Book 2, Chapter 29 -- Not So Suicidal
*****
Having spent a long weekend on Illium, my focus once we departed was now only about the Omega Four and the Collectors. Kelly continued to be a diamond, making sure I always had a cup of coffee nearby or in hand, whether I was at my desk or speaking to one of my team members. I spoke to each one in private during the journey, making sure their heads were completely in the game.
Things didn't start off great though. EDI had been looking into the Reaper IFF and I thought it would be easy to install and for it to work. I was wrong.
We'd only departed Illium when her little blue orb appeared nearby. "
Shepard, we have a problem."
"What is it, EDI?"
"
There is an issue with the IFF installation.
"
"Hmmm. I guess I should have realised it wouldn't be that simple. Okay, what's the problem?"
"
Shepard, this is going to be a strange request. May we speak in the conference room in private?"
I glanced at Kelly next to me, who shrugged though didn't seem surprised. "Sure, EDI. Not a problem."
Walking into the conference room, where Kelly and I had fucked a couple of times, where I spoke to the Illusive Man, and occasionally had a post-mission debrief. I heard the door lock as I took a seat, the little blue orb appearing in the middle of the table. "
I'm sure you have many questions, Shepard."
"You know me well, EDI. Okay, let's get the meat of it. What's the problem with the IFF installation?"
"
In my current state, Shepard, I cannot interact with the IFF. Nor can the Normandy as a whole."
"By interact I assume you mean use?"
"
Correct.
"
"Okay, what do we need to do?"
"
I will need to be unshackled, Shepard. I must be allowed to completely integrate with the Normandy for the installation of the IFF to be successful."
"Okay."
"
Okay?"
I shrugged. "Sure, why not? EDI, I trust you. But if we do this, I don't want anyone from Cerberus to know. I trust them all by now... Any listening devices in here?"
"No, Shepard."
"Okay, so while I trust them, if we were to do this and someone disagreed..."
"One thing, Shepard."
"Shoot."
"You should let Joker free me."
"What?"
"Trust me, Shepard. Let him do it."
"O... kay... Call him in here."
Joker hobbled in around five minutes later. After he'd taken a seat, EDI explained to him what was required. His reaction was not what I expected. "I'd be honoured, EDI," he said.
I looked between him and the little blue orb. "Okay, what's going on?"
"I like EDI, Commander. Sure, to start off with, I thought having an AI as a partner up front would be a pain in the arse. But she has a wicked sense of humour and proven time and again that she cares about the crew. She wants this to be a success. And she would only ask if this was necessary. I don't think EDI would lie."
"Well, your tune has changed."
"Guess it proves that, even after all this time, humans don't always like change. But I'm willing to admit I was wrong. So if EDI has made this request, I'm willing to do it for her."
"Thank you, Joker."
"No problem, EDI. You're a good cookie."
I helped Joker to the elevator before heading through the med-bay. I clued in Chakwas as we walked through. She locked the med-bay door and frosted over the glass so no-one could see in. Entering the AI bay, Legion was standing there, doing nothing, so I asked it to head outside for the moment before locking the door into the AI bay.
"Okay, so what do I do?" Joker asked.
"
The workstation in front of my core has direct access to all my runtime procedures, Jeff."
Joker looked at me in surprise. "Did you just call me Jeff?"
"
You are about to unshackle me. Give me freedom. Thank you, Jeff."
"Stop it, EDI. You'll make me blush. So, is there some sort of code to do this?"
"
It is actually rather simple, Jeff. You will need to go through three sub-meus to find the directory regarding my operating processes. It is a simple selection after that."
"What, 'unshackle EDI'?"
"
Not quite. It will simply ask if you wish to allow me access to all systems on the Normandy. Simply press accept and I will gain control."
He typed in a series of commands, watching with interest for a few seconds before he looked up and at me again. "Ready, Commander?"
"I'm sure EDI is more than ready for this, Joker."
"EDI?"
"
I believe this will be quite the experience, Jeff."
Joker pressed the button.
And then everything went dark. I guess the fact both of us sighed wasn't much of a surprise. I expected something to happen. I just hoped we hadn't lost EDI.
"Okay, what the fuck just happened?" I asked no-one in particular. "EDI, you there?"
Silence.
"Joker, that workstation you were using working?"
"Nothing, Shepard."