Let's Be Batman

Tommy & Black Canary stood over The Calculator, menacing him. The effect would be terrifying on most others but The Calculator seemed unconcerned, even with the blood dripping from his eyebrow.

"Tell us who you're meeting!" Tommy said in his scariest voice. They had discovered earlier that week that the person who had been supplying Black Mask with money & men would be meeting with The Calculator. Tommy & Black Canary wanted to be know who that someone was.

But The Calculator was an enigma. He had been almost impossible to find. It was said that The Calculator found you rather than the other way around. But Barbara Gordon had found a small trail online and had followed it slowly but surely back to The Calculator. Tommy & Black Canary raced against the clock to find him and had succeeded; now they just needed to get him to talk.

"I'm sure you'd be very interested to find out," He said with a grin. "Alas, my clients are confidential. It would be bad for business for me to spill my secrets."

Tommy hit him again, perhaps a little too hard. He was annoyed; he hated smug fucks and this guy was the smuggiest fuck of them all. Calculator wiped his mouth of blood and smiled again.

"Punch me all you'd like, Batman, see how far that gets you," The Calculator said. Tommy was considering taking him up on his suggestion.

As Tommy interrogated their suspect, Black Canary moved to The Calculator's computer. It was large and cumbersome, with rows of screens and a man-sized CPU. It rivaled Batman's for sheer power and looked impenetrable.

The Calculator saw Black Canary looking at his computer and laughed. "You think you can break into my computer? Go right ahead. I have lots of time."

"No you don't," Black Canary said, "You have until tonight at 6PM. Then you have your meeting. Your meeting at... the corner of 112th & Belvedere."

For the first time, The Calculator looked concerned. "How did you figure that out? My encryption can't be cracked!"

Black Canary held up a yellow Post-it note. "You left this on your desk with 'Where my big meeting takes place' written above it."

The Calculator stared. "Oh... shit," He said softly. Tommy ended his suffering with a sharp crack to the jaw, knocking him unconscious.

"Well, we know when and where the meeting is but we still don't know with who," Canary said, stepping over The Calculator's unconscious body. She stood thinking, tapping her chin with her forefinger. Slowly, she seemed to form a plan.

"You know," She began, "We don't know who he's meeting but it's likely that they don't know who they're meeting either." She looked Tommy up & down. "How'd you like to go to a meeting?"

Tommy crinkled his brow. "Huh?"

Canary sighed. "Let's go. We need to get you ready."

***

Tommy stood uncomfortably on the corner of 112th & Belvedere, trying not to sweat. He held a briefcase in one hand and his other was dug into his pocket, fiddling with the small stung gun he was holding in case things went bad. From the top of the building next to him, Black Canary watched. Her voice rang in his ear.

"Relax," She said. "Even from here I can see you're nervous." Tommy tried to breathe.

"This was a bad idea," Tommy said. It had sounded good when Black Canary explained it to him, or at least the 3rd time she explained it to him when he actually understood it: no one knew who The Calculator was so it was simple for Tommy to take his place. They didn't know exactly what The Calculator was supposed to provide but his briefcase (tagged with a helpful Post-it note that read "Bring this to big meeting and also the code for the briefcase is 7-4-6") seemed to hold the key. All that was in there was a thumb drive that was encrypted that was, indeed, impenetrable. They kept it in the briefcase, just in case.

Tommy waited at the corner and checked his watch. It was 5:59. Any second now, something should happen...

At exactly 6:00PM on the dot, a limousine pulled up. The driver's door opened and a tall woman appeared. She walked around the front of the car and Tommy got a good look at her.

'Whoever this person is, they have an eye for talent,' He thought.

The chauffeur was a severe looking woman who was nevertheless incredibly hot. She had tight, thin lips and arched eyebrows that perpetually looked bemused. Her auburn hair was hidden underneath a chaffeur's cap. Her outfit was tight and almost fascist, folded over her breasts and fastened with numerous buttons down one side. It fit fast against her, accentuating her breasts and hips. The suit cut off right past the woman's hips, just barely long enough to cover the treasures beneath. Nude nylons covered her legs. Tommy tried to adjust himself; a suit was a lot less capable of hiding his erections than the Batsuit.

"Mr. Calculator," The woman said stiffly, opening the door to the limo. Tommy got in and sat down. The limo was long, with a back bench and two long benches running down the sides. At the end was a large television that took up the entire space. He looked around the limo and found... no one. There was nobody in the limo. The doors locked and the limo began to move.

"I'm not sure what's going on," Tommy whispered into his mic. He got back nothing from static. 'Fuck,' He thought, 'Something must be interfering with the comms.' He was starting to panic.

The limo drove for 10 minutes, turning here and there. Tommy couldn't see out the windows, they were tinted so dark, and he had no idea where he was. Finally the limo stopped. Tommy heard the engine cut. As he waited nervously, the door next to him suddenly opened. Instead of his mystery person, the chauffeur entered. She smiled thinly at him and scooted down a side bench, her skirt sliding up tantalizingly. She sat and crossed her long legs. And she waited.

