Felix's transition from sleep to consciousness was, as always, instantaneous. Opening his eyes, he blinked once against the pale predawn light, and was wholly alert before he drew his first waking breath. Despite the deep pleasure he took in the warmth of Jamie's still-sleeping body sprawled atop his chest, he became immediately aware of two sources of discomfort. One was his neck, cricked at an awkward angle against a makeshift pillow comprising Jamie's destroyed clothing. The second was his cock, fully erect and throbbing, rising between Jamie's smooth thighs. Thin as the girl was, she didn't provide a thick enough barrier, and the head of his shaft protruded to rub against the rough wool blanket covering them. Felix shifted slightly and winced from the raspy fibers that snagged his sensitive skin.
He toyed briefly with the idea of lifting Jamie, tipping her hips, and using the swell of the ship's movement to softy fuck her awake. It would, he thought, be delicious to coax her swollen folds into permitting his invasion, teasing her, entering by increments as he had the night before. Only the thought of her recently lost virginity kept him from acting on the impulse. The fact that she'd lost her hymen—likely years before—to her physical work as a sailor didn't necessarily preclude any soreness, and, always aware of her past, Felix was as yet reluctant to initiate any sexual contact to which she had not consciously consented.
Administering to her body's needs, however, was another matter entirely. That had to be done, and if Felix could finish before she awoke, he could perhaps spare her the embarrassment to which she seemed particularly susceptible.
Doing his best to move smoothly and silently, Felix tightened the hand that still rested on her backside and raised his other to cradle her head. He rolled then, taking the blanket with them, and landed on his knees so that Jamie lay on her back and he knelt above her, his body arched, hands still beneath her to cushion her landing. Gently extracting his hands, he rose to a kneeling position and paused for a moment to study the girl.
She was still deeply asleep, her short red hair framing her face in choppy waves. Unlike other redheads Felix had known, only a faint trace of freckles smattered her nose and cheekbones, and both her brows and lashes were several shades darker than her copper locks. Beside her bright head, one hand lay palm-up while the other rested in the severe hollow of her stomach. Her abraded breasts, nearly flattened against her chest, rose and fell with her steady breathing. Pathetically thin and bearing multiple dark bruises, her body showed only slight signs of improvement from the day and a half she'd spent on board the Lady May. But she was clean now at least, and deeply relaxed, seemingly at peace. She had a meal inside her—two, in fact—and Felix would see to it that she had as much good food as she could hold. It was one of the few things he could promise her with any measure of certainty.
Hoping to finish before she woke, Felix moved to gather his salve pot, a clean cloth, the wash bucket. The water was cold now, tinged gray-pink with coal soap and Thaniel's blood, but it was all Felix had at hand, and he needed very little water anyway. He dipped the cloth, wrung until only moisture remained, then moved between Jamie's slightly sprawled legs. Wishing he had a pillow to slip beneath her hips, Felix settled instead for one of his hands, tipped up to expose her more fully.
He used the dampened cloth to clean his dried semen from her inner thighs and pubic hair, then wiped between each fold before he covered one finger with the fabric and gently washed inside her body. Jamie shifted at his invasion, moaning softly and opening her thighs slightly wider, making Felix smile at the trust she gave to him unconsciously. Pleased not to see any of her blood on the cloth, he used it then to wash his still semi-hard shaft before tossing it quickly aside.
He'd lowered her to the ground and was fiddling with the lid on the salve pot when Jamie gasped, snapped her legs together, and bolted upright. She blinked rapidly, obviously still disoriented with sleep, then sagged in relief when Felix reached out, shushing her. Setting one big hand on her shoulder, he began to rub it and the back of her neck, while Jamie closed her eyes and breathed deep, waiting for her heart to fall from her throat and settle back into her chest. It took several minutes, then she swallowed once and tilted her cheek to rest against Felix's thick wrist.
"Alright now?" he asked.
Jamie opened her eyes to find Felix's face bent close to hers, his concern evidenced by the deep crease between his eyes. She turned to kiss his wrist, then straightened. "Yes," she said, slightly shaky, still battling the last remnants of panic. "I don't often wake naked with a man between my legs, is all."
Felix smiled despite his slight sense of guilt, then raised the salve pot for her to see. "I'm sorry," he said. "I was trying to use this before you woke, seeing how you hate it so much."
"Felix—" Jamie recoiled, the pleading apparent in her tone.
His hand, still on the back of her neck, slid around to silence her imminent protests. She looked at him, dark blue eyes beseeching over the top of his hand, and he felt the force of her appeal but did not allow it to dissuade him from his intent.
"I don't do this to hurt or shame you," he said. "You do know that, don't you, girl?"
Unable to speak, she nodded, her mouth moving against his hard palm.
"And I won't have you healing improperly," he continued, "becoming ill, hurting for any longer than is necessary."
Jamie's head bowed, but Felix could still read resistance in the rigid lines of her body. The chords in her neck were starkly defined, her back mainmast straight, both hands fisted atop her upraised knees. Taking his hand from her mouth, Felix resumed massaging her neck and shoulders, but she was so tense now there was hardly any give at all to her skin. He waited, hoping she would concede freely, but after several minutes she remained stiff and unyielding.
"Please, Jamie," he whispered, "don't make me force you."
Had it been possible, Jamie would have tightened her muscles further still against Felix's touch. She felt a quick spurt of fury that he would appropriate her pain, that he would take her reluctance to hurt him and use it in such a way that she was forced instead to hurt herself. She unfisted her hands from atop her knees and gripped the joints until they groaned in protest, all the while biting her tongue to keep bitter words from spilling forth.
Then her shoulders slumped, her anger draining away as quickly as it had erupted. As he said, he did not mean to hurt her, and she would rather have his empathy—as imperfect as it must necessarily be—than his indifference. Still, though, she could not quite manage to look at him while he did this.
Moving quickly, not giving her mind the chance to rebel against her body, she rolled to her knees then leaned forward, curled herself into a ball, pressed her forehead against the rough wool blanket while her hands gripped fistfuls of fabric.
