"What's our status, Joker?" Jane Shepard asked, standing with her arms crossed behind her back, watching as the nose of the Normandy lifted up, with the dock eventually coming into sight.
"Lined up and ready. Just give the word, Commander, and I'll land this bird with an accuracy that would make a marksman jealous," Joker replied, not in the least bit shy about highlighting his talent behind the holographic control panel.
"I think Jeff means that we will land the ship without difficulty," EDI amended, swaying her crossed leg gently as she gave the green light to the control tower to enable the docking procedure.
"Did I?" Joker scratched his beard innocently, bringing the engines to a full stop when the Normandy came within a few metres of the magnetic clamps, using the reverse propulsion system to guide the ship into position, unsurprised when the loud thuds against the outer hull marked yet another perfect landing.
"You both have put in more than enough work this past week," Jane replied diplomatically, before Jeff got into yet another bickering match with the Normandy's former on board A.I., "a bit of shore leave will do the both of you some good. We all need to recharge after that mission."
"Technically, Shepard, this mobile platform is capable of sustaining a prolonged battery life using the kinetic motors located in the thigh joint-- "
"It's a figure of speech, EDI," Jane corrected with a smile, "I just mean that we have some time to unwind. Maybe you and Joker can take a trip over to Purgatory. Or you could book a room for the duration of our stay, if you want to relieve some stress in a slightly more physical manner."
"Ha-ha," Joker rolled his eyes, tapping a switch that caused a small compartment beneath the main console to pop open, which contained his crutches, "I think I'd prefer not to get my pelvis broken in two. Besides, there's a few upgrades I want to buy for the Normandy, one of the advantages that comes with having the company credit card."
"As long as you don't go too crazy," Jane smirked.
"And what about you?" Joker asked, shuffling himself out of his seat, resting the pads of the crutches under his arms. "Touring a Krogan battle cruiser isn't exactly what I call a good use of shore leave. Some of those old clunkers date back centuries, and the Krogans will spend hours going on about the battles it fought in, who used to be the captain before one of the many mutinies that have taken place."
"Well, the Alliance has made it clear that they want us to take every opportunity to improve relations between our potential allies and ourselves. Letting a Krogan Shipmaster take me on a tour of his ship is just a small part of that," Jane shrugged, though Joker didn't spot the small red tinge that appeared on her pale cheeks when she imagined what precisely the tour would entail.
"Well, I'd rather it be you than me, I don't want to spend hours on end having every bullet hole pointed out and explained," Joker said, planting the rubber feet of the crutches down, swinging himself towards the doors. "Now if you ladies will excuse me, I've got a date with a set of fusion couplings."
"Keep an eye on him, EDI," Jane asked once Joker departed through the decontamination chamber, "he's going to end up breaking another bone through sheer excitement alone."
"My sensors will be firmly honed in on Jeff, Shepard," EDI nodded, shutting down the last of the Normandy's non-vital systems. "And Shepard?"
"Yes, EDI?"
"I have taken the liberty to gather up at least six terabytes of data pertaining to Krogan physiology that you might find relevant," EDI tilted her head, presenting a smile that Jane could have sworn was a coy one. "It includes an abundance of information relating to their mating habits. For example, a Krogan male's sexual organ can range anywhere from eight to twelve inches in length, and up to three inches in diameter."
"EDI, remind me to block you from being able to access by Extranet search history," Jane paled.
"Duly noted, Shepard," EDI acknowledged.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~
Shepard arrived at the docking bay that contained the Might Of Tuchanka, a relic from a time when the Krogans were a true military force to be reckoned in the galaxy, rather than the hired muscle they had become known as since the deployment of the genophage.
The ship was close to a hundred meters longer than the SR2, with a more blatant focus on heavy weaponry and reinforced armour plating, designed for brutal ship to ship warfare rather then stealth. Though its main colour scheme consisted of a deep bronze, it wasn't hard to spot the layers of paint that showed through in spots where the ship had sustained heavy damage, with each colour representing the clan of the former captains.
Jane stared up at the ship with a certain degree of respect, astounded that it had somehow managed to stay in one piece despite the exhaustive efforts that had gone into its repairs over the centuries. There were sections where the entire outer layer of the ship's decks had been replaced, with weld scars and misaligned rivets adding to the severely asymmetric look of the Might Of Tuchanka. Even the individual rear engines appeared to be mismatched, with each one having been produced by different manufactures.
But it wasn't the exterior that Jane was interested in. She had been truthful to Joker when she gave her reason for the visit, with Alliance brass expressing their desire to craft an amicable relationship with the newly revitalised Krogans. Such a desire mainly consisted of trade deals, usually focusing on weapons shipments and supplies of replacement parts for their ancient hardware. In return, the Alliance would be granted safe access through Krogan controlled territory, allowing for greater access to planets that remained untapped of their minerals. There was even a direct line with Urdnot Wrex, with Jane having vouched for his reliability as an ally and a leader that could keep the Krogans in line.
Jane had every intention on inspecting the Krogan ship, out of an interest stemming from her captaincy of the Normandy. However, that didn't fully explain her decision to forgo the wearing of her traditional dress uniform. Instead, Jane had opted to wear the fashionable black leather dress that had been given to her by Kasumi for their infiltration of Donovan Hock's private party, an outfit that hugged her enviable figure to the fullest, contrasting with her pale skin. A pair of thin straps running over her shoulders were the only things holding the upper section against her sizeable bust. A thin, fashionable choker ran across her thin neck, a trend she had picked up from Miranda. She stood in a pair of tall black heels, which did little to bring her height anywhere close to that of a Krogan.
It was one of the rare occasions where Jane had decided to wear make-up, choosing a smokey atheistic that enhanced her emerald coloured eyes and high cheekbones. Her choice of lipstick enhanced her already full lips, providing her with a look that exuded seduction. Her glossy red hair had been freed from its typically tight bun, letting it sweep down to her exposed shoulders, resulting in a highly feminine appearance that would have made her entirely unrecognizable to her crew, aside from the Spectre issued pistol that sat against her hip.
Her appearance was by no means overly risque, it wouldn't have seemed out of place at Flux or any of the other high end clubs that could be found on the Citadel. But even Jane would have struggled to justify the look to anyone who inquired about it, with it being far from appropriate on a ship that was built for unadulterated warfare. The dress itself sent a very specific message, an implication that Jane was very much aware of.
The hatch door hissed open, blowing out a pressurised fog as it popped open. With a deep groan emitted by the old gears, the door slid open and allowed a small ramp to extend out towards the docking ramp. A set of heavy thuds could be heard from within, growing more prominent with each one, loud enough to resonate in Jane's chest. Suddenly, the unmistakable silhouette of a particularly large Krogan appeared in the frame of the door, with the glow of the Citadel dock's bright floodlights illuminating his battered armour.
"You Shepard?" the Krogan asked, staring down at the significantly smaller human.
"That depends, are you Captain Krach?" Shepard countered, feeling herself growing flustered as the Krogan assessed her. And from the way his eyes occasionally paused on certain sections of her body, she was sure it wasn't just her weapon that he was inspecting.
"Hmm, you're not exactly what I was expecting, where's your armour?" Krach inquired.
"Given that this is meant to be a friendly inspection, I decided to wear something a little more... informal," Jane explained, holding back a shiver as Krach's orange eyes very clearly landed on her exposed cleavage.