Author's Note:
May I present the epilogue to the High Stakes, Hard Sell series. Thank you to all my readers for your support and feedback, and to the author Karaline who did such fantastic editing for the series. I'm very grateful to everyone.
*****
Epilogue
Jane gazed out the passenger seat window at the spring scenery as Mike steered her car north up the 400 and away from Toronto. It was a lovely Friday in early May; the snow had disappeared and the sun was shining bright and hot. In the back seat Nessa was reading aloud to herself from a Little Mermaid picture book.
Jane should have been enjoying herself; she'd taken a few days off for the trip, the weather promised to be lovely and the landscapes along the route to Elliot Lake were some of the loveliest that nature had to offer. The man she loved was in the driver's seat next to her, Nessa was her typical well-behaved self. The multiple injuries she'd sustained back in February and March had healed and she was pain-free. In theory, all the ingredients for a wonderful vacation were present.
Instead, she felt like coming apart. She tried to keep her demeanor calm and pleasant to avoid alerting Mike but it was a struggle even for the normally poised and composed salesperson.
She took another swig of flat ginger ale, hoping it would calm her upset stomach. She suspected the nausea was due to biology more than stress.
Going to see her estranged mother for the first time in fifteen years was anxiety-inducing on its own, but Jane could have handled it. The fact that her older sister would be there too - the first time Jane had seen her since their falling out several weeks ago - added to the stress, but even that wouldn't have been too much. She thrived on high pressure; she'd already rehearsed what she wanted to say to both of them.
But throw in the surprise pregnancy and it was all she could do stop herself from screaming or crying. Or both.
She'd taken the home pregnancy test yesterday after a week of on-again off-again nausea. It came out positive. She'd run out and bought a second one; surely false positives happened all the time, right? Positive, again. She'd spent the evening freaking out, overcome by the enormity of it. Even after a sleepless night she wasn't any closer to a plan, or even putting her scattered thoughts into order.
And how to tell Mike? How would he react? She trusted him - she HAD to trust him. 'Trust Mike' had become her mantra since she'd discovered the secret of beating the old lady's curse. But Jane was a planner, and she wanted to have at least a semblance of a plan before she dropped the bomb on him.
She marveled again at her woeful luck. In twenty-nine years she'd had unprotected sex once. Once! One evening of passionate, wonderful, bareback sex with Mike. She'd expected to die soon afterward so what would be the harm in dropping her guard just once?
She swore silently. It turned out that 'expecting to die soon' wasn't a good form of birth control.
Was this the old lady's curse, lashing out at her in its death throes, inflicting one last indignity? A baby couldn't be a curse, surely? Babies were always blessings, though sometimes well-disguised, right?
Right?
The nausea wasn't going away.
"Could we pull off in Vaughan?" she asked.
"We just got on the highway. You want to pull off already?"
"Isn't that what I just said?" she snapped, then regretted her tone but didn't apologize.
Mike glanced over at her briefly, his expression puzzled. "Okay, we'll stop in Vaughan."
"Can we have McDonald's?" Nessa asked from the back seat.
"We just had breakfast an hour ago," he said.
"But I want a Happy Meal."
"You don't need a Happy Meal."
*
Kneeling over a public toilet in a McDonald's washroom wasn't the way Jane had envisioned spending the first part of her trip, but after ten minutes of retching she started to feel a little better. Hopefully the morning sickness would taper off soon. It was called 'morning' sickness for a reason, right?
She splashed water on her face at the sink, then looked at her haggard expression in the mirror, praying it was the terrible lighting that made her look like a fifty-year-old who hadn't slept in a week.
How to tell Mike?
"Mike, I'm pregnant, and I'm sure it's yours." The direct approach. The bombshell.
"Do you think Nessa would want a younger brother or sister?" The reach-him-through-Nessa approach had worked before. It would let her ease into the heavy stuff.
"Houston, we have a problem..." Humour. Break up the tension. Start things off with a smile.
Jane groaned, closed her eyes and breathed deeply.
It was pointless. He wouldn't want another child. He was just starting a new career as a junior event promoter on the fighting circuit. The learning curve was steep - busy days and long nights. Between that and Nessa, he had his hands full already. He and Jane weren't even discussing marriage yet - it was damn sure a baby wasn't in the script.
Or...maybe he'd be thrilled? He was so good with Nessa. Fatherhood seemed to suit him. He had the temperament for it and all the soft skills. This was a chance to have a child that was 'his'. A chance to experience parenthood right from the very start. And this time he wouldn't have to go it alone - Jane would be there with him, sharing the load.
...Assuming SHE wanted the baby! She had an amazing career with a bright future. She wasn't even thirty yet - WAY too young to be thinking about settling down. The possibility of actually carrying, delivering and then raising a baby seemed so overwhelming that Jane didn't know how to deconstruct it into pieces she could think about in a reasonable way. She knew she should make her choice before getting Mike's input. Or...would Mike's opinion somehow make her own decision easier? It was impossible to know the right approach.
Ironically, the perfect person to ask for advice would have been her sister Betty. She'd know all sorts of psychological tricks to help her sort out her feelings and thoughts on the matter. But the two of them weren't on speaking terms, and in any case Betty was hardly objective where Mike was concerned.
No, this was Jane's decision, and hers alone. Or...maybe a decision for her and Mike together? Damn it!
She opened her eyes and shook her head slowly. She had to tell him. Soon.
Trust Mike...trust Mike.
*
Jane returned to the table to find Mike sitting next to a partially-eaten Happy Meal. Nessa had vanished into the network of tunnels and slides in the play area.
"I don't think she's going to finish her fries," he offered.
She grabbed one and savoured the salt and grease. "Thanks. And sorry for earlier. I've been feeling a little queasy today."
"Not too late to cancel the trip. Maybe you're coming down with something."
