"She wouldn't stake him, would she?" Dawn asked doubtfully, as she glanced back at the black Desoto that followed Angel's car closely. She could see the brunette and the blond vampire staring sullenly ahead, oblivious to each other.
"I don't know." Angel said idly, focusing on the road. He sounded completely uninterested. He picked up his traveler's mug full of coffee and took a deep swallow.
"You don't know?" She crossed her arms. "You don't fool me."
Angel glanced at her, perplexed."What are you talking about, Dawn?"
"Spike. If Faith staked him you'd be upset."
"I would?" Angel gave a throat laugh. "I can assure you, princess. . .my heart would go on."
"Your heart, huh?"
"Yes." Angel smiled smugly, amused by his witticism.
"So, you're implying that you and Spike are close, eh?"
Angel frowned. "Of course we're close, I'm his sire."
Dawn waggled her eyebrows. "His sire. I've read a few things in the Watcher's journals about that. It's a very special relationship, isn't it?"
"You could say that."
"So, it's a unique bond? And sometimes it's uh. . .sexual, right?" He thought back to his relationship with his sire. Angel nodded, taking another drink of coffee.
"So, does that make it incest?" She thought a moment, scrunching up her pert nose. "Or necrophilia? Oh! Or maybe bestiality?"
Angel spit out his coffee, splattering the windshield.
*******
"Why the hell is he spitting on the windshield?" Spike asked, watching the interaction in the other car very carefully.
"Bug?" Faith offered.
"Could be." He gestured to the other car. "Now, will you look at how he's driving? He's going ten miles below the soddin' speed limit." Spike grumbled. Just like a little old lady. All that's missing is the bleedin' hair net.
"What's your hurry, blood boy?"
"Stop calling me that." Spike gave her a disgusted look. "I should be riding with nibblet."
Faith crossed her arms over her chest. She'd been relieved to ride with Spike and when Angel had suggested it, she jumped at the opportunity. "Aren't you a little old for D.?"
"No, she's got a few centuries on me. Cradle robber." Spike smiled to himself.
"The Key has a few centuries, not D. She's only 18, innocent, and probably a virgin."
Spike sighed, thinking of all the wicked things he could teach her."You really think so?"
Faith smacked his arm. "Just remember, that's my daughter your talking about. You hurt her and I'll-"
"What? Stake me? Behead me? Come on, Slayer, tell me!" Spike goaded, used to Buffy's threats.
"No, I'll cut off your 'spike' and shove it up your-"
*******
"Well, that's rude."
"Because I won't give you my sexual history? Well, I'm not going to. By the way, where did you learn those words, anyway?"
"Angel, I'm 18, not 8. Besides, I was curious. I didn't ask for details! Though if you and Spike have-"
"I didn't sleep with Spike. Why does everybody ask me that?"
"Who else asked you?" She asked, surprised.
"Buffy, Willow, Xander, and uh, Giles."
"Giles?"
"He asked me for the ' historical record'."
"Well, I get Buffy asking. You were her boyfriend. And Spike calls you 'peaches', everyone probably assumed that you two had a relationship. So. . . you weren't 'sleeping' with him." She looked at him suddenly, very lawyer-like. What did you two do when you were awake?"
Angel glowered at her, deciding to ignore her last comment. "Just like he assumes that you and I have a relationship." Angel got a sly look in his eyes.
*******
"Wait a minute. You just avoided my entire question."
"Is that before or after you decided to cut off my manly parts?"
Faith smirked as she glanced at his lap. "Not very manly, if you ask me. I've seen bigger."