Disclaimer: This is an erotic story, however your mileage may vary. You must be 18 years or older to read this story, be able to read erotica in your community and not be offended by the contents of it. If you are not at least 18, live in an overly repressed community, or are easily offended, move on. This is not for you.
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And now the story -
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The life of a financial planner is generally not an overly exciting one. Sure, if you don't really know what a financial planner does you might be willing to believe that it's exciting and glamorous, especially if your clientele includes some of Hollywood's A-list and many young hope-to-be's. But trust me, Bruce Willis and Tom Cruise won't be playing me in any bio-pics anytime soon. My life is far less that of a super-cop or international spy and more that of a glorified CPA. Minus the really nifty pocket-protectors accountants seem to have co-opted from the IT guys of course.
Take that part about Hollywood A-listers and rising young stars. Sounds glamorous right? Get to meet with George Clooney and Brad Pitt, schmooze with Sandy Bullock and Sarah Michelle Gellar. Offer stock tips to Jennifer Garner. Right? Wrong. Try meet with the business managers, schmooze with the assistants and give stock tips to the relatives with all the financial acumen of a tree stump.
For instance, the other day I had my quarterly meeting scheduled with Shannen Doherty. I'd been her financial planner for some years now and it was time to get together to discuss her portfolio. What to buy and what to drop, what real estate holdings were newly available in her market and how her existing holdings were performing, her income and projected growth and what's in store for her when the casting directors are no longer calling. Not exactly the most exciting topics on earth, particularly if, like me, you do it all day long, every day, year after year. And it's even less thrilling if you're used to the glitz and glamour of a Hollywood lifestyle. So was I excited about my meeting with Shannen? About being face to face with an incredibly hot young actress? Of course not. Shannen wouldn't be coming within a mile of my office. The only thing I was going to be face to face with that afternoon was her business managers, two guys far older and even more stuffy than I was. And they cared about just one thing. Was I increasing Shannen's net worth? If so, then they were happy. Deliriously so. The more it increased the better since their compensation was tied in to her total income. So, while the meeting was going to be a lengthy one, lasting almost all afternoon, it certainly didn't promise to be an exciting one. Unless your idea of excitement is watching dough rise.
Which sort of explains why I felt safe doing what I did before the meeting.
Let me explain.
See, I'm the kind of guy who has long-term relationships with women. I'm not a serial dater, at least not the way one usually defines serial dater. I go out with a woman and more often than not it develops into a relationship that can last for quite some time. And if, or when as has been the case every time up to now, it eventually comes to an end, I wait awhile and meet someone else and another relationship begins. That's how it's always been. It's kind of like a routine for me. Habitual. Stable. Predictable. Tedious.
So, as expected, my last fling ended, some eight months ago, and for some reason, this time, after I got over feeling sad about the demise of one more relationship, I was unable to get into the frame of mind I needed to allow me to move on and begin something new. I just wasn't very interested in meeting women. I found the whole thing... boring. Much like I was finding everything else in my life at the time. Boring. Now in and of itself it's not such a huge problem to be a little tired of the whole dating ritual, except... I was horny. Very, very horny.
And horniness, as I bet you can imagine, is a great motivator. Having the ability to do everything from getting teenage boys to comb their hair and brush their teeth through getting grown men to sit and watch The English Patient on up to being the underlying reason for countless wars. Sure, the books all say it was 'for the love of a woman' but that's just code for the guy wasn't getting any and he was horny and he thought that if he just, pick one of the above, the girl would give it up. Sometimes it even works and that just reinforces the belief in horny men everywhere. If I just do this, maybe she'll have sex with me. And so it was for me too. It was horniness that finally forced me back out there and, against the better judgment of every man on the planet, I found myself being set up on a blind date with a co-worker of the wife of one of my best friends. Yes, I know, that was pretty dumb of me. But I was horny, remember?
The first date went okay, and for some not so inexplicable reason I agreed to a second, and that went okay too, as did the third and the fourth and before I knew it I found myself slipping down the slope into yet another relationship, complete with a weekend in the wine country for two. What does any of this have to do with my meeting with Shannen's people you ask? Don't worry, I'm getting there. So anyway, my meeting with Shannen's representatives was on Friday afternoon, my last appointment before the weekend. After the meeting I was supposed to meet my new lady friend and we were going to drive up the coast to a bed and breakfast. As you might expect if you were going to spend two days away with someone, I assumed we were going to have sex at some point during the weekend. Just one tiny problem though, the prospect did not excite me. I mean, the thought of finally having sex after having gone so long without thrilled me, but not the person I was going to be with. She didn't really do it for me. Not at all. Don't get me wrong, she was attractive enough. I guess. Just not to me. So why did I agree to go away with her for the weekend? Did you get the part about how horny I was?
Anyway, I was going to be alone with this woman and I knew one of us was probably going to make some sort of move and, in spite of the fact that it was an overwhelming feeling of horniness that had gotten me into this in the first place, I still had my doubts about my... response if and when the time finally arrived. Would my ambivalence about the situation leave me so turned off that I couldn't even get it up? Or would the eight long, long months without sex make it so that it didn't matter how little attraction I felt towards her, I would be raring to go. So raring that it might even all be over before it started. I just didn't know. And neither possibility was particularly appealing to me. I know, I should have just canceled the whole thing and said my goodbyes and gone home to watch some porn, but I didn't. Instead I came up with a plan. It's what I do, as you might have guessed from my job title. I plan. And my plan called for me to see a doctor about a prescription for a little performance boost. You know, something that -- cut to tremendously sexy woman clad only in a man's dress shirt -- improves the 'quality of the experience'. I figured that this way I was covered no matter how I responded. If I was having trouble getting in the mood, presto, chemically induced hardon, and if I was a little too eager, well, presto, chemically induced second hardon. See. I was covered. Of course I didn't explain all this to the doctor, I just gave him the usual song and dance about how my erections were no longer as satisfactory as they used to be. Job related stress I offered. Not that I think the doctor really cared why I wanted the pills, he just wanted to push his drug of choice, but I didn't want him to think there was anything permanently wrong with me. The male ego really is a fragile thing where some subjects are concerned. So anyway, I told my sob story, the doctor bought it and twenty minutes later I was on my way back to my office with a sample pack of Cialis in my pocket and a prescription for a two week supply.
So I went to a doctor to get some pills for erectile dysfunction, what's the big deal you ask? Well, if it had ended there then I suppose it wouldn't be anything to get worked up over, but it didn't end there. That was really just the beginning. Because after I got back to my office I did something that seemed harmless at the time, but could have had the potential to destroy my entire career. I took one of the samples. The 20mg pill. The strongest dosage they make. Yes, I can be exactly that stupid. Now do you see the big deal?