The Erogenous Zone S01 E05 - Saint Niced

Twilight Zone-like music plays...

Narrator :

The traditions of Christmas are some of the oldest and most widely adopted celebrations of the year. At the heart of these traditions are love, peace on earth and goodwill towards all men, fueled by a spirit of giving.

But 42 year old Damon Harper sees the ability to Give as just another way to Take what he normally could not have and that means a trip to...the Erogenous Zone.

Twilight Zone-like music plays...

It started in July. It was one of those lovely sunny London afternoons and I was sitting on the deck of my flat enjoying the sounds of the city. Across the street and two floors below me, Cindy Lou was sunning herself in a bikini that made my heart race.

Cindy bloody Lou (who was not more than 22)! That Grinch guy had it right...send her back to bed and then stuff a tree up her chimney, if you know what I mean. She'd turned me down twice for a night out and thus I was left lustfully imagining what I'd do to her.

Ah the Grinch...now there's a classic literary role model for you. Stealing Christmas. Granted he went about it all wrong...you got to be smart about this stuff. If you're gonna nick Christmas you gotta go through existing channels. You don't just imitate The Man, you would actually have to...

Bloody hell! Wait a minute, wait a minute ladies and gents...I think I just hurt my brain! I got me an idea so good and crazy as it might just work. The Grinch got sacked because he tried to Take too much and that broke the system. He got sucker-punched in the heart and went all squishy. But if you use the system to Give and just happen to Get a little along the way you might be able to bend it without breaking.

See, the Grinch tried to steal All of Christmas. I don't need that. I just need to nick a bit o' that Christmas joy and funnel it down between me legs.

I've got 6 months to prepare. This is going to be brilliant!

Dec 24th. 23:00 GMT

I am SO ready for the fatman.

I dug deep into the lore of Mr. S. Claus for 6 months and found some remarkable facts about Santa. Did you know that he doesn't visit every home that gets a toy? Nope, there are just too many. Most gifts are delivered by magic and just appear, but Santa does handle the Special Cases. Those who were either So Nice or So Naughty that the delivery must be insured.

I spent six months being Really Naughty. I'll spare you the details, because that would be story in itself, but suffice to say it seems I excel at Bad Things.

Next interesting tidbit is that he, as an individual, has no magic at all. It's all the outfit. His Accoutrements, as it were. The Boots allow him to teleport anywhere and move silently (no chimney required...that was the only possible explanation 400 yrs ago and it stuck). The Coat and Pants allow him to change his shape (camouflage) and the Gloves will put anyone into sleepy forgetfulness. His Glasses allow him to know each person's name and history by glancing at them. The Bag is not some sort of wormhole to the Workshop, but a manufactory much like a mythical cornucopia...it produces whatever the bearer asks for. And finally the Cap. This is the real kicker. If you're wearing all the kit...and the Cap...anyone that sees you will instantly recognize and believe you are The Santa Claus.

Sweet setup, right? Nick his kit, and Clausio, the big SC, is just another naked little elf.

Now you might ask 'But Damon my mate...how could you possibly catch the fatman to steal his gear? It sounds near impossible and I'm sure people have tried everything before?'

Very true, very true. But as far as I can tell, most people have not cross checked their mythologies. You see Santa is an Elf. He's not just the Boss Elf. He's an actual Elvish breed. And that means that while he's immune to every know poison, drug and sleep inducer, he also can't stand the touch of cold iron. Not really part of any metals we use in normal life today. Cold iron is much to brittle for most modern uses, but it it cheap and easy to obtain from certain artisan craftsmen on Etsy.

Cold Iron filings in his milk and more baked into the cookies. If I've got the dosage right, he should be out for about 3 hours.

3 bloody hours...and I'm going to enjoy my Ho, Ho, Hos.

Dec 25th. 03:40 GMT

It Worked! It Worked! Ring the bloody Silver Bells it worked! He's out like a light and I'm putting on his gear as fast as I can. I instantly know how each thing works as soon as it's on...so cool! When I strip him of the coat and pants the fatman changes into a 3 ft high miniature pointy eared person.

Just another elf. I wonder if those bastards take turns? I tie him up with ribbon and put him under the tree until I get back. Then I instruct the suit to bulk me up...make me look older but not old. A shorter beard with just a trace of grey. Custom tailoring to the suit. Damn, I look fucking fit!

Time to put the 'X' back in Xmas!

