Part 1:
After 20 years of a great marriage, my wife, Kim, was paralyzed from the waist down from a tragic auto accident that killed several people. The other driver was at fault resulting in a large financial settlement that allowed me to leave my Senior Management Position at a large manufacturing company to care for her full time. We had saved and invested wisely, and the settlement put me in a good position to focus on her care.
We worked on Kim's rehab for nine months and were finally at the point where I was able to take her home. She had built enough strength to be mobile in her custom built wheelchair and she was anxious to leave the rehab facility. We had spent the money needed to make our home accommodated to her needs and I was, as they say, ready to rock and roll in taking care of her.
The big day finally happened and we got home. The house renovations allowed Kim to move freely about in her wheelchair without any problems, so we settled in and re-started our lives together.
Our daily routine focused on Kim's needs. It started with me getting her up, bathed, dressed and I'd make her breakfast. We'd work on her physical therapy, have lunch, then I'd get her ready for her nap. While she slept I would prepare dinner, pick up the house or do laundry, take care of yard work, then we'd eat, watch a little TV and then I'd help get Kim ready for bed. It was a tough schedule, but for better or worse, right? As time moved Kim continued to get stronger.
Six months after Kim got home, I'd been out grocery shopping. As I put the store items away, she said to me, "We need to talk."
We are always talking, but I said, "Okay."
"I've been thinking. You've given up everything for the last year and a half to care for me and that's not fair."
I said, "Doesn't matter, I'm good taking care of you and I'm going to keep doing it. I want you exactly where you are, home, so please don't worry about me. I'm good."
Kim replied, "I know that, but your complete attention to me is starting to make me feel guilty. And I know you have needs and wants that I can no longer take care of."
We kept going round and around with this conversation. I had no problem with our situation and told her so. Kim argued I needed some relief. Maybe I agreed with her, but I was going to live up to taking care of Kim until she was gone, or I was.
We continued having this discussion over the course of several weeks, but one day Kim said to me, "I have an announcement."
I sat down and reluctantly said, "Announcement about what?"
Kim said, "I've decided to set up interviews with some people that can help out. I'm going to hire a live in nurse/caregiver. I've done my research and talked to a recruiter that specializes in this."
I argued again for the hundredth time I didn't need help, but once Kim had her mind made up, she was like a train rolling down the track-unstoppable. She said that we could have the guest room and bath on the opposite side of our house set up for whoever we hired. Or we could use the bedrooms and bath in the basement. We would provide room and board and a small salary. As we discussed her plan I thought it was something that might happen down the line in several months, if not a year. So I decided to not worry about it.
Then the bombshell dropped...
Kim told me, "On Monday I've arranged for four interviews. Would you like to participate?"
I had run out of arguments, so I reluctantly agreed. As I started to think about having a live in caregiver helping Kim I became more comfortable with the idea. I had willingly put my agenda on the back burner and this would give me a little time on my own. If things didn't work out having someone else in the house, I had no problem helping Kim the way we had already done it. I didn't realize how this was going to change our lives.
Monday arrived. Kim said, "The interviews will be spaced two hours apart. What you'll do is give them a tour of the house and show them where their space would be. You can also let them know our routine and get a feeling if they could be a fit for you. I'll let them know my expectations and interview them. Does that work for you?"
I told her it sounded like a good plan, but I didn't know what to expect.
First up was a middle aged, forty something Latina named Dora. She was somewhat reserved, but as the three of us chatted she relaxed and opened up. She was a registered caregiver, not quite a nurse, but with plenty of experience. She was, as I came to find out about all the candidates, single and living alone. Dora saw this as an opportunity to get away from the crushing burden that Covid had imposed on medical and caregiver personnel. She hoped to save a little money too. Dora was attractive in an understated way with jet black hair with streaks of white. A petite, yet fully curved body and, once she had relaxed, a radiant smile. When she left we actually hugged to say good by.
We next interviewed a thirty something woman named Alice. We repeated the interview process as we had done with Dora and found we were going to have a difficult time making our choice. Alice was an attractive redhead with a slim, athletic, freckled body. She was had an outgoing personality and she and Kim were soon talking and giggling like schoolgirls.
Next was an Asian woman, Thai by birth, named Asa. She was attractive in a way all Asian women are; petite, long dark hair, beautiful olive skin and a mysterious aura about her. Her age? We never really found out, but she was, by our estimate, in her early 40's. She too was a fully registered nurse. And she too was looking to escape the medical environment created by Covid. Asa told us they were severely understaffed and, in her opinion, under appreciated. She remained a bit more reserved throughout our conversations, but she was certainly qualified. As the our meeting with her ended, she said she really hoped this could work out for her and us.
The final candidate was...a no show. She called and left a message saying that when her current employer found out she might leave, she has been given a substantial pay increase. She apologized for her absence and left us to decide which woman would work best.
By now it was late in the afternoon. I made us a quick, light dinner and while we were eating we discussed the women we had interviewed.
Kim: "Who did you like the best?"
Me: "Wrong question, who did YOU like the best?"
We talked about Dora, Alice and Asa in order and after an hour we hadn't decided anything because they were all excellent candidates. Kim did bring up a commonality among the three of them: they were tired of working in an crowded environment and it seemed they all needed a place to call home. A secure living situation that they each probably couldn't afford on their own.
Kim suddenly had an idea. She said, "Let's offer the job to all of them. We have the guest room on this level of the house and three more in our finished basement."
I said, "Are you crazy? You want to invite three women to share our house? Would they even get along? How could we possibly pay each of them a living wage? We're financially set, but we need to be smart about how we spend. How would this work?"
Kim replied, "I like all three of them. I can tell they are hurting professionally and I think financially. They might need our help as much or more than I need their help. All our friends have basically abandoned us, so I'm not going to worry about what people think. I say we offer them a safe place to live. We challenge them to set up a schedule that helps you and me, but we let them know it's without pay. They share in the duties of the house and helping me. And if they want to work outside of the house it okay as long as our needs are met first."
I thought Kim was crazy, fucking nuts, but she had this idea in her head and nothing I could say would derail her thinking. I couldn't imagine that they would go for Kim's offer, so I agreed that she could float the idea to the three of them. One thing in Kim's favor was that housing costs in our area was skyrocketing. The cost of living alone had to be crushing.
The next day Kim contacted the three women and invited them over for dinner. She told each lady she had a proposal and wanted to present it to them face to face. They probably thought it would be an individual offer and so they were quite surprised when they all showed up at our house at the same time.
Kim introduced everyone while I was busy getting drinks for them. Kim and I had decided that she would detail the offer we were going to make. After a brief "social" hour Kim started talking to them together as a group.
"My husband and I were impressed by all of you and know that any one of you individually would meet our needs. But we are thinking of your needs as well. We know, and you know, that you want to escape the rat race of your jobs and have a stable, affordable place to live safely without the constant stress of making ends meet. We'd like to offer our home to each of you in exchange for helping me care for myself and helping maintain our home. We would challenge you to set a schedule that does that. Continue to work away from here, that's okay, providing our needs are met and the schedule is worked out to everyone's satisfaction."
As I watched the faces of the three women, I saw surprise, confusion and then calculation.
Asa asked, "Where would we stay?"
Kim said, "We have four extra bedrooms and baths. The three of you could work it out or we could do a lottery to decide."
Dora said, "When I was recruited to interview with you, the attraction was room AND board. How would that work now?"