Bugfixing

Note: This brief story was written entirely as part of a live chat. The person who inspired it... you know who you are.

*

I had forgotten I had a meeting that day when you offered to come over and I decided to work from home. In fact, I hadn't really been working at all, and we had already started to fool around a bit when my phone rang. My boss wanted to know if I would be joining them for the bugfix meeting.

I couldn't find my pants. "Fuck it." On with the shirt. Baseball cap to hide the tousled hair. Sit at the desk and aim the webcam, and hit "present meeting". I was walking everyone through a few suspect sections of the code when I felt you touch me the first time. I yelped and started a little. Glancing at the screen, everyone was looking at me curiously.

"Oh. I forgot the cat was under the table and it just pounced on my shoelaces" Everyone nodded and we got back to it.

But so did you. I could feel you licking and nibbling at my cock and balls. I focused, trying hard to concentrate on my meeting rather than the glorious feeling of your mouth on my body. I got to the part where I finished explaining what I thought was wrong with our system and handed it over to the network guy. As he droned on, I leaned back a little and took a deep breath.

Big mistake.

You leaned forward, and in order to hide your head from appearing I scooted forward a bit and the combination of the two shoved me down your throat unexpectedly (for me, at least. You seem to have done that on purpose!)

"Ooooohhhh whaaaaaatttTTT!!!" I moaned.

Again everyone stopped and looked at me. I frantically looked at the screen for context. OK, he was presenting the SSL protocols. I can do this.

"I can't BELIEVE you're on TLS1.0!"

They looked at each other.

"Guys, you don't think that having the latest TLS1.2, or at LEAST 1.1, is a good idea?"

I continued my little tirade, trying to act like that was the reason I was agitated. Meanwhile, you started a regular bobbing motion.

I buried my head in my hands in an exasperated gesture, to hide the look on my face. They all looked at each other. Joe said, "Look... I agree with you... but I don't think it has anything to do with THIS bug."

I sighed dramatically. "You're probably right, of course. I just get so worked up over bad SECURITY PRINCIPLES!"

the last bit came out as a startled shout. I didn't realize you could reach that spot with your tongue while your mouth was on me like that.

We moved on. We pulled up the code and analyzed the network stacks. Rather, they did. I muttered noncommittal noises of assent when everyone else did and dissent when everyone else did too. You kept switching up, trying to get more out of me, but I was focused (on not screaming. No idea what the code does)

Suddenly, you pulled your head off me, paused a second, and slammed your head between my legs, tongue darting out to reach my rear.

"GUWARGHH!" I shouted aloud.

Everyone stopped again. "Now what?" demanded Mark irritably.

"I... hit my leg on the table... because.... I.... um...." There was no blood in my brain.

Joe chimed in, "Did you see it too?"

"Um.... yea... right?" I managed. Now that you had me off balance, you were aggressively fingering my rear and sucking my cock and flicking my testicles all at once. The stimulation was intense, and I couldn't even lean forward properly.

"Scroll back!" called Joe. We scrolled back a screen or two.

But you weren't having any of it. You redoubled your efforts. I had to grip the table ledge to keep from visibly rocking.

"There. Gil, is THIS the problem?"

I couldn't even see. My eyes were blurring. "Um.... YES! OH YES! THERE'S A CORNER CASE! THE BOOOLLLLEAAAAAN LOGGIC IS REVEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRssssssssseeeddd......"

I came like a fire hose. Some in your mouth and some on your face and a lot on my legs and a bunch on the bottom of my desk.

Everyone was silent for a minute. Then Mark said, "What the hell?"

But before he could go any farther, Joe said, "Wait, I see it too! Yea, guys, it should be less-than-or-equal, not less-than! This will always drop the last packet! Good catch G!"

My eyes were starting to refocus and I could see Mark looking dubiously into the camera. "Geez, when the guys said you get worked up about bugs they weren't kidding."

I looked straight at the camera and deadpanned, "Yea, I really like to just pour myself into my passions."