Dec 25th. 03:55 GMT

Ho One...April Morrow. Mother of two, wife to a bag of shit (not just a piece) fuckup named Dexter. Fit as a fiddle...and capital S stacked up top. By the way, do you know that 'fit as a fiddle' comes from comparing the shape of a woman to that of a violin? Merry Christmas to You.

At a party a few months back I happen to overhear a tipsy Mrs. Morrow telling her best friend something juicy and it set my imagination on fire. So I teleport to her bedroom to commence with the giving.

April and her husband are sleeping back-to-back in their queen bed. I spend a few minutes examining her with the Santa Specs (it sounds cooler than Glasses), and when I'm ready I reach out and gently stroke her auburn hair.

"April" I whisper.

"Go to sleep Dex." She mumbles.

"April" I say again, stroking her cheek. Her eyes crack open and she sits up with a start.

"Who the fu...what? How? Santa?"

"Yes April. It's me. Merry Christmas"

"I don't understand. Do you even exist? You don't look like I expected...you're, well, younger. And slimmer. I'm sorry...that's a lot of questions, I'm just..."

"I get it dear. You know it's really me...and much as I'd like to explain everything to you, it's a pretty busy night for me." I smile gently.

"Of course! I'm sorry...uh, can I get you something? A cookie?" She immediately looks sheepish after asking what she thinks is a silly question.

"No. I just need to deliver a gift. You've been especially Nice this year!"

"I...thank you. I really did try."

"This toy is for you." I reach into the bag and pull out a J-shaped pink vibrator with a pretty red and white stripped bow.

"Um...what is this?"

"Well, a few months back you told your best friend 'I wish sucking that bastards dick somehow made me feel good.'. I'm here to help with that."

"How did you know that!?!"

"April, please. I see you when you're sleeping...etc."

"Oh, but how is this going to help?"

"Stand up and I'll show you."

She gently lifts the covers off and stands up. She's wearing a holly print sleep shirt that hangs down just to mid thigh. Lean, toned thighs at that. The look of her went straight to my south pole.

I took the vibrator from her hand and removed the ribbon, wrapping it around her neck like a choker. It makes her smile and giggle. Then I unbuttoned the top button of her gown.

"Stop!" She said in a hushed whisper. "What are you doing?". She playfully bats at my hand.

"Trust me, April. I'm Santa. I won't hurt you."

"I just...". She stopped as I kissed where the top button had been. Undoing the next, and placing the next kiss between her breasts. The next button, and my whiskers tickled her belly making her giggle again, which turned to a sharp inhale as I slid my tongue down over her belly. The last button undone, I rubbed my nose in her trimmed bush. April doesn't wear panties to bed.

I love a woman who doesn't wear panties to bed.

"You smell SO good." A few gentle strokes of my tongue over her arousing pussy is all that's needed to warm her up a little more.

Standing up, I bring the vibrator to her mouth...it has a bulbous head at one end, and a flat area the size of my fingernail at the other. I run the bulbous head over her lips until she opens her mouth and wets it. It's this part that I then gently slid into her wet pussy. The flat area I settle over her clit...a gentle squeeze tightens to hold it in place.

I take out a remote control and press a button to start the vibrator on it's lowest setting.

"Oh My!" April steps back startled and her hands fly to her legs. "Oh.my...that's...ah!"

Gentle pressure on her shoulders guides her down as I unlace my trousers releasing my cock. She looks up at me confusedly. I brush her lips with the tip of my cock and at the same time slide my finger up the intensity control for the bulbous end of the vibrator just a little bit.

She closes her eyes and gently takes the head of my cock into her mouth. Another tick up on the intensity. She takes my cock out of her mouth and I drop the intensity back down.

Of course, I had the suit make my Santa Cock impressive, but it's not a monster. She smiles up at me...a one hand grip on the base of my cock with several inches still exposed and whispers "You taste like a candy cane!"

"Because I know they are your favorite." Which the Santa Specs told me. "I'm not going to touch you, April...but you are going to make yourself cum by sucking my cock off. The deeper and longer you take it, the faster the vibrator will hum."

April eyes light up. She bobs her head down...not very deep...and quickly back up. I spike the intensity up, then down. She pushes as much of my cock as she can into her mouth and I feel her muffled moans as the vibrator responds.

She immediately sets at it with gusto. She's dropped her hand to squeeze her own breast and she's trying to get the newly exposed inches down her throat...trying to push the vibrator higher. It's frantic...she seems to just be enjoying the sensations.

