Author's Note: This story was inspired in the Story Ideas forum by Normal_Person. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!
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Kari had started to get used to people telling her she was sexy. Ever since she dyed her hair red, she'd gotten noticed more and more by the outside world - not just as a Mythbuster, but as a sex symbol. The FHM shoot was only the beginning, it seemed. Now she was listed as one of the Sexiest Geeks of 2006 according to a poll in Wired. It wasn't something she'd ever thought to strive for, but she definitely wasn't going to complain. If people were going to tune in because they thought she looked hot, that was more than fine by her. The higher the ratings, the higher her paycheck.
When she'd signed on to do the show, she knew it was going to be a good time. She had been hand picked from Jamie's company to come on board as a member of the team and she couldn't have been happier about it. The fact that she got to work with two young guys - Tori and Grant - was just the icing on the proverbial cake. She closed her eyes as the make-up people did their thing, adding foundation and powder to her cheeks so she wouldn't look washed out on camera. This was the first time in a long time she had no idea what was on the filming schedule for the day. The guys were keeping it under wraps and to be honest, she was a little nervous. She trusted the entire team but there was something about the look in their eyes, especially Tori's, that just made her wonder. Luckily, it was just about time to start production for the day, so the cat would have to be out of the bag soon.
Stepping out of the beautification trailer, her red hair pulled back into two braids, she looked around for the rest of the gang. Finding Tori and Grant in what seemed to be a heated discussion she approached, wondering what all the fuss was about.
"You know this is going to be a myth right?" That was Grant. He had his hands on his hips, looking somewhere between defiant and mortified.
Tori just smirked. "Sure it is, little man. We'll see what happens once the ruler comes out."
Kari was more than a little confused now. She moved to stand beside them, one arm around each of their shoulders. "What's up, guys?" she asked. "What are we measuring and why is this so important that you two are acting like you're about to go three rounds in a boxing ring over it?"
They jumped back a little, not realizing Kari had approached them until she spoke. Tori was the first to recover, a slow smirk spreading across his face. "We have the honor of proving or breaking sexual myths this time around. The three of us, I mean. Of course, the cameras can't be involved in some of it, since it means you're going to get the pleasure of testing us out."
"Oh hell no!" Kari exclaimed. "I'm all about taking one for the team and science but that's going a bit too far. Where are Jamie and Adam? I'm going to put an end to this before it starts."
She had started to head off toward the trailers, only to be stopped by Grant's hand on her arm. "Kari, wait. Think about it before you run off." He led her a few yards away, keeping his voice low. "Number one, I know you haven't gotten any lately. The crew has big ears and even bigger mouths. Not saying abstinence is a bad thing, I'm just saying that Tori and I could make you feel really good." Grant was a huge geek but he was trying. "Number two, one of the myths is about masturbation. Tori and I won't even be in the room for that one, we'll just be monitoring you afterward."
Kari looked at Grant for a long moment. She was considering what he'd said. Her last boyfriend had been less than satisfying and she really hadn't been laid in awhile. Besides, she'd always wondered how good either one of them was in bed. They were your typical guys, full of talk - now she'd get to see for herself if they were spreading myths of their own. "Fine," she said finally. "But if I decide to change my mind, that's it. It's over."
Grant grinned and nodded. "That's fine." Then he winked. "Trust me, you'll love it. I promise."
She just shook her head. "Aah the egos of men. Something that never gets dull, although they get more than a little annoying." She nudged Grant with her elbow, heading back over to where they left Tori. "Okay fine. What are these so-called myths that you guys scrounged up just so you could get into my pants?" Kari was good at pretending to be annoyed. The initial shock was fading and truth be told, she was starting to get a little turned on by the whole idea.
"Well, of course there's the issue of size between the races," Tori said, smirking. "Grant thinks it's going to be busted but I have a feeling science is on my side as far as that goes." Grant just rolled his eyes, although he didn't say a word. "Then there's the matter of whether this change is size gives you different amounts of pleasure. And don't feel like you have to spare Grant's feelings, I'm sure he can take it."
Now it was Kari's turn to roll her eyes. "So basically my part is the 'Does Size Matter' question. Grant had said something about a solo myth too. Which one of the hundreds are we trying to prove or disprove?"
Tori grinned. "As many as we can. We're going to see if you get hairy palms, lose your vision and if you have worse gas than usual afterward."
"That could be a little mortifying if any of those proved true," Kari said, although she knew that these had been gone through time and time again by many experts over the years. "But it will definitely be fun for me to go through them all."
"See? What did I tell you?" Grant looked at her, chuckling. "So...where should we start?"
Kari smirked. "You two go measure yourselves. I'm going to do some shopping."
***
It took Kari a half an hour and two wrong turns to make it to the nearest adult shop. She'd always wanted to experiment with something other than her trusty vibrator - now she could do it and write off the expense as research. Couldn't beat that as far as she was concerned. Wandering through the store, the first thing she grabbed was the infamous Magic Wand. She'd heard so many people rave about it over the years, now it was time to see for herself if it was all hype. Hitting up the vibrators next, she chose one regular one and one G-spot vibe, figuring she could test a couple of myths about female orgasms while working on the others as well.
"Can I help you?" the clerk asked after a few moments. Kari was the only one in the store at this time of day, and the salesperson was bored.
Kari looked at the items in her hands, going to grab a clitoral stimulator that was shaped like a little pink bunny to round things off. "No, I think I have everything." She put the items on the counter, nodding.
"Do you need batteries and lube?"
"Yes, please." She was a little embarrassed that she hadn't thought of it herself, and she waited while the clerk tested all of the products and put them all into paper bags. Kari used her credit card, making sure she got the receipt so she could file it away and gathered the bags, heading back to the car. On the drive back she blasted rock music as loud as it would go, wondering what she was going to find when she got back.
As Kari pulled back onto the lot, she saw Grant and Tori standing alone yet again. She pulled out the bags, making sure that everything was well hidden. These were her toys and they were something she was going to keep to herself. The boys didn't need to know what tools she was going to use to test the greatest masturbation myths of all time. "So guys, what's the verdict?" she asked, smirking as she approached.
"Well," Tori began. "According to the data we compiled by some very kind viewers, and from our own experiences...Caucasian men statistically have larger erections than Asian ones."
Grant's arms were folded over his chest and he looked more than a little pissed about the whole situation. "Okay fine, so that myth may be accurate. We still have others to try so can we please just get on with it?"
Out of instinct, Kari kissed Grant softly. "No worries Grant, you get first dibs on me when we test the myth of penetration." She winked at him and then shot a look at Tori, showing him she wasn't impressed with his lack of tact. "Now, where am I going to be testing the masturbation myth? I'm ready whenever you are."
"Not so fast," Tori said with a laugh. "That's going to have to wait until tomorrow."
"Tomorrow?" Grant and Kari asked in unison.