Vacations. We all need one once in a while. Even if your life's a near 24 hour fuckathon like mine is, it's good to jet off somewhere every now and again, if only for the change of scenery. Or so I've been led to believe. Those of you who remember my first encounter with Hayley Atwell will know that I, in fact, am woefully under-travelled, and have never actually left these United States. Well, Hayley herself could scarcely believe it when I told that to her and has been bugging me to visit her in London ever since.
Now, call me crazy, but as a lifelong resident of suburban LA, I've never really had much interest in that rainy little island across the pond, and have always thought that I'd feel more at home in the sun of Southern California. But then I met Hayley. Frankly, I'd hop on the next flight to war torn Somalia if she asked me to, and would be more than happy to brave a stroll through the foggy streets of London if I knew that curvy body of hers would be there waiting for me.
So the intent was there, for sure, but getting our schedules to align was tricky to say the least. I was fully booked from our first encounter in September 2022, right through to the following May. Yep, even Christmas. Of course, Hayley came to visit me whenever she was in LA, which was more than enough to tide us over, but that fabled week together in the city of London remained as elusive as ever.
Then, as May turned to June and the heat in Los Angeles ratcheted up just that little bit more, those regulars of mine with partners and families (which is most of them, if I'm totally honest) sought to swap the hustle and bustle of Hollywood for the sandy beaches of Europe and the Caribbean. Suddenly my diary was looking a little thin, so I contacted Hayley as quickly as I could to tell her the good news.
Unfortunately she was still pretty busy with filming and the like, but knowing Hayley as well as I did, I wasn't surprised to learn that she had a solution. Instead of staying with her for the duration of my trip, Hayley suggested renting a place for a week so I could entertain some visitors while she was off at work. She'd told all her friends about me, as guests tend to do, and said she knew of a great many Brits who were longing to pay me a visit.
Of course, I leapt at the suggestion and spent the next few weeks trawling UK property sites for vacation homes in the vicinity of the nation's capital. I found somewhere I liked the look of in a place called 'Kent', and Hayley went along to take a look at it for me, giving me a virtual tour with her phone as the realtor (or the 'estate agent', as she called him) showed her around. The house looked nice and was a decent size (it didn't look too much different to my own place really) so I gave her the go ahead. Hayley's people took care of the rest and before I knew it the place was mine for the third week of July.
I booked my flights and carried on my schedule as normal, growing increasingly excited as Hayley filled me in on her plans for the week. My flight was booked for the Thursday evening, meaning I'd arrive in London at about 3am on Saturday probably, but I'm sure that wouldn't stop Hayley from giving me a very warm British welcome. She was free on Friday but busy on the weekend and for much of the following week, so she booked me in a few visitors to keep me busy. Then Hayley and I would have the weekend together before I came back home. It was coming together nicely. All I needed was someone to keep me company for the first couple days and I was good to go.
Enter Christina Hendricks.
Christina had been a regular visitor for a few months now, after being first brought along by Alison Brie (what a weekend that was!). She'd been with her fiance in Italy for the first two weeks of June and, far be it from me to say that she missed me, but she booked a stay at my place as soon as she got back home. Visits from Christina are always wild, but this one was a cut above. We fucked like bunnies for the entire duration, stopping only to eat, sleep a little and to take the occasional shower.
She'd been busy with work before she went on her trip, so by the time her stay rolled around Christina had been deprived of my cock for about six weeks. I'm not saying she had an itch to scratch, but even after three days of almost non-stop sex she
still
wasn't fully satisfied and even enquired about the possibility of extending her stay until the weekend. Normally I'd have jumped at the chance, but I was scheduled to drink a nice warm pint of bitter in one of Kent's finest pubs that weekend and not even Miss Hendricks and her world-famous tits were going to get in the way of that.
"Sorry," I said with a heavy heart. "No can do, I'm afraid. I'm flying to London on Thursday."
"London, huh?" she replied, sounding more intrigued than disappointed.
"Yeah...visiting someone."
"Care to tell me who?"
"Erm...not really sure I should."
"Oh, come on," she pushed. "I'm not gonna blab. Who is it?"
"OK, it's Hayley Atwell."
"Oooh, lucky you! I've always wanted to meet her. Think I could tag along?"
Now, obviously my first thought was 'Hayley Atwell and Christina Hendricks? Yes, yes, a million times YES!',
but
with Hayley's work commitments, we'd only have three days together and...well, I wasn't sure she'd be willing to share.
But instead of explaining all that I simply laughed it off, replying with a casual, "well, I'm leaving in the morning. I'd imagine the flight is fully booked by now."
Christina laughed too, louder than I did, then patted my head like a dog. "Oh, God. You're adorable. I'm Christina Hendricks, honey," she explained with a grin. "
Nothing
is fully booked for me."
Kinda patronising, but I guess that made sense. "OK, but I haven't seen Hayley in a while. She might, you know...want me all for herself."
I half expected her to say 'I'm Christina Hendricks' again, but instead she basically just ignored me, dismissing my words with a wave of her hand. "Oh, I'm sure that won't be a problem. How long are you going for?"
"Ten days."
"Ten days?! Fuck, I don't think even *I* could handle you for ten days! She's gonna need some help! Tell you what, I'll just come for the first couple days, then greedy little Miss Atwell can have you to herself. Sound good?"
Of course that did sound good, but obviously Hayley wasn't gonna be there for much of my stay so I still wasn't sure that would work. I considered telling Christina that, then decided to maybe
stop