I don't know about you, but there's something about female body builders that really turns me on. There's more of 'em on the net these days than you can shake a stick at, of course, but there's one who stands out – pardon my pun – ahead of all the rest.
I'm referring to the lovely Utah Sweet. She's blonde, she's busty and she's mature, a combination I find irresistible. Depending on who you believe, she's either 36 or 40-years-old. Doesn't really matter. Like the lovely Utah said to me on our first date, when I asked how old she was: "How old you want me to be, honey."
That must have been the tact of a former airline stew coming out in her – OK, I know they're called fuckin' flight attendants these days, but to me they're fuckin' stews. And speaking of "coming out", what also comes out in her is that fantastic set of jugs – once again, the size depends on which information you believe. Some reckon she's a 38DD, others say 40 and others again reckon she's a 44EE.
Tell you what, none of the above matter a fuck. What matters is they are the firmest, most wonderful titties I've ever worshipped and I've worshipped a few, believe you me!
The rest of her stacks out at 25 and 36, according to some, and 24 and 32, according to others. I believe the former, but who takes a fuckin' tape measure to a body worship session?
That was the way I got to know the lovely Californian. I'm a self-made millionaire, I'm 50-years-old, but I look less than that, some ladies say a lot less. I've got long black hair, almost to my shoulders and there are some who reckon I've got the dark, brooding looks of a Spaniard. At 6 foot 2 inches, with a well-muscled body thanks to hours in the gym, I have no trouble pulling the ladies.
And when I display my equipment down there I have no trouble fuckin' 'em either – it's only eight inches, but it's thick and it's uncut. I have very prominent balls, which makes my cock sit up on the scrotal sack like it's always in a state of semi-permanent, semi-stiffness.
I've made my money from designing a specific part for those advertising hoardings that rush around motor racetracks at improbably high speeds – Formula One and IndyCar advertising hoardings, mostly. It's a highly sophisticated little gizmo that makes changing gear much easier. 'Course it's done at the push of a button or a pedal flap these days, and I'm not gonna tell you any more. Top secret type of crap.
Anyway, I called Utah on her private mobile number and this doll answered. Honest, I thought I'd cream my jeans when I heard her voice. That "Coffee, tea or me?" purr that you want to hear from every blonde stew – oh, all right, flight attenddant -who ever helped you fasten your seat belt.
I'm not exactly the shy retiring kind, but I was enchanted by her voice. "Hi," I said, trying to maintain my West Coast cool, "my name's Dirk, and I was wondering whether you'd be available for a body worship session?"
There was a laugh, and then Utah told me: "If you've got the money honey, I've got the time – and I guess we've both got the inclination."
"Tell you what," I said, feeling more comfortable now. "I believe a body worship session is a pretty intimate kinda thing. What say we meet beforehand, get to know each other, work out if it's gonna be mutual. Say lunch tomorrow at the Water Grill? You OK with that?"
Utah certainly was. "I
love
seafood," she said. We made a date for lunch the next day and I went into a state of semi-arousal for 24 hours!
I reached the restaurant a couple of blocks off Wilshire Boulevard early, got the kid to park my little Mercedes SLR McLaren (well, it's not that little!), and sipped on a beer in the bar. About the appointed time, this fuckin' vision walked into the restaurant.
Tall, I reckon around six feet in her high heels – she's five feet eight inches without 'em – and with long blonde hair cascading to her shoulders, Utah wore a red leather jacket, trendy blue jeans and had a Gucci bag slung over her shoulder.
She stepped alongside me, an intoxicating aroma of expensive perfume, Calvin Klein, I guessed, wafted into my nostrils and she planted a chaste little peck on my cheek. "If you're Dirk, I'm Utah," she smiled, and ordered an orange juice.
At the table, we weren't showered with attention – the Water Grill is
far
too fuckin' sophisticated for that - but the waiter who looked after us did a lot of looking. At Utah's stunning breasts!
She ordered Ecuadorian mahi mahi, I had the New Zealand John Dory and we swilled a bottle of vintage Krug down with the food. If I'm out with a supermodel, I don't stint!
