his blanket impossible to resist. It was the image of Brent kneeling behind Wesley in the doggy position with his finger pressing into his tight, virgin ass that made Wesley probe his tailhole with the tip of his finger.
It was those images combined with the unfulfillable lust and arousal that made him think of returning to Afterdark on this Friday night at almost three in the morning after drinking lightly with a few friends at the Other Side club for Alternative Lifestyles and heterosexuals with open minds. He had a chance to get laid, a young lady wanted to take him home and ride him until he could stand it no more, but that was not what he wanted. What he wanted was a nice man to pleasure him both with his hand and his mouth, and if he felt adventurous or lost Control maybe a little more...
That was doubtful, though he lusted for a finger or something else in his backside he could not see himself involved in that, not yet at least. That lust was what brought him to the Wet Spot which contained the entrance to the Afterdark both inside and at the back of the building, but it was also the attraction to Brent that made him wonder if this was such a good idea.
Not everything he thought about was sexual when it came to Brent, in more than one fantasy he thought of him and Brent down at the Endsville Cafewhere all they did was talk, learn and eventually start to understand each other. He also saw them at dinner, over at Brent's place watching movies and a host of other relationship-type things. The images of him and Brent down in Afterdark under the Wet Spot aroused him with the unavoidable thoughts of entering the bathhouse; yet the images of him and Brent on a date, or just at coffee warmed his heart and demanded him not to enter, thus the majority of his predicament.
So he stood in front of the Wet Spot pondering his situation and the solution for each, both ended on a positive note but each had the undercurrent of something not as positive below the warming pleasure. He knew the risks of going inside, he may find someone and have a sexual encounter and thus he might feel a little guilty giving himself up to someone else. On the other side of the coin he had no idea where Brent worked, lived or played beyond Afterdark, therefore if he did not go in there would be absolutely no chance for them to see each other again. Another intrusive thought entered his mind, what if he
did
see Brent inside of the bathhouse? What if he wanted to go at it again (in a proper, sex
allowed
location) and all he wanted was to get off? Naturally he would feel used and low, but maybe that was what he needed.
*****
He wandered aimlessly through the dark halls of the gay section, after a short while he found himself in the hall between the porn television room to his right and the pair of showers to his left where he saw Josh and Dan. The event that started everything that had happened the Friday previous.
A middle aged man draped in his white cotton towel sat on one of the comfortable black clothed chairs with a massive erection hidden partly by his hand and the towel, his eyes were glued to the angled television Wesley could not see. The middle aged man glanced over to Wesley and smiled, he had a well-groomed goatee looking less than a week old. He turned back to the television and started to stroke himself slowly up and down over the towel hiding his erection.
Wesley turned away, before he made any decision for whom he
might
share some sort of experience with he wanted to take a full look around the place, in his heart he hoped,
prayed
that he would find Brent somewhere inside. He glanced into the shower room half expecting to see Josh and Dan inside with Dan on his knees suckling on Josh's cock, the shower room was empty. He reached up and tapped his mouth wondering where to go next, he had not gone to the other shower room which had the sauna's or the hot tubs yet, and he had not gone down into the second sub-level yet either.
After having such a wonderful time in the hot tub last week he decided to start there and make another full circle around the upper level of this portion, after that he could decide whether he wanted to try and have a look downstairs. Almost aimlessly, Wesley wandered through the halls with a multitude of doors leading into small rooms on his sides, out of every hallway he saw at least one light on, once in a while he saw two but no more than that.
He turned right down the final hallway before the dual hot tubs and heard a
whack
and a sudden cry from his left further in, almost scared he started to slowly and soundlessly walk towards the end of the hall glancing at the floor and looking for the room that he heard the