Book 1, Chapter 13 -- Relationships
*****
"It's a piece of shit, Shepard, but thanks for doing it for me," the big krogan rumbled. I just slapped him on the back.
"No worries, Wrex. Glad to help you out. What will you do with it?"
"The armour? Nothing but a memento of times past. But I've been thinking after all our chats, and though you're centuries younger than me, I'll ask for your advice. My people... They need help and as I'm out here, helping you, and apparently solving half of the galaxies problems, I'm wondering if it isn't time to go home and finally do something."
"You have a strength in your I've rarely seen, Wrex. Do you believe you could unite your people?"
"All I can do is try. But being around you lot, seeing how you are changing things, or resolving old issues, it's got me thinking at least."
"Well, not sure if it means anything, but you have my support."
I noticed the smile, if krogan did smile, appear. "Thank, Shepard. Means a lot coming from anyone other than a non-krogan. Not used to people giving a shit about our problems."
"Don't know about other krogan, Wrex, but I do believe in honour. Not sure what you've done over the years, maybe you've done some shit to survive, but you've stuck by my side ever since you stepped foot on this ship. So, as far as I'm concerned, you've had my back, so I'll have yours in the future."
"Keep this up, Shepard, I'm going to cry." He said it in such a tone, we both started to laugh, almost falling over when he smacked me on the upper arm.
Leaning back against the bench, I crossed my arms and relaxed, as I wanted to broach another subject on my mind. "Tell me to butt out if you wish, Wrex, but I do have another question or two, of a more personal nature."
"You're the CO, Shepard. Ask whatever you want."
"Okay, fair enough. What's the deal with Ashley and Tali? Merely curious, that's all."
The big krogan rumbled with laughter. "Figured you would ask eventually. Okay, I'll put it simply regarding Ashley. She's horny, Shepard. I mean, she's down to fuck. And since you were giving her signals but didn't follow through, she went looking elsewhere. Don't get me wrong, she really likes you but, given the mixed signals, she simply wanted to be fucked and I guess I was the next best thing."
I couldn't help sigh. "It's not mixed signals, Wrex. I like her but... I don't want to mix work and pleasure. Being intimate with Shiala hasn't created too many issues but we haven't been together since before Noveria. I know Liara is ever so keen and Benezia is now showing an interest too, though I'm sure she has rather different motives than others."
"I'm not one to tell you what to do, Shepard, but trust me on this. Ashley wants to be fucked, and she definitely wants to be fucked by you. Yes, I've been with her but I was a... stopgap... simply a dick for her to enjoy."
"Selling yourself short there, Wrex."
"I'm a realist, Shepard. I'm krogan, she's human. No human is going to look at a krogan as a potential romantic partner, never mind some sort of mate. Don't think that's possible anyway. No, she was with me as a way to let off some steam. Don't get me wrong, enjoyed every second. Human females definitely have some qualities any species of male can enjoy."
"What about Tali?"
Wrex remained surprisingly quiet for a while. "I like her a lot, Shepard. She's fucking adorable. Part of me just wants to hide her away from all the evil and cruelties of the galaxy. She's my little friend, and I'd do anything to protect her." I couldn't help meet his eyes, nodding at the sincerity in his voice. I had seen the bond they'd already built. Then he smirked. "I will admit that there is this carnal part of me, that every krogan has, that simply wants to rip off that suit of hers and ruin her. I've already warned her about that, the fact I would hurt her, and most of me would feel awful about it. There's that small part, one or two percent, that wants to throw her down and just ruin that pussy. But I could never do it. You do realise she's a virgin, right?" I nodded. "And she's crazy about you, Shepard. And the reason she comes to me is that she is completely and utterly sexually repressed being in that suit. It's why she's come to me and it's why she's looking at Ashley as a potential partner."
"Wait, what? Ashley? I didn't even think..."
"No idea if they are or not, but Tali has definitely shown as interest in Ashley, and she's certainly told Tali what she thinks of her. Honestly, once Tali is out of that suit of hers, and I think it'll happen soon, I believe Ashley will be having first go at that pussy. Good for both of them, I say."
I couldn't help chuckle. "I understand now what Garrus was talking about when going on about the relationships in this ship. So what about you and Alenko?"