'What the fuck...?' Tommy thought. On the outside he was trying to copy the cool attitude of The Calculator; on the inside, he was panicking. He wondered if maybe this was a set-up, if they knew who he was, if-

"Mr. Calculator, thank you for coming," A voice suddenly said. It was coming from the television, which had flickered on. Before Tommy was a serious-looking bald man. He was a little older but obviously took care of himself. With only one sentence Tommy knew that this man meant business.

"I'm sure you know who I am, if you didn't already know," The man said.

"Yes, I know exactly who you are," Tommy replied. Tommy had no idea who he was. He looked familiar, like he had seen his face a thousand times before, but to be honest Tommy didn't really care what guys looked like. He usually got distracted by a pretty face standing behind them anyways.

"I assume you have the information I asked for?" The man asked Tommy. He nodded and kicked his briefcase forward. The chauffeur grabbed it and clicked it open. She took the memory stick and moved forward in the limo; as she did so her skirt slid up and Tommy could black lace underwear. He crossed his legs.

The chauffeur plugged the memory stick below the television. The man looked to his right, presumably at his computer, and waited. As the information was unscrambled and transmitted, the man's eyebrows raised.

"This is.. very interesting," He said finally. He looked like he was trying very hard to hide his excitement. "Thank you, Calculator. Your money has been transferred to your account."

"No need," Tommy said. He tried to think like The Calculator. "I'm sure you've weighed the options of double-crossing me and determined it's best to pay me what we agreed upon."

The large face on the screen smiled. "Very good," He said. "Our business is complete. Thank you very much."

Tommy breathed hard through his nose. He couldn't wait to get out of here. He was sure that if he described the man to Black Canary she could probably guess who he wa-

"You know," The man said, "We could always use someone like you in my organization."

Tommy tried to play it cool. "Thank you but I prefer to keep my distance. You understand, of course."

The man tried to lay on the charm. "But you haven't heard my pitch yet. I can guarantee you more money than whatever you're making now. That's no object. Plus, there always the perks."

"...Perks?" Tommy asked, a little too dumbly. He tried to remember who he was supposed to be.

"Ms. Graves," The man said, "Please educate Mr. Calculator on the benefits of serving in my employ." Tommy peered questioningly at the chauffeur.

The chauffeur, apparently named Ms. Graves, nodded firmly and said, "Yes, sir. How would you like me to educate him?"

"The usual way. Thank you, Mercy," The figure replied.

Mercy Graves turned her legs to face Tommy. She smiled thinly at him, the smile clearly a formality. Then she slid out of her seat and dropped to her knees.

Tommy was about to ask her what she was doing when she shuffled over in front of him and put her hand on his dick. She massaged it roughly with her hand. As she did, she took off her cap with her other hand and placed it on the seat. Her brown hair was exposed; it was held to her head with clips.

Tommy tried to think of something to say but all he could do was grunt. His cock quickly hardened under Mercy's touch and he struggled to breathe normally. She undid his belt and then the button on his pants. Her hand gently slid the zipper on his pants down and then tugged at his pants. They slid down and his cock sprung free, standing tall in front of Mercy's face.

Mercy didn't express surprise like some other women Tommy had encountered; she didn't say, "Oh my God," or anything like that. Her eyes didn't even widen. Instead, her mouth dropped open just a half an inch. She quickly composed herself and wrapped her lips around Tommy's dick.

"Fuck," Tommy couldn't help but mutter. Mercy's hand wrapped around Tommy's shaft, jerking him slowly. The head of Tommy's cock filled Mercy's mouth and she swirled her tongue around it.

Mercy then threw herself back onto Tommy's dick, taking half of his cock in her mouth. Tommy groaned and put a hand on the back of her head, holding her there. He could feel spit sliding down his cock. He released her and she came back up, pulling him back out of her mouth. She teased the head of his dick with her tongue, flicking at it. Her hand quickly pumped his dick.

Tommy was enjoying his blowjob. Mercy was talented and she seemed eager to impress her boss. He placed his hand on the back of Mercy's head and forced her back down on his cock, his dick shooting up and into her throat. She took it well, not gagging at all. Tommy sighed and pumped his dick upwards into Mercy's mouth.

Mercy was no longer sucking his dick; her mouth was open wide, her tongue sticking out, willingly letting Tommy fuck her mouth. Her hands were on his thighs to balance herself as Tommy filled her wet mouth with his dick, a squicking sound emanating from her each time Tommy hit the back of her throat.

As Tommy throated the chauffeur, he suddenly became aware that the man on the screen was still there. Tommy felt extremely uncomfortable; the man stared intently, watching as Tommy used his assistant.

Suddenly, Tommy heard ragged breathing. He looked down and realized he had been holding Mercy down on his dick. She was breathing heavily out of her nose and her eyes were filling with water. He quickly let go of her head and she pulled back hard, his dick flying out of her mouth. She stared at him angrily and pumped his dick quickly, her spit lubricated her hand on his cock.

Tommy closed his eyes and enjoyed his handjob. There was something about using this stuck-up woman that drove him crazy. He loved seeing her once perfect lipstick smeared on his cock and her mascara running lightly down her cheek. Her hair was wild, pulled out of their clips and thrown every which way. The fact that she was angry about the way he was treating her made him even crazier.

