WHAT IF... Spider-Man met Yelena Belova?
Across infinite numbers of realities, heroes cross paths time and time again, sometimes they're friendly first encounters such as Ant-Man meeting Captain America. And sometimes.... Not so friendly, like when Iron Man met Thor.
But no matter what, over the years prior to two heroes first meeting, writers and fans alike have pondered the same question.....WHAT IF...?
-New York, 2024-
As Christmas day drew closer in the big apple, for Kate Bishop and Clint Barton, their holiday season was filled with fights, life altering revelations, and the beginning of a new partnership as they battled the tracksuit mafia in Rockefeller center.
During this fight however, Clint came face to face with Yelena Belova, black widow and sister to Natasha Romanoff. Clint's life was spared thanks to a whistle that tugged at Yelena's heartstrings, causing her to let Clint go free as she simply abandoned her assigned mission to assassinate him.
Yelena took off far away from the scene, however on this night in New York, Hawkeye and Kate Bishop weren't the only heroes dealing with the tracksuits. A few blocks away, swinging through the skies of New York was none other than Spider-Man AKA Peter Parker.
To keep the police away from the main fight at 30 rock, several tracksuits were causing mischief all over the city to spread the police thin. Spider-Man aided the men in blue to take down the Russian mobsters before any civilians got hurt. This is where our two heroes would meet for the first time.
As Yelena sprinted down the streets, getting far away from the main battle, she found herself walking right into the middle of one of the tracksuits distractions for the police. The group of thugs were breaking into a shop, setting off the alarms as Yelena walked by. One of the men spotted her, grabbing her arm tight as he declared "You're staying with us little girl, we'll need a hostage..."
From the moment the man gripped her wrist, Yelena's fight or flight instinct kicked in, however her years of training in the red room caused her to really only have one response in this situation, fight. Yelena quickly grabbed the man's elbow, cracking it with a quick chop and releasing his grip before Yelena delivered a quick snapmare leg sweep, taking him down in a flash.
As the rest of the gang saw their fallen friend, they all turned to face Yelena, pointing their guns collectively at her. Yelena looked down the barrel of each weapon, contemplating her next move when suddenly through the cold air came a "Thwip". One of the tracksuits looked at the tip of his gun to see it covered in webs.
"OH NO! IT'S SPIDER-MAN, BROS!" he called out.
Yelena turned just in time to see the wall crawler swing into action as he hit a perfect gliding kick into one of the attackers. Before any of the other mercs could realize it, their gun barrels had also been webbed up, unable to fire out at him. With their weapons decommissioned, the tracksuits instead decided to fight hand to hand with Spider-Man and Yelena, however this was a terrible idea as Spider-Man quickly webbed several of them to the wall whereas Yelena cracked ribs and electrocuted several of them with her widow's bite tool in a matter of minutes. With their final moves, both heroes struck similar poses as they faced each other.
Yelena looked into his big white eyes and smirked as she shook her head "Nice job, poser"
"Poser? I'm not a fake! I'm the real Spider-Man!" He said as he pointed at his suit.
Yelena rolled her eyes as she explained "I mean all the silly poses you do whenever you fight..."
"Oh.." Spidey replied "Well I only do that so I can stay flexible, it also throws my attackers off a bit, gives me the advantage..."
Yelena nodded with an impressed expression, however the wall crawler's curiosity was still peeked by this random woman's extreme fighting abilities.
"Where'd you learn to fight like that?" he asked.
Yelena didn't answer as she started to walk off.
"Woah woah wait!" Spider-Man said as he sprinted after her.
Yelena began to run as well, though Spider-Man was quickly able to catch up to her. Yelena thought of a different approach as she used her grappling gun to climb up a building, however as she reached the top and looked down, thinking she'd gotten away, as she turned around there was Spider-Man, perched and waving at her.
"Soooo you're a great fighter AND you've got cool gadgets... are you a friend or a foe? Cuz the way tonights going so far I need a friend rather than a foe..." she said honestly.
Yelena smirked as she put away her grappler and replied "I'm neither... Just a woman looking to get out of the city... Do you think you could help me with that... Peter Parker!"
Spider-Man's eyes opened wide as he said in a shocked tone "Wait...WHAT!? HOW DO YOU..."
Yelena cut him off as she explained "You didn't think I'd come to New York without researching any and all variables that could jeopardize my mission, did you? I've seen security footage of you leaving your apartment building, all it takes is a bit more research to find out who lives there and boom, Spider-Man is Peter Parker "
Spider-Man sat in silence for a few moments, astonished by how easily his identity was discovered.
"Hu... I guess I should get that fixed soon..." He joked.
"Look Peter Parker, I'm not going to hurt you... In fact I was hoping to see you during my trip to New York.." Yelena admitted.
"Really you uh... you wanted to uh... um..." Peter stuttered.
Yelena crossed her arms and listened to his trembling tone as she could tell what was going on.
"Tell me Peter Parker.... Are you a virgin?" Yelena asked without hesitation.
Peter fell into silence once again for a few seconds before shaking his head "Uh no, nope, not a virgin.... Wait... why did you ask that?"
"Because you sound so nervous to talk to a woman it's like you've never had sex before" Yelena explained.
"I mean I... someone can still get nervous talking to someone pretty because they don't wanna sound foolish, especially if it's their first time meeting... especially if that person instantly knows your secret identity..." Peter rambled.
Yelena's interest was piqued by something Peter said as she stepped towards him.
"What did you say?" Yelena asked.
"What? what what do you mean what did I say?" Peter asked.
"Did you just say I was pretty?" Yelena clarified, smirking a bit.
"I uh... no.. yes... I don't know, I wasn't paying attention I was uh... distracted..." Peter replied.