Superman never made any money,
Savin' the world from Solomon Grundy.
And sometimes I despair
The world will never see another man like him.
Superman's Song, Β©The Crash Test Dummies
*****
Chapter 1 How it all started
As a boy, and later a young man, in a time before cell phones, paramedics, CPR, personal computers, and ever-present video cameras, I survived a very strange period in my life. Weird things can happen to anyone and I'm no exception. But to have a number of coincidental incidents happen to you in a sequence over a number of years ... well ... a bunch of people, my friends and parents, began to think of it as more than a coincidence.
It began when I was nine years old on April 10th, 1965, at 12:45pm in a school yard in a community near Vancouver, on the west coast of Canada. It was lunch hour and my pals and I were out playing a game of pick-up softball. Hell, it was early spring and the sun was out and we were determined to be outdoors. Anyway, I was playing right field, seeing as how I was considered a "feeb" by my fellow players. I could catch, but my throwing arm was weak and my batting was weaker. The only safe place for me then, was right field.
One of the batters hit a long fly ball my way and I was pretty sure it was going to go foul, but I chased it because I might be able to make an out; assuming I could catch it, of course. Right alongside the field was a road. Not a really busy road, but there were cars going back a forth now and then. As I chased the ball, I heard a voice call out "I'll get it." It sounded like a girl's voice, so I took my eye off the ball to see who was calling.
It was a girl, alright, but to my horror, she was drifting out onto the street and I could see a car coming right at her. I put on a burst of speed and got to her a couple of seconds before the car did and grabbing her arm, I yanked her back out of the vehicle's path. My reward for that was one angry young girl.
"What did you do that for?" she snapped when I helped her up to her feet.
"That car was coming right at you. It was probably going to hit you. Didn't you see it?"
"You're making that up," she snarled as a couple of her friends gathered around her.
"He saved your life, Kelsey," one of them said.
"He saved your life," the girl repeated, wide-eyed.
I wasn't sure Kelsey whoever was buying that, but I wasn't really worried about it. The incident was over and I walked back and took up my position in the outfield. The first baseman had safely retrieved the ball from across the street.
"Nice going 'Soup," my pal Chug said, slapping me on the back. "Just like Superman swoops down and saves Lois Lane. That car was going to run her over for sure. Some little old lady who could hardly see over the dashboard was driving it. She never stopped ... she never even slowed down. She had no clue what happened."
"Really?" I said in surprise. "I really did save her?"
"Yeah. Like I said, just like Superman," he grinned, smacking me again, this time on the shoulder.
I felt pretty good about that. I felt real good about that, in fact. Maybe that girl Kelsey didn't realize it, but my guys did. Hell, they were the only ones that counted anyway. We only had time for one more batter before the bell rang and we had to go back into the school and head for our classrooms.
When I got to the door where all the kids were filing in, I saw Mrs. Usher standing there, and she had her eyes on me. Oh Oh! Was I in trouble?
"I saw what you did, Ian," she said as she took me aside. "That was very brave of you. You probably saved Kelsey from being badly injured, or possibly worse. You should be very proud of yourself, acting as quickly as you did. I'm sure Kelsey is very grateful."
"Uhhm ... well ... maybe not. I think I hurt her arm, and she fell on her bum when I dragged her off the street. She was pretty mad at me."
"I understand. Don't worry, Ian, I'll talk to her and let her know just how brave you were. I'm sure she'll feel better about what you did," she smiled.
"Thanks, Mrs. Usher. I'm glad I was able to help her."
"I'm pretty sure that was dear old Mrs. McGonagall driving that car," she said, thoughtfully. "I think it's time she turned in her license. I don't think she even knew how close she came to causing a tragic accident. I'll call her and let her know what I saw. In the meantime, you skedaddle to your homeroom or you'll be late," she smiled again.
"Okay. Thanks, Mrs. Usher," I said as I ran up the stairs and down the hallway to my home room.
"What did old lady Usher want with you?" Chug asked.
"Uhhm ... she wanted to thank me for saving that girl, Kelsey. She saw the whole thing. She said I probably saved her life."
"Oh yeah, for sure, Soup. So, she saw what you did, huh? You'll be famous now." He managed to smack me on the shoulder again, and it wasn't a light smack.
I spent the rest of the afternoon wrestling with Math and English literature. I hated poetry, mostly because I could never understand what the writer was saying. Why do they make you read poetry in grade four? Cripes, some of these people died two hundred years ago. Anyhow, it was over and I headed out the front door to catch the school bus. When I got to the bottom of the steps, who should be waiting for me but Kelsey what's-her-face. Oh great.
"Hi, Ian," she greeted me in a nice, friendly voice.
"Uhhm, hi Kelsey."
"I want to thank you for saving me. Mrs. Usher told me that you stopped me from getting killed. You were very brave. I'm sorry I didn't thank you when you did that."
"I'm sorry I hurt your arm and made you fall, Kelsey. I wasn't thinking, just grabbing you and pulling you away from the road."
"I know. I'm not hurt. I was just surprised. I didn't see the car until after it passed me. You did a very brave thing," she smiled ... and then she did the worst possible thing. She stepped toward me and kissed me on the lips. Yuck!
She smiled and giggled and ran off to be with her friends, who were also giggling in their little girl voices. Oh man, I'll never live this down. Kissed by a girl on the front steps of the school in front of everyone. Yuck and double yuck!