Over the meal, I gathered that Utah liked men who paid gentle attention to her body in a worshipping situation, she didn't mind performing mild domination and she appreciated a man who was generous.
Like a man who's made his money in the cutthroat business of motor racing, I cut to the chase. "How much do you charge?"
Utah gave me a sweet smile, then cut me down to size. "I never charge my men friends," she said, "but I never refuse a token of their appreciation."
I sat back and sighed after the excellent dish – this joint's the best fuckin' seafood place on the West Coast. "I can be very, very appreciative, Utah," I told her and she laid a perfectly manicured, but very strong, hand on mine.
"Well then, Dirk," she said, in that oh-so-sexy stew voice, "we're gonna get along just famously."
She asked me where I made my money. I told her and she turned up her nose. "Racing cars," she said, looking down her nose at me. "Lots of men with Italian and German names driving round and round boring little race tracks, earning far too much money and all thinking they're God's gift to women."
"Precisely," I said, "when it's me who makes their silly little cars not smash their gear boxes and when it's me who, in reality, is God's gift to women!"
She had the decency to laugh at my feeble little joke, then drained her last flute of Krug and looked me directly in the eye: "OK, Dirk, how's about it?"
I looked surprised. "You mean that's it? We're on now?"
Utah grinned. "I like you, you don't look like a fuckin' sex maniac – and I think I'm a pretty good judge – so where do we go? I take it if you make millions out of those fuckin' boring Grand Prix dudes, you don't exactly live in a one room apartment? Unless this is all bravado."
For "bravado" I hauled out my black card – you know the one – and paid the bill.
"You mean, you're all ready to go?" I asked, once again sounding like a gauche kid.
Utah laughed. "I've got sexy underwear in the bag, a PVC bikini, some leather gear, and a little leather lash, Dirk. Reckon I need anything else?"
I shook my head. "Sounds like you're like the fuckin' boy scout," I said. "And if you're prepared, your carriage awaits."
Outside, I tipped the boy who brought the Mercedes round a $50 bill, mainly because I was feeling very fuckin' excited. I could tell by the way the kid feasted his eyes on Utah he was pretty fuckin' excited too!
As I pointed the Merc McLaren north towards my mansion – look it's a fuckin' mansion 'cos I can afford a fuckin' mansion, OK? – I could see Utah was impressed.
"This is the sort of car you get to drive when you make gear boxes for racing cars, eh Dirk?" she said.
"Well," I smiled, pleased she liked the Krautmobile, "it's better'n a fuckin' Bentley and it's faster'n a fuckin' Porsche. And anyway, I get a discount from the company 'cos I'm working on a tweaked version of my little gear box gizmo for 'em next year. The way they fuckin' went this year, they fuckin' need it."
"Too much fuckin' information," Utah laughed, and then stretched back to enjoy the ride. Men in higher vehicles must have stretched things looking down on her fabulous superstructure when they drew alongside us at lights, too.
We drove through the security gates at my walled mansion in its gated and secluded area looking down on Thousand Oaks golf course. It's not the biggest spread in greater LA, but it's not the smallest, either. Utah looked impressed.
"Nice," she said, climbing from the Merc, and looking at the double storey building. "Lead the way, Mr Formula One!"
Inside I could see she was impressed, again. But she had a "but". "Prove to me it's your home and not been loaned to you by a friend, Mr F One," she said, abbreviating the title she had bestowed on me.
I laughed and led her to one of the rooms overlooking the massive swimming pool. In the middle of the room was a large, glass-topped table. Set in it was a grand prix engine.
"That's from a Mercedes W-196," I told her. "From the days before they put advertising on 'em."
She nodded appreciatively. "And who's that?" she said, pointing to a photograph on the wall of me standing with Michael Schumacher.
"It's Michael Schumacher after one of his driver's championships wins, I forget which one," I said.
"He's good in the wet," said Utah.
"Yep, but not as good as Rudi Caracciola," I told her.
"Carafuckin' who?" she asked. But then she pointed to a picture of me with Stirling Moss.
"Who's he?" she asked.
"Stirling Moss," I said, naming one of Britain's best-ever GP drivers.
"He looks gay," she said.