Uncle Ray was really considerate. He and his girlfriend Karen offered me a place to stay. I truly appreciated their generosity. Their apartment wasn't big enough for three, but they put me up while I looked for a place.
Real estate prices were nothing like they are now - but neither were wages. The problem was simple: I couldn't afford a one-bedroom anywhere near the garage. But I didn't want to give up the best job I'd ever had.
I was really surprised when my cousin's girlfriend called me.
- "Hey dickweed." she said.
- "Laurie?"
- "The one and only." she said. "Listen, I heard through the grapevine that you're looking for new digs."
- "Wow." I said. "Word travels fast."
- "So it's true?" said Laurie. "Hey - Ron and I are at the Lion." That was a pub, not too far from the garage where I worked. "Can you meet us there? Like, now?"
I rode my bike, wondering if Laurie really did have a solution to my problem. She and Ron were already there. I'd always liked the Lion. It was typical English pub: dark wood, a great selection of beers on tap, dartboards, and a collection of eccentric regulars.
- "Good timing." said Ron. We were about to go have a look."
- "A look? At what?"
- "At the apartment we're thinking of renting." said Laurie. "Ronnie and me, plus Rose - but it's a four-bedroom. Split the rent four ways instead of three, and it's a bargain."
- "You're kidding me." I said. I had met Laurie's friend: Rose was a big girl, but nice. If this was possible, it could solve my immediate problem.
I didn't even order a pint. Ronnie and Laurie drained theirs, and we walked around the corner - two blocks away.
It was a massive old house - the ground floor was now a lawyer's office. The second floor was for rent. There was a door on the side, which led to a set of stairs, completely separate from the first-floor office.
The landlord was waiting, and took us in. The house was old, but it did have some character. The stairs led into a good-sized kitchen, with a sloping ceiling. There were two bedrooms at the back of the house, with a small bathroom between them.
The main bathroom was on the other side of the kitchen, opposite another bedroom. The last bedroom was a bit bigger, and there was a living room, with a small balcony, overlooking the street.
I had never looked at a place with a mind to renting it before, but Laurie was no fool. She quizzed the landlord about utilities, noise during the day, parking, and a whole bunch of other stuff.
The landlord informed us that no pets were allowed.
- "He's not a pet." said Ronnie. "He's my cousin."
I was more concerned about how clean it was, and the water pressure in the shower (excellent). On top of that, I was trying to picture how four people could live together, without driving each other nuts.
Ronnie asked the most important question. "How much?"
The price was ridiculous - for one person. Split four ways, it was incredibly cheap. We excused ourselves, and went to talk it over.
- "Whaddya think, Joe?" said Laurie. "Could you handle living with us?
And
Rose?"
- "Could you guys live with
me
?"
I was already sold. It was two blocks from the Lion, and exactly six blocks, in the opposite direction, from Uncle Ray's garage. I had to get out of my house - and here was a heaven-sent solution.
"Thank you, Laurie. Thanks, Ron. This looks great. Count me in."
***
We took possession at the beginning of July.
I helped Ronnie and Laurie move their stuff in. That meant Ronnie and me carrying mattresses and box springs up those stairs, followed by a couple of dressers, and Laurie's drafting table. They took the two rooms at the back of the house.
Uncle Ray loaned me his pickup truck for my move. All I really had was a desk, a small chest of drawers, my record albums, and my clothes. I left my old single bed behind; I splurged and had a new queen-sized one delivered. It was my one extravagance.
I took the bedroom opposite the main bathroom, leaving the larger room for Rose. I was also on hand when she moved in, and helped Ron carry her stuff up the stairs.
- "Thanks, Ronnie. Thanks, Joe." she said. "I appreciate it. And it was very nice of you to leave me the bigger room. I would've flipped you for it."
Rose was just as I remembered her. She was a very nice girl, with a pretty face and a massive set of hooters. Unfortunately, she had a roll of fat around her waist, huge hips, a very big ass, and thick legs as well.
But that was just her appearance. Rose had a good sense of humour, and she was genuinely kind. There aren't enough people like that.
When my bed arrived, it took up most of the space in my little room. There was just enough left to squeeze in my dresser and my desk.
Within the very first few days, I discovered several great things about the new apartment. Right next to us, there was a little bakery. It smelled divine. I already knew that I was within easy walking distance of the garage - and best of all, my stepmother didn't live here. Dad came over to see the place - to make sure that I was okay, as he put it. I didn't have much to say to him.
Uncle Ray was quickly becoming the real father figure in my life.
- "I'm taking over the garage, Joe." he told me. "The old man is retiring, and he wants me to buy him out."
- "That's great!" I said. "Uh ... can you afford it?"
- "Why? You gonna offer me a loan?" he laughed. Not for the first time, I wished that my Dad could have been more like his younger brother.
