There's an old adage. One man asks another, "What would you do if you found your wife with another man?" and the other responds, "Ignore it, congratulate them, or join in, depending on the circumstances."
***
One night Mary asked me, "What are we doing Saturday night?" She knew very well, my schedule was posted on the refrigerator; I was a manager at Best Buy.
"I'm working, what are you doing?" I assumed she had an ulterior motive, and this was her way of breaking it gently. I was right.
"Well, James called, asked if we could get together. We haven't seen him in a couple of months."
I knew Mary and James had something special, I could cooperate with that. "So, how about this," I suggested. "Why don't the two of you go on a date?"
"You sure?" Mary didn't often solo, but . . .
"Why not? I don't mind, have a good time."
"Okay."
Saturday night as I puttered around the store, waiting for the magic moment of 9:00 to roll around and we could lock the doors, I realized my wife was meeting with her special lover, that they'd be flirting and kissing. Perhaps already they were locked nakedly in each other's arms. The thought never left the back of my mind, but because we were experienced in swinging I was able to concentrate on supervising the store.
The closing went smoother than usual, I was able to turn off the lights of the store early. It was just about ten when I got home, Mary's car was parked on the street as normal, when I walked in the house they were on the couch in the living room. Apparently, they'd arrived not fifteen minutes earlier, they still had most of their clothes on, I joined them. Until nearly midnight the two of us made love with Mary, she was a very satisfied woman when James said his goodnight.
As we were preparing for bed, Mary said, "Were you surprised?"
"A little. I figured you'd go over to his place."
"He didn't want to. He wanted to see what would happen when you walked in on us. If you'd given us another fifteen minutes, we'd have been doing it when you got home. How would you feel about that?"
"With James? I wouldn't have minded, you two can't keep your hands off each other! But I wonder. If I hadn't been expecting you to be with him, how would I have felt? Don't know. And what if it had been someone unexpected? If it was somebody I didn't know. That could get interesting."
But it wasn't going to happen, I knew. Mary had set up her rule long ago, kept it religiously with my agreement: she would always inform me in advance of her sexual liaisons, get my 'permission.' (If she had a hankering to give herself to another man, I rarely objected. We'd opened up our marriage years before, and who Mary slept with was her decision, not mine.)