Chapter One: In The Beginning
There are those of us who still remember the Private Investigator of old like Phillip Marlow and Sam Spade. For those to young it's a pity for you certainly missed one of the most golden of eras when a Private Eye was tough. He gave no quarter and expected even less for himself. It's my hope for the older generation to turn back the clock a few years so they may remember those wonderful days past. As for the younger ones, I hope to bring them some of the joy we felt. I will now apologize if my meager attempts aren't quite up to the writers past. Now in the beginning...
It's a small corner office situated on the third floor of a dilapidated rundown building. Outside the grimy windows one could see the dirty street, papers moving along the curb pushed by gusts of wind and a few steel hulls that were once the pride of Detroit. It didn't make any difference which window your gaze happened upon, the view was the same either way.
The day was warm as I sat with my feet propped up on my desk going through my files, all six of them. Even though it was stuffy I refused to open a window and let the dusty stench invade, so I made do with a fan blowing the stale air around. It was Monday. God I hate Mondays because it comes before Tuesday. The small clock chimed nine just as the door creaked open. I look up and saw a woman rush in and quickly close the door. She leaned her back against it and sighed. Oh, wow, when she sighed she really got my attention. Let me put it another way, I was sure two of the buttons in the front of her snug blouse would pop off, but of course they didn't. Now you know one reason I hate Mondays.
"You're Mr. Stud?" her small voice quivered.
"That's what it says on the door, lady. What can I do for you?" I know what I would have liked to do, but figured getting her name first would be polite. "First tell me who you are."
"Smith, yeah, Joan Smith."
"OK, Joan Smith, now what's on your mind?" Uh huh, Smith and I was Rockefeller.
"I need help, protection. You do protect people don't you? How much will it cost me?"
"Yup and it's a hundred a day plus expenses." She was young and pretty and very scared. I saw her face drop as she opened the door.
"Oh. I can't afford that much," she all but whispered rushing out before I could mention working something out.
Well, you win some, you loose some. I don't know why but I looked out the window and saw her leave the building. Her head didn't move to look as she stepped off the corner. She got about half way across the street when I heard the squealing of tires and saw the big black car. Smith's head spun towards the sound just in time to see the chrome bumper and the hood. Her body must have flown twenty feet before hitting the ground. As she lay crumpled in the gutter I saw the car gaining speed followed by a cloud of dust. It wouldn't take a genius to know she was dead, but I went down anyway. Yup, dead as last week's news but still pretty.
Well the cops came, asking a bunch of stupid questions. They wanted to know what I knew but I wasn't talking. There was something I had seen in her eyes that said keep quiet. The cops left shortly after being their usual sloppy selves. It never seemed to occur to them she might have been going to her car. Only one was left that could have run and I checked it out. Inside was a small handbag with a drivers license. It was her, Joan Smith, but the wasn't her real name. The picture matched and her name was Joan Sanders. Well it was fairly close I suppose.
I decided it was time to return to my office and think about this. My mind moved slowly trying to remember if there was anything Ms. Sanders might have said that would give me a clue, but there didn't seem to be anything. I was looking through the phone directory hoping she might be listed when the door opened again. Looking over the edge of my desk I saw a well turned ankle leading to a very shapely calf. It's twin joined the first looking every bit as nice. Couldn't tell you about the feet being they were contained inside a pair of black high heeled shoes, but I did know they were rather small.
It was natural I wanted to see more as my eyes slowly moved higher. By now the legs became attached to a body wearing a, how best to say it, painted on dress with slits on both sides. When the legs moved the slits opened baring quite a bit of thigh and nice thighs they were, too. In turn they were joined to hips that swelled gently outward just below a very trim waist. There wasn't much to see above that being covered by a thick large fur piece, I think it's called a stole. When my eyes saw the face my feet, again propped on top my desk, hit the floor with a thud. It was her, Joan Sanders, or so my brain said, but she was freshly dead.
"She was my twin sister," the silken sultry voice said. Her ruby red lips remained slightly parted showing brilliant white teeth. "I'm Sandy Sanders."
"Pleased to meet you Ms. Sanders," I replied as calmly regaining my composure. I sat back down resting my feet back on my desk.
"Are you a dick?" she asked smiling.
"My friends don't think so, only my enemies. If you mean a Private Investigator the answer is yes, just like it says on the door."