- "Any chance of me making mechanic?" I asked.
- "Sit down, Joe." Ray got serious. "I
have
mechanics. And I can always get more. What I don't have is someone to help me run the office. Someone to keep the books, to help me with the paperwork and the business side."
- "You can just hire an accountant, Ray."
- "I need someone I can trust. 'Sides, accountants don't know a thing about fixin' cars. But you could handle both ends of the business."
- "I don't know anything about keeping accounts." I said.
- "You could ... if you went to college."
Ray knew that I was planning to go back to school. But I was going to take auto repair, so that I could become a licensed mechanic.
He suggested, instead, that I take business courses. "I can teach you how to fix cars." he said. "An' I will - if you help me out, too."
- "I don't know, Ray."
- "Look, Joe - I'm not gonna do this forever. Ten, twelve - fifteen years, tops.
Then
who do I sell this business to?"
I'm not totally stupid. "Me?"
Ray grabbed my nose with two fingers, leaving a huge grease mark on my face.
***
It was an incredible offer. Ray would pay my tuition, while I continued to work part-time at the garage. When I graduated - in two, or maybe three years - I would have a full-time position with him, and the opportunity to learn all aspects of the business.
And maybe ... a chance to have my own garage before I was 35 years old.
***
The apartment did come with minor drawbacks. One of them was that sound travelled.
I don't know whether Ron went to Laurie's room, or if she went to his; it didn't matter, because
both
of their beds squeaked. They were like fucking rabbits, the pair of them.
On occasion, they would get so carried away that the headboard on Ronnie's bed would smack into the wall, like the drumbeat in a disco tune. Thump, thump, thump ... if it wasn't that, then it was the squeaky springs serenade.
In the morning, Rose and I would get our coffees, avoid eye contact, and by unspoken agreement, neither of us would mention the sounds we'd been forced to listen to all night. We just pretended that it hadn't happened.
***
I had another problem, which was occupying most of my attention.
Sam.
The big question was 'Could I treat her as my girlfriend?'. Back in our day, the terms 'friends with benefits', or 'fuck buddies' were unknown.
I had her over, to see the new apartment. We christened my new bed, in fine style. Sam was passionate, and apparently happy as I was. She spread her legs wide, and then wrapped them around me as I drove my length into her.
Without a car, the only way I could get her home was by bus. I wasn't about to send her alone, late at night. That meant a 25-30 minute ride back to her house - after which I would have to wait for another bus back downtown. In total, it could take me over 1 1/2 hours to see her home.
Much easier, then, to have her stay over. She was 21, now. Her mother made no fuss if Sam said she was staying at a friend's. That way, she could sleep with me in my new bed. That meant going through several condoms, because I found it difficult to have a naked Sam in my bed, if I wasn't able to fuck her repeatedly.
There was nothing wrong with the springs on my bed, and I didn't have a headboard, so I don't think that we kept any of my roommates awake.
My problems began in the morning, when we went into the kitchen.
The moment she saw Ron, or Laurie, or even Rose, Sam would immediately switch to complete idiot mode. She would giggle, and say the most incredibly stupid things.
- "Are those real?" she asked Rose, pointing to her enormous boobs.
I apologized for that one, later. But I couldn't use the excuse of bad pills every time.
Sam apologized, too. She knew that she was crossing lines - almost every single time. She just didn't seem able to stop.
I took her out on a couple of occasions, even though the bus was still an issue. I only went out with her if it was the two of us - alone. Sam also invited me to her house - her sisters knew about us, so it was no big secret anymore.
I went - big mistake. It was nice to see Tanya, I suppose. She was quick-witted, and fun to banter with. But Sam was a silly, giggling mess. She tried to use me as a weapon in the competition with her sisters. It was pretty awful.
One night, we were out together, alone. We walked around the lake, stopping for coffees. She was perfectly relaxed with me. No giggling, no stupid remarks. I couldn't understand the difference. It was like night and day.
- "I know." she admitted. "I can't explain it. Maybe it's just ..."
- "Just what?"
- "Well ... you're so much nicer to me than anybody else has ever been."
Ouch.
***
College was a whole lot harder than I'd expected. It was difficult - painful, even, at times - to sit behind a desk again and listen to hour after hour of bullshit. Accounting was different: practical, but mind-numbing.
On the other hand, college was a whole lot easier than I'd expected. The tests weren't very challenging. Most of the assignments were just time-consuming, rather than difficult. Uncle Ray gave me all the part-time hours I wanted - as long as I kept ahead of homework and assignments.
The best part of that first semester, by far, was meeting Eli. He was a funny guy, with a refreshingly unique outlook.
- "My policy is simple: complete, brutal honesty, to the point of absurdity." he said.
He walked up to the hottest girl in our class, and told her - point blank: "I'd really like to have sex with you."
