I'm on a mission -- to bring pleasure to men. As I am blessed with intelligence, beauty and a killer smile, it is an easy mission for me. But it brings such pleasure to men. I never realised how much men like women. It makes them very happy to bring happiness to a woman. They only need the chance. Men love to do things for me. And they enjoy it when I touch them -- with a hand or a hug or patting their arses.
And I see a lot of men. Especially when I work in a coffee shop on Fri nights and Saturdays, when the shop is really busy. My older lover -- who died not so long ago -- said I had an irresistible smile, and it does seem to work 99.999876% of the time. I vaguely recall once when it didn't.
One bloke in particular loves my smile. Dominic.
'That's one sensational smile,' he said, the first time I flashed it at him. He gave me a mighty fine smile in return.
He always says, 'Love your smile Candy. Never seen one better,' when he comes in for his regular Friday night large flat white.
Then, one Friday night, he was late. Very late. We were about to close. Then he turned up. Looked a bit distressed. Barely smiled when I smiled at him. Didn't make his usual comment. And he looked so sad drinking his coffee. So sad. We were closing up -- well, I was, as the manager had had to go -- so I told him he could stay for a while.
'Thanks,' he said, weakly.
I wanted to hug him.
'You OK?' I asked.
'No, not really.'
I got him another coffee -- with a slug of brandy. Told him it was on the house, with a little extra.
He sipped it.
'Mmmm, that is good. Very good.'
He drank it rather quickly as he wrote away in his book.
'What are you writing?' I asked.
'Just venting my feelings.'
'Got a few?'
'Plenty. Plenty. I just lost my job. The guy who took over at the start of the year has screwed the business right up. Taken it from a good business doing good work to a broke business doing useless work. Couldn't organise a screw in the proverbial, this bloke. But paid himself a lot of money. A lot of money.'
I got him another coffee. He offered me $20. I declined. But I joined him, as I was all but done. Mmm, that coffee tasted good with brandy in it. I got us both another one.
We fell in one of those long, deep conversations about work, life and what's important. I told him my mission. He laughed.
'That's too easy for a woman like you. There must be a million ways you can make a man smile. You're utterly lovely.'