Glassy eyes periodically "stare" at me as I pass by. When I say glassy, I mean eerie shit like, no iris.
Shiver. Where in the world am I?
Last I remember I was walking to the car with my girlfriend from a movie talking, no, fighting about my apparent obsessiveness with increasingly crazy sexual concepts that she started to want no part of.
We were at that stage where the novelty had worn off and we could tell each other anything. I stayed with her because she proved herself willing to be crazy with me in bed. Gradually going from ass slaps to dirty talk, to dirty talk about taboo subjects to golden showers and it seemed she was getting into it at the time. Lately, her conscience has been pulling her away and our fights started to become more frequent with more and more blame pointing. We were near the end. I began to hold back, silently holding a grudge. But not nearly as good as she was. She was oblivious, thinking that I was finally "coming to reality".
I had to initiate sex almost all the time now. And she became the giver and taker of all things horizontal. She had the power. I hated it. I would try not to suggest or make any move for a couple of days hoping that she would notice and would initiate intimacy at which time I planned to flatly refuse, thus reclaiming my power. Fat chance. She either didn't care or didn't notice. She was fine going for days, weeks, months I'm sure if I'd ever let it get to that point. All the while I was growing more and more bitter.
Something had to give. I started thinking evil things about her. Making her my fucking slave. Making her beg. Hard. Making her cry. Coming on to other girls in plain view of her. Making her help me fuck someone I brought home while she cried and begged me not to do it while the whole time, she was and knew she was powerless to leave me. The cunt.
Yeah, it got bad. Bad to the point that I started actually hating her. And little by little, I would sometimes be listening to her speak to me about something generic to our day, oblivious to the fact that I was looking at her through slits spitting fire imagining the absolute worst. I wouldn't even fake a smile anymore. I wanted her to suffer. And I didn't care if she guessed it.
"Hey Adrian, did you hear what I said???"
"Nope".
"Why are we even spending time together if you don't want my company?"
"Haven't a clue."
"Adrian, do you want to end this?"
"Nope."