"Look, you've obviously realised by now I like to fuck, Shepard, and I'll fuck anyone. I'm too old to give a shit. But I also don't do feelings. Once the other person gets those, I end it. I'm not sure he has feelings, but I think he has expectations I'm simply not willing to meet. I think he needs to find one of his own kind to have a proper relationship with."
I ran a hand down my face at the revelations. "You understand why I keep my distance right? Shiala wasn't a mistake, but I gave into temptation very easy regarding her. I think it was the connection from Feros. But Liara, Ashley, Tali, even Benezia... I keep my work and private life separate. You obviously know about the women I've been with otherwise as I haven't kept it a secret..."
"You really liked that cop on Noveria, didn't you?"
I couldn't help sigh. "It was probably for the best we left when we did, Wrex, otherwise we would never have left. But even with her, I still though about..."
"You've got to let her go, Shepard." I met his eyes again. He simply met mine before adding, "Trust me on this, Shepard. Lived a long time. You've carried it around for long enough. You need to let the anger, pain, hurt, everything, just let it go. Otherwise it's just going to eat you up eventually, and you're going to miss out on so many good things. You have a whole host of women that adore you, and they expect nothing else except your company. That cop on Noveria? I know for a fact she loves you already. Shiala? I reckon she feels the same as well. As for all the other woman, let's just say I don't stand a chance if you were to actually return their interest."
"Wise words, Wrex."
"I'm a krogan, Shepard. We've dealt with nothing but anger and pain for a thousand years. But because of that, we can't afford what we would now call 'weak' emotions, things like love. We don't make love or anything like that. We breed, simply because we have to do everything we can to keep our numbers at least level. That's what the genophage has done to us." Then he sighed. "Shepard, I've been a warrior all my life, like my father before me. Yet there was a time when we krogan did experience such things as joy, laughter, love... The genophage took all of that from us. They've ripped out everything that made us krogan. Those left are nothing but shells, now fighting over the shattered carcass of what we once were." Damn, his words really got to me, not able to meet his eyes, his own voice heavy with emotion. I felt one of his hands grip my shoulder. "And I appreciate the fact my words impact you as they have, my friend. The fact you care means the world to someone like myself."
"What can I do to help?"
"At the moment, absolutely nothing. No-one cares, Shepard. If we were to wither and die, there would be a news report about our demise, but it would appear memories are long and no-one is even close to considering an end to the genophage." He sighed again. "Quite frankly, what was done to us was far crueller than simply just wiping us all out and ending it at the beginning."
I didn't say anything for a few minutes, going over in my head everything he'd just told me, before I finally straightened and turned to him. "I give you my word as an Alliance soldier, a Council Spectre, but most importantly as a human, I'll do whatever I can to help Wrex, if you do what you think you should do."
"You mean going home?" I nodded. "I haven't been back to Tuchanka in a long time now. Barely remember what it looks like. Last time I was there, it was nothing but ruins. Probably looks the same even after all this time."
"Let's see what happens regarding Saren. Once we take the bastard down..."
"I'll keep thinking about it, Shepard. See if I can make some contacts and if I still have some allies worth my time and day. If so, then maybe, just maybe, returning to Tuchanka is the right thing to do."
I left him alone with his thoughts, heading over to Garrus for a quick chat. He'd been in a good mood after boarding the
Normandy
after our last stop on the Citadel. I knew all about his relationship with Chloe, but knowing how awkward he could be about anything too personal, I didn't ask him bluntly about it, simply making sure he'd enjoyed himself on the Citadel.
After a chat with him, I thought I'd head into engineering, checking in with Chief Adams, who always appreciated the fact I'd take the time to walk around the ship and chat with the crew, reporting in that everything was absolutely fine as always, and if anything even went momentarily wrong, he had the crew to deal with it.
I could see Tali glancing my way every so often, so I thought I'd have a quick chat with her as always. She was busy typing away at her workstation as I leaned back nearby. She glanced up at me for a moment, figuring she smiled, before concentrating on her work again.
"So I understand you want to have some fun with Ashley?" The fingers immediately froze, which did amuse me a little bit. "I mean, I can understand why, Tali. Ash is an attractive woman. But where does Wrex fit in all of this?"