"Let me see your tits," Tommy whispered to her. She continued jerking his cock furiously as she turned around and looked at her employed. He looked back at her without saying a word. She seemed to find the answer she was looking for, sighed, and undid the buttons on her suit. She undid them quickly, expertly, quickly unclasping all but the last button. Her shirt hung loosely and Tommy reached inside it, grabbing a breast roughly in one hand. He clasped onto it, kneading it in his hand. With his other hand he pressed onto the back of Mercy's head, guiding her back onto his dick. She looked at him one last time in anger before she closed her eyes and started sucking his cock once more.

Tommy bucked his hips into Mercy's mouth as she bobbed up and down on him, her hand stroking him in time with their rhythm. The feeling on his dick, her tit in his hand, the entire absurdity of the situation, it was all too much for Tommy. He could feel himself getting ready to cum.

He pumped his dick faster into Mercy's mouth and cried out as he came. His cum shot into Mercy's mouth and she moaned as she tried to swallow his load. She slurped noisily, catching the cum as it slid down Tommy's dick. She managed to get almost all of it, one drop of cum sliding out of her mouth and down the side of Tommy's large dick. Tommy released her head and Mercy pulled his dick out of her mouth, letting it slap against Tommy's stomach.

"Missed a spot," Tommy said, pointing to the leftover cum. Mercy looked at him annoyed, then slid her long tongue along Tommy's shaft, lapping up the last little bit of cum. Tommy shuddered at the sensation.

"Mr. Calculator," the man said, "I hope you understand now the pleasures that await you under my employ. I hope we can do business together in the future."

"Yes, sir," Tommy replied enthusiastically. He was pulling his dick back into his pants as he spoke. "Let me calculate the pros and cons and I'll get back to you with an answer."

The screen flickered and went black. Tommy buttoned up his pants and fastened his belt while Mercy tucked her now disheveled hair underneath her cap. She wiped her lips, taking off her smeared lipstick. Within seconds she looked completely composed. You never would have thought she had just been sucking cock.

"Thanks for the blowjob," Tommy said lecherously. Mercy frowned at him and opened the door to the limo. Clearly it was time for him to get out.

"I guess we'll be seeing each other in the future," Tommy said to her. He was enjoying himself too much. "And I calculate that we'll be doing this again."

Mercy frowned once again before her demeanor suddenly seemed to change. She looked around and then whispered, "I'd actually like that. Do you want my number?"

Tommy thought, shrugged, and nodded. He thought himself incredibly lucky.

Mercy motioned for Tommy to lean forward. He did so eagerly. Mercy herself leaned forward, her mouth close to his ear. "My number is-"

Mercy suddenly shoved Tommy, throwing him out of the limo. He landed with a thud on the pavement. Mercy smiled above him as she closed the door to the limousine. Tommy heard the door on the opposite side open and close. He watched Mercy's feet walk towards the front of the limo and get in the driver's seat. She pulled away quickly and left Tommy lying on the pavement.

Tommy smiled as the limo pulled away. He had gotten what he needed, he thought. He didn't know the head man's name but-

"Batman, are you there?" Black Canary's voice clicked over on the comm. "Where are you?"

"Batman here," Tommy replied. "I'm... not sure where I am." He looked around for some sort of sign or marker.

Canary's voice clicked back on. "Did you get a name?"

"Not the head guy," Tommy said. "But I did get a name of a subordinate. Know someone by the name of 'Mercy Graves?'"

There was silence on the other end. "Canary, you the-"

Black Canary cut him off. "Oh shit," She said.

From her tone Tommy could tell she was frightened. That frightened him in turn.

"I know Mercy Graves," Canary said, her voice slightly shaking. "She works for Lex Luthor."

Tommy definitely recognized THAT name. No wonder he recognized the face. Tommy thought to himself that he hadn't recognized the man earlier because if he had he probably would have shit himself.

"Oh shit," Tommy said.

***

The screen flickered black and Lex Luthor smiled slightly. He thought for a long moment, his hands forming an arch in front of him, before he finally typed something into his computer. The screen flickered back on and Luthor found himself staring at a woman. The woman's face was ghostly white but her eyes were a dark black. Around her mouth was a tattoo, or maybe it was a brand, that made her mouth look like it had been stitched up. Her white hair had two jet black strips running down them. She stared soullesly into the screen.

"Aye," She said, "What do ya want, Luthor?"

"I have a proposition for you," Luthor said. "I understand you are looking for a certain book. I can help you find it."

The woman's face somehow became more fierce. "Give me that book, Luthor, or I'll-"

Luthor motioned his hands for calm. "Relax, it's yours. But I need you to do something for me first. I need you to kill the Batman."

"That's not possible," the woman replied. "I need to know someone's identity to kill them. No one knows Batman's."

"Not an issue," Luthor said. He brought up the information The Calculator had given him. "I've taken care of that for you. His name... is Bruce Wayne. I trust you can handle the rest, Silver Banshee. Have a good time."

Her eyes still looked forward blankly but the woman's mouth formed into a smile.

"Aye, Lex," She said. "It'll be a scream."