When I opened my eyes I was sitting in a grassy field. It was night and there was a campfire off to my right. Several men were sitting near me. I did not recognize any of them. I looked down at my hands and I was holding greasy playing cards. All of the men were holding cards. They were all looking at me. No one said a word. I looked at the cards in my hand. I was holding a pair of kings. There were four cards turned up on the ground in the middle of the circle. We were playing poker. How did I get into a poker game? I sucked at poker. I looked at the cards on the ground again. There was a pair of twos, a king and an ace.
Everyone was staring at me intently. They were waiting for me to decide. I had to bet or get out. The fire was radiating a fierce heat and I was sweating profusely. I reached into my pocket and pulled out a brass key on a chain. I threw it into the middle of the circle. I noticed there was no money in the pot, only objects. There was a glass vial and a silver blade along with a wood cross and a gleaming ruby. After I threw in the key, the man directly across from me looked at his cards and threw into the pot a small blue cloth bag. There was something in the bag. The bag was familiar to me and I was suddenly afraid. Whatever was in the bag was moving.
The man to my right was dealing, and he put down the last card. It was another king. I knew that I had won, but I was filled with dread. I did not want to win. I did not want whatever was in that blue bag. The man across from me lay down his cards. He was showing two aces. He had a full house, aces over kings. He was smiling; sure that he had won the pot. He reached down to pick up the brass key. I was furiously thinking, trying to decide what to do. I had him beat, but I could not make myself show my cards. The words were choked in my throat. I was trying to talk but I was terrified. I finally sat up and screamed "NO!"
That was when I woke up. I was back in the BMW and Loren was driving. It was stiflingly hot in the car.
"What is it baby?" She was looking at me with concern.
I was covered in sweat. I was trying to piece together where I was and what had just happened. It was coming back to me slowly. I sat up and looked at Loren.
"It's okay baby, I just had a bad dream. Where are we?" I lowered my window. The air conditioning was not working again.
"Baby I am really worried about you." She said, reaching over and putting her hand on my knee. "I could barely get you back into the car. You were so out of it."
I sat and looked out to my right for a few seconds. We were in the mountains now. The embankment rose steeply on her side of the car and dropped off just as severely on my side. I knew that we must be close to Shasta.
I remembered now stopping on the gravel road...making love to Loren...laying on the dried, brown grass. I did not remember getting back into the car. Then I remembered the dream.
"Baby where is the blue bag?" I asked without turning to look at her.
At first I thought that she didn't hear me, so I turned to her to ask again.
Before I could ask again she answered "It's in the glove box. I put it there last night. Don't you remember?"
I did remember, but the dream was stuck in my head.
I opened the glove box and there it was. I again remembered my dream, how the bag moved. I closed the compartment carefully. Shasta could not come soon enough.
As if in answer to my unspoken wish I saw a sign that announced that the exit for Mt. Shasta was in two miles. I sat up and peeled off my t shirt. It was damp and smelled exactly like you would expect a shirt to smell after wearing it for 24 hours. I threw it into the back seat. I looked over at Loren. Her window was up and she now was now wearing a pair of my running shorts along with my gray shirt. She looked dry and comfortable.
"How can you stand this heat?" I asked
"I like it." She said with a smile. "It reminds me of Georgia."
If I never saw Georgia again it would still be too soon, I thought to myself. Too many conservative rednecks, asshole yuppies and way too much greasy food. My old life was in Atlanta and I preferred that it stay there. Whatever was going to happen to Loren and I, it had to be better than the hypocrisy that we left back east.
Loren started to slow the car and put on her right turn signal. She was a very careful driver and it drove me crazy sometimes.
"Turn right at the top of the ramp." I directed.
We drove for about a mile past familiar old motels and dive food joints. We passed Mi Casa and I felt a rumbling in my stomach. How long had it been since we last ate a meal? I couldn't remember.
"Coming up on the left is the Black Bear Inn." I said pointing. Pull in there and drive around behind the office.
We came around a bend in the highway and there it was, just as old and wonderfully dreadful as I remembered. I actually smiled recalling the last time I was there.
Loren put on her turn signal even though we had not seen another car since exiting, slowed down to a crawl and inched her way through the front parking lot, past the office and pulled around behind it. She pulled up to where the busted pavement stopped and put the car in park. She turned off the engine and we both looked at each other. We had finally made it, but there was still so much to do.
I checked in under the name Toby Bones. It was a name that I remembered from back in elementary school. They had no problem taking cash which was good since I would not be able to use a credit card for a while. The clerk was a young woman with rings through her lower lip and a diamond stud in her nose. She had tattoos on her eyelids so that it looked like her eyes were open when she blinked them closed. Her hair was black and purple and was cut shorter on the left than it was on the right. Somehow this all made perfect sense in Shasta. She handed me a key...a real key, not a plastic card, after I handed her seventy dollars.
I took the key with a slight feeling of unease. Hadn't there been a key in my dream? I was sure that there had been. The dream was becoming fuzzy and translucent, the way dreams often times do. I could remember objects on the ground but not why they were there. I could remember a feeling of helplessness and terror but not what had caused it. I tried to shake it off but the feeling of unease settled into my stomach. It felt like it was going to hang around for a while. Maybe that was for the best. I was going to have to stay sharp for our meeting with Chloe this afternoon.
I walked back to the car and found Loren at the rear of the car with the trunk open. I walked to her and handed her the key.