* This is part 1. Part 2 coming soon *
The phone rang loudly, disturbing the silence of his office. He sat in his cozy leather chair looking over today's newspaper. It was a nice, sunny day outside, yet he felt the morning chill creeping in through the open window. The phone rang again. He closed the newspaper and carefully laid it onto the coffee table. He stood up and walked over to the phone and waited for another ring. When the phone rang the third time, he snatched it up and brought it to his ear.
"Howard Stern speaking," he said calmly.
"Hey Howard, it's Mike!"
Howard recognized the cheerful voice right away. It was Howard's recruiter – the man who was responsible for getting people to appear on "The Howard Stern Show". Mike had a special task this time and it was taking longer than usual to find the willing participants.
"What's up Mike?" Howard asked.
"I've finally found enough participants!" announced Mike.
"Great," Howard said simply, trying to hide his delight.
"I tell you man, this was a difficult one. I know it took me longer that I promised, but I guarantee you – it was well worth it."
"Did you check their identities? Make sure they were all good? This is important."
"Of course! What do you take me for, an amateur? I have their birth certificates and I ran the background checks. This is as real as it gets. I'll fax those over to you right away."
"You're the best, Mike," Howard allowed himself a smile. "That's why you are my recruiter – always paying attention to details. It's settled then. Let's plan for this weekend. I'll get my crew and the studio ready." Howard opened his calendar a looked at it for a moment. "How does Saturday at four sound?"
"That works for me, Howard. I'll let the participants know."
"Make sure they are on time."
"I will," assured Mike. "Talk to you later, Howard."
Howard Stern hung up the phone and looked out of the open window, squinting. He walked closer to the window and breathed in the morning air. He wished he could remember where he put his sunglasses last night as the morning sun was already blazing bright. Saturday was three days from today and he began making plans on whom to call and what to prepare. He never really liked creating scripts for his shows, but he had a mind to make this show a little bit more interesting. A few moments later Howard Stern was enthusiastically calling up his loyal staff members to announce the show they would be shooting this Saturday.
On Saturday afternoon, Howard Stern entered his studio where he filmed all of his shows. He walked past a few members of the film crew that were already setting up the equipment. He proceeded over to his desk and checked his microphone. It was working well, as usual. Howard took out a stack of papers and looked over them – birth certificates, background checks, release agreements – everything looked to be in place. Then he opened up his notebooks and read over the script that he had prepared for himself. As he read, he marveled at his own brilliance.
Since this show had a very unusual topic, Howard decided to tell very few people about this shooting. It would be a small crew today – one guy to record the show, and two of his sidekicks: Robin Quivers and Gary Dell'Abate, also known as Baba Booey. Both of them were there for the other "It's Just Wrong" shows and Howard knew they would be comfortable with this one. He had warned his co-hosts ahead of time that this show would have a little twist to it.
The set-up crew departed after they finished preparing the video and sound equipment. The guy who would do the actual recording arrived shortly after. Howard trusted this guy – he had employed him for a very long time.
"There's the master himself!" sounded the cheerful voice of Robin Quivers as she walked into the studio with Gary Dell'Abate following in.
"Did you guys carpool here or something?" asked Howard looking up from his notebook.
"No, I found Gary on the corner of the building, trying to sell himself for sex," laughed Robin and Howard cracked a somber smile at Gary.
"Hey, a man needs to make a living and we all know that Howard doesn't pay us squat," said Gary as he walked over to his own desk and tapped his microphone with one finger.
"So Howard, another It's Just Wrong episode?" asked Robin raising one eyebrow.
"Yes. Mothers and sons this time," answered Howard nodding his head.
"Should be interesting," said Gary smiling broadly. "Have you met the contestants yet?"
"Not yet. They should be her at four. So I'm expecting them to show up soon," answered Howard.
"Sons stripping their own mothers," said Robin shaking her head. "There is nothing more wrong than that."
"I told you, Robin, this time there will be a twist," said Howard fixing Robin with a mischievous gaze.
"Howard, you dog!" laughed Robin "What do you have in mind? See if a mother will let her son squeeze her tits, like the brother and sister show?"
"Robin, dear, I have a lot more in mind than that," replied Howard.
"Oh, I like this!" exclaimed Gary, grinning broadly. "I like this a lot!"
"You two are the dirtiest men I've ever met," laughed Robin.
"You know you like it," jested Gary.
They spent the next fifteen, or so, minutes making small talk. When Mike finally arrived he waked in through the side door alone.
Gary spotted him first. "Hey, Mikey!" he shouted across the room.
"Gary. Robin. Howard." Mike nodded to each person in turn. "How are you all this fine afternoon?"
"Good, my man," replied Howard. "You are right on time."
"You guys are going to love me. I found some real gems for your show," said Mike.
"I checked out the birth certificates," said Howard. "The all look real."
"Of course they are real!" exclaimed Mike. "I always do what you ask of me."
Howard couldn't argue – the man was reliable.
"Excellent, then we should start right away," declared Gary, unable to hide his excitement.
Howard shifted his microphone closer to his mouth and said: "Test. Test."
Everything seemed to be ready.
"Where are the contestants?" asked Howard.
"In the hallway, waiting for my signal," said Mike. "Should I let them in?"
"On my signal," said Howard. "Are you staying for the show, Mike?"
"I would absolutely love to but you know me – always busy. I've got a meeting with another client in half an hour. You know that show biz people do not like to wait. Plus, I'm sure I can get a copy of the recording from you later, right?"
"You know it. Take care, Mike, and we'll begin on three," spoke Howard as he put his studio headphones on.
On the count of three the cameraman began rolling and Howard Stern did a small greeting to his listeners as usual.
"Today, we have a really special show for you all. It's Just Wrong has been such a big hit, that we decided to do another episode. So, let's begin with It's Just Wrong: Mothers and Sons."