"I have another surprise for you. Stop swallowing, April. Get Santa's cock nice and wet."

A few bobs of not swallowing and there are drips of saliva coating my cock and falling on her chest. I push a second button and the flat end of the vibrator starts humming against her clit.

April about looses her mind. She starts rapidly and almost savagely sucking and stroking my cock. She rubs it, soaking wet, all over her face before sucking it back into her mouth again. I am pulsing the vibrators matching her rhythm as close as I can.

Dexter gives a snorish snort and turns over in the bed. April freezes, eyes wide with fear staring up at me and about three quarters of my cock still in her mouth. I smile devilishly and push the vibrator higher. She's forced to endure it for a good 15 seconds before deciding that Dexter is still asleep and pulling off, gasping for air and sanity.

She gives me a long lick up my shaft and pops my cock back in her mouth, but there's a tempo change...her movements have a purpose now. She takes it deep and long, then pulls it out and sucks really hard on just the tip. She keeps this rhythm up and it's almost maddening, but I know she's bringing herself closer and closer to her orgasm.

I'm getting close too...there's a chance that we just might be close enough together.

"April...I'm so close."

As if that's what she was waiting for, she starts to take me long and deep...over and over....until finally I feel her head, throat and the rest of her body start shaking violently. That sends me over the edge and my first jet fires in her mouth before she pulls my cock out and the rest sprays over her already wet chest.

She stands up, grabbing and absently stroking my cock with a languid and peaceful smile on her face. "Sugar Plum cum? Are you serious?"

I drop the remote into her other hand. "Merry X-Mas April."

Dec 25th. 04:25 GMT

My next Ho is the neighborhood tart. 19yr old Sarah Wall. Short skirts and knee high sock are her trademark and while many boys all claim to have had her, there are an equal number who claim she shut them out and is still a virgin. I'm going to find out.

I teleport to her room. She's lying face down on her bed with the covers cast aside, wearing a tee shirt and hot pink thong undies.

I love a woman who wears a thong to bed.

The Santa Specs show me the truth right off. She's a total slut. They also give me and idea for a much better toy than I had planned.

I sit on the bed and caress her ass. "Wake up Sarah."

"Mmmm...who are you" she said drowsily. I think she might be drunk, or high.

"It's Santa, Sarah. I brought you a toy."

"I'm a little old for toys, dude." She scoffs.

"Are you sure?" I show her a silver anal plug with an emerald gem cloverleaf on the handle. "You still like clovers, don't you?" I give her ass cheek a squeeze.

"Santa! If I knew elves made that kind of toy I'd have written you a letter that would make Mrs. Claus jealous!"

"May I?" I ask.

"Please do!" She lifts up to hands and knees on her bed, but I push her head and chest back down to her pillow leaving her ass lifted.

Slipping behind her, I grab the two perfect ass cheeks and spread them wide. Her anus is tight and pink and SO inviting. Just below is her smoothly shaven pussy just starting to open with excitement. I use my forefingers to pull her anus wider and my thumbs to do the same with her pussy. It's difficult to keep from diving right in.

I give a little lick just between the two. My beard tickles her outer lips and my fingers trace her anus.

Sarah is moaning and giggling and pressing her hips back trying to speed things up and I'm happy to accommodate her. The sweet smell of her pussy and the earthy ass is filling my nostrils. I start lavishing broad slow strokes of my tongue over her pussy. Not penetrating, just lathing the outer lips in warm wet gentle pressure. Each stroke gets a little closer to the puckered bud of her anus...but each one stops just short.

Her moans increase. Occasionally punctuated with a "oh fuck" or "right there" or little gasps of "ugh".

I slide my hands down the back of her thigh and really press deeply into her pussy. My lips are inside hers as the soft roughness of my whiskers provide extra stimulation. Her hips try to lift higher as my jaw is working and my chin is rubbing her clit. My tongue is circling the tight entrance to her pussy and sneaking in and out every couple of circles.

I had the Suit make my tongue a little longer, thicker and MUCH more prehensile. When it slips inside her I'm able to press it against her G-spot. It's driving her crazy.

I can tell she's almost ready to cum, but I'm not quite ready to let her yet so I pull myself upright and give her round ass a sharp slap!

Sarah yelps and flattens herself on the bed in reaction. She looks back at me with a wicked smile and grinds her hips into the bed. I get to watch her ass flex as she fucks her bed and its so hot that I grab her hips and pull her back up onto her knees.

