White Trash Livin' And Fuckin' Parody
My Family in This Episode :
My Mama Patty (Patricia Heaton)
My Step Granny Paula Deen (Herself)
My Sister Gianna Michaels (Herself)
My Sister Kat (Kat Dennings)
My Cousin Alia Janine (Herself)
My Aunt Peggy Bundy (Married With Children)
My Aunt Suga (Kym Whitley)
My Uncle Phil (Dr Phil)
My Cousin Spence (Spence From The King Of Queens)
And
My Cousin Cletus
Episode 01 : Welcome To The World's Horniest Trailer Park
Hey there... I'm James. I'm the star of this big ol' ball of white trash fun and fuckin'. Kick back, pop open a case of Bud, and enjoy my story. It's a fun story. A lot of good ol' fashioned, wholesome, crazy ass fun and games. I live in the Dick Creek Trailer Park, otherwise known as... The World's Horniest Trailer Park.
My family, our friends and I are about as white trash as white trash gets. We fight... we fuck... we party... we fuck... we get drunk... we fuck... we get in trouble... we fuck... and we make the most out of our situation in life... and we fuck.
I just got married... for the third time... to a girl you've probably heard of... Kim Kardashian. We are the odd couple I guess. She's all fancy and rich and sophisticated and shit. Me... I'm the horniest, moonshine makin', drug dealin', white trash pimpin' motherfucker you'll ever come across... and I live in a trailer park. But Kim and I work. We love each other... we care about each other... and the sex is motherfucking awesome.
You see... I'm known as a pretty fuckin' good ladies man. I get em and I get em whenever, wherever, and how ever I want em. I'm pretty darn charming... and I've got a 14 inch cock that's always ready to fuck.
I've got three wives... Kim, my aunt Beth, and porn queen Kelly Madison... several girlfriends... a bunch of hot and horny relatives... a whole mess of fuck buddies... and even a few baby mamas. I think it's four at last count.
Hell... I even got a damn leprechaun (Former WWE Superstar Hornswoggle) living in a shed in my back yard. But more about him later.
I make my way to the living room, nude, scratching my nuts, and sit down. I pick up a half empty beer can from the coffee table and finish it. I yawn and fart... a big one... my morning routine.
My Mama Patty is over there in the kitchen cooking up some breakfast... sausage and steak, bacon, scrambled eggs and biscuits. Mama is a helluva great cook. A great fuck too. She gets me outta jams too. "Hey mama... can you go to Mr Edison's place and suck his cock for me? I owe his ass $500."
"Sure sweetheart... anything for my baby. Come and eat. I'll go take care of him right now for ya."
"OK mama... thank you." Mama kisses me, and jerks my soft cock, as I head in the kitchen to eat. She heads over to the trailer park manager's place to pay off another debt for me. Mama does it all the time. She's awesome.
I dig in and start eating when my new wife comes in, in a white bathrobe, yawning. "Good morning babe." Kim greets me. She comes over and kisses me... I squeeze her ass... then she gets some coffee and comes back over and sits in my lap. "Sexy man. You fucked me so good last night babe. My ass is so sore... in the best possible way. I can barely walk." We laugh and kiss. I fucked Kim's ass all night long last night. I love my wife's ass... everybody does... I just get to fuck it. I'm in love, bitches. I ain't afraid to say it.
People wonder why I'm living in a damn trailer park since I'm married to a rich and famous piece of ass like Kim. I live here because I want to, not because I have to. It's who I am. It's my roots. Kim digs it too. It let's her let her hair down, so to speak. She can run around nude and shit and not worry about the paparazzi harassing her. She's gotta worry about all the horny motherfuckers that live here harassing her, and trying to fuck her and feel her up, but that's somethin' else.
"Mmmmmm... I love you James. I love you so damn much babe. Sexiest white trash pimp ever." We laugh. I suck Kim's tongue and fondle her titties, through her robe. We make out... and eat... and make out some more.
Mama comes back in the trailer. "I don't know what that man eats, but he's got the nastiest tasting sperm I've ever ate. I tried to spit it out, but he made me feel guilty, so I drank it. It's some funky ass cum. He's got a nice cock though. Nice and thick. If you ever suck him off Kim, make sure you chew some gum or something while you swallow that jizz." Mama makes a, "it's gross" face and comes and gets some coffee.
"Thanks mama. You're the best."
"Awwww...you're welcome baby. You know I'll do anything for you sweetie pie." Mama blows me a big kiss and drinks her coffee.