She's open and beautiful and I am very tempted to pull out my cock and fuck her but that's not the point of this gift, so instead I slowly slide the butt plug into her wet, wet pussy.

"Hold this in, or I'll take it back." I tell her.

"I...fuck...I'll try" she pants. Her hips are constantly moving, constantly trying to draw me in and its working. She arches her back and tucks her tailbone, then drops her belly and shows me more of her pussy. Those same movements would make me cum if my cock were inside her right now. Gotta put an end to that distraction fast!

Another slap on the ass. "Sit still." I tell her. Her hips slow but never completely stop. I see her snake a hand between her legs and rub the jeweled end of the plug. Maybe keeping it in, maybe just enjoying the movement. Another moan escapes her. Sexy minx. I bring both her arms together at the small of her back and press her face back down into the bed.

"I." spank "Said" spank "Sit" spank "Still!" spank. Her hips are trembling and she literally has part of her blanket between her teeth stifling a scream. Still holding her hands, I finally lower my head to her ass. My tongue makes two circles around her anus before forcing its way in. Her hips are lifting up into me as I tongue fuck her ass.

Time for the finale.

I let go of her hands and slowly extract the plug from her pussy, ignoring her "nonono...ah!" and keeping it in contact with her skin the whole time I slide it up to her anus.

"Are you ready for Santa's toy, Sarah?"

"Yessss...pleasepleaseplease...OH...Oh Shit! Fuck!" as I slid the plug in.

When it's fully settled, I guide Sarah over onto her back and pull her hips up to my chest. Jackknifing her legs over her head so her pussy is right under my chin and her shoulders are the only thing on the bed.

Then I start making love to her pussy with my mouth and tongue. Burying my mouth in her hot cunt...pushing my tongue deep inside, around, in and out. Pulling back and rubbing my fingers softly over her clit before bringing my tongue back again. Slowly, gently but insistently...firmly holding her hips captive. With all of my face, lips, whiskers, tongue and fingers providing sensation, nothing needs to move quickly.

Her arms tried to reach my head, but failing that are beating the bed in delicious agony. Her hips are making futile attempts for freedom and bucking against my chest. Her voice is pleading "faster...please...ohgod thats sooooo good."

I don't know how many orgasms she's had, or if she's had any yet, but there's a big one coming and I can feel it. I continue making love to her pussy with my mouth and when I feel she's on the edge I reach under and start to pull on the base of the plug.

As the toy pulls her asshole wider, Sarah starts to cum. Hard. Screamingly, leg twitchingly, thighs clamped down on my head-ingly hard.

I ride out her orgasm with her, sneaking in a little extra lick or kiss when I feel her riding an aftershock. Eventually she relaxes enough that I can lay her back down on the bed.

Like the poem says...'Then laying her butt plug aside of her rose, and giving a nod up the chimney he goes'...or something like that.

"Merry X-mas, Sarah.'

Dec 25th. 05:19 GMT

Time for best toy delivery of all. Cindy Lou Hoover. The girl who started this all.

Owner of the most spectacular tits this side of...well, anywhere. They are Cs, perfectly pert with lovely nipples. The best part is that you can tell she loves them. Her trademarks are low cut blouses and push up brassieres.

She must have had a run in with Santa in the past...the Specs inform me that she actually believes in Santa...right now...at age 22.

They also let me know she writes him (me?) every year. At age 14 she asked Santa to 'convince me mum to let me pierce my nips.' At 20, she asked Santa to be her boyfriend since 'all the regular lads are total shits'. This year, she asked for something 'sexy and obvious, but not obvious'. I guess Santa doesn't get the easy asks, does he? Fortunately, I think I have just the thing.

She's asleep on her couch, across from her fireplace. She's wearing a thin tank tee top and bikini panties.

I love a woman who wears...alright...I got a thing for sleepwear. Is that so bad?

There's a note next to the cookie plate that say's "Wake Me!"

I ponder my plan for Mr Hoover's daughter, and pulled from my sack a cup of cold water. Hold it! No rhyming...even if it is an homage!

"My sweet little tot" I whispered in her ear.

Her eyes opened sleepily, then with sudden brightness "Santy Claus! You're here!" She jumped up and grabbed me in a big bear hug. "You look so different!".

"I was the Santa you needed back then, Cindy Lou. Older Cindy needs a different one." She pulled back a bit and regarded me with different eyes. Adult eyes.

"Did you bring me something?" She asked with a mischievous look.