Getting Her Autograph

I've been a fan of Jenny McCarthy ever since I saw her in that first Playboy centerfold in 1993. In that plaid bra and panty set with the lacrosse stick? Man! Gives me chills to this day. She was in my area making a public appearance and having an autograph session on Thursday. When I found out about it, I took the day off work and made it a priority to be there.

While I stood in line for the autograph, I saw her. Pictures don't do her justice! Absolutely stunning. That long blonde hair just flows across her shoulders and down her back. She's got that smile that lights up the room and eyes that sparkle. Even seeing her from a distance I got a hard on.

She was seated at a long table. She would smile and greet every person like they were best friends. My mouth was getting drier and drier the closer I got. I had a serious case of star struck.

It was finally my turn. There she was! Right in front of me! She was wearing a tight pink t-shirt that said "Eyes Up Here" and made it quite obvious that her 34Ds weren't being restrained by a bra today. She could have signed objects with the nipples that were trying to tear through her shirt.

"Hey there, big fella!" she said smiling up at me. I'm not that big. Six feet tall, 250, and in excellent shape. Maybe that's how she greets all men.

"(gulp) H-h-hello, Miss McCarthy, it's a real pleasure to meet you," I stammered.

"Why are you so nervous?! I don't bite. Nibble maybe, but I don't bite," she said with a huge smile, making us both laugh. I handed her my mint condition October 1993 Playboy and asked if she would be kind enough to sign the cover and the centerfold. She picked it up and flipped through the pages. "Wow! Look at that! No sticky pages or anything! What? Did you just buy this or something?" Once again, anyone within ear shot laughed. She happily scrawled her signature in bold black ink and slid it back across the table to me.

"Um, may I, uh, come back there and get a picture with you?" I asked.

"Absolutely! Anytime I get a big, handsome man to hold me, I'm all in!"

She waved me around the table and a large security guard escorted me the few steps around. She met me halfway with a huge smile. She caught me off guard when she slid in front of me and not beside me. She grabbed my arms and wrapped them around her waist and then placed her hands on my arms. She scooted back and leaned into me.

She was actually a little taller but tinier than I had expected. She stands around 5' 7" so, in her heels, we matched up nicely. But she's only maybe 125-130 pounds. Those 34D-24-35 curves definitely felt good in my arms.

Damn! I could get used to this!

I thought. Then terror struck.

Fuck! I hope she doesn't feel my boner poking into her back!

Her publicist was kind enough to take a couple pictures using my phone. I started to let go but she held me just a few extra seconds. Maybe she was waiting for them to take another picture? I didn't know, but I wasn't going to complain.

When we finally broke our staged embrace, I grabbed my phone and said, "Thank you so much, Miss McCarthy! You've made my day."

"Call me Jenny! And you're welcome!" She paused, got a crooked grin, and whispered just loud enough for me to hear, "The feeling is mutual."

As I turned to leave, I caught her wink out the corner of my eye.

Was she winking at me?!

I was floating on a cloud. The large security guard escorted me back around the table, then grabbed my arm and stopped me.

"Miss McCarthy is going to take a break in about 15 minutes. She would like to speak with you in private if you're available."

I was stunned. I couldn't speak. My eyebrows nearly flew off the top of my head.

Am I available?! I'd miss my mother's funeral to be alone with her!

"Uh, yeah, sure, I'm available."

I was led through a set of curtains and then through a door that said "VIP" on the front. The room wasn't extravagant. It was well lit and smelled good. I took a big whiff.

Is that Jenny's perfume?

There was a couch, a couple of recliners, and a makeup table. A little table with treats and water was in the corner. The door to a private bathroom was along the back wall.

"Make yourself comfortable. Feel free to help yourself to some snacks or something to drink," the security guard told me. He started to walk out the door then stopped and turned to me with a half grin. "Oh, by the way, she likes dirty talk. The nastier the batter." He closed the door behind him.

She likes dirty talk?! What the fuck does that even mean?!

I grabbed a bottle of water and fell onto the couch. My heart was racing. I lifted my arm and sniffed my armpits.

Good, deodorant's working.

I huffed into the palm of my hand and breathed in deeply.

Wish I had a breath mint!

The door swung open. She walked through like she owned the place. The security guard was right behind her. "Oh good! You're here!" she said with a huge smile.

I jumped up from the couch and held out my shaking hand, fully expecting a cordial handshake. "H-h-hello, Miss McCarthy."

She blew past my hand, put her hands behind my head, pulled me down and planted a long, hot, wet kiss on my lips. Needless to say, I was shocked.

She broke away and giggled at the shock on my face. "Okay. First of all, you have to call me Jenny. Secondly, just relax. We're all friends here." I watched her heart-shaped ass wrapped in skin tight blue jeans walk away as she went over to the table and grabbed a bottle of water. "So sweety, what's your name?"

"Mark. Uh, Mark."

"Well, thank you for sticking around to come visit me, Mark Uh Mark." She laughed. I nervously laughed. She looked at the security guard. "Jimmy, why are guys always so nervous when they meet me?"

Jimmy shrugged his shoulders. "My guess would be because you're beautiful and famous."

She giggled and looked at me. "I never get tired of hearing that." She paused. "Okay, so let's get down to it. I need to get back out there." The next thing I knew, she had pulled her shirt over her head and had thrown it off to the side. She was standing there naked from the waist up. Her erect nipples were staring at me. Or was I staring at them? Regardless, she started to caress the tan globes and pinch her hard pointers. "So, what do you think? Do you like my tits?"

I picked my jaw up off the floor and cleared my throat. "Uh, uh, um, oh yeah, mmm hmmm, they look, uh, great."

She continued to play with them and looked down at them. "Do they look better in person or in the magazines?"

"(gulp) Um, definitely better in person."

"That's sweet of you to say! 'Cause, you know, they airbrush that shit like crazy on a lot of girls." Then she got that look in her eyes and nodded at me. "Okay, now let's see yours."

My mind raced. "My...my...you want me to take off my shirt?"

She laughed and shrugged her shoulders. "Sure! That's not what I meant, but yeah, sure. That's fair, I guess."

Not what she meant?

I pulled my shirt off and tossed it onto the couch with hers. Fortunately, I still stayed in shape. I didn't have cut abs or anything like that, but I had definition.

"Mmmmmm, nice," she purred. "But that's not really what I wanted to see." She paused. "What I really want to see is your cock."

My heart stopped. "My...my..."

A crooked grin crossed her face. "Cock. Your cock." She looked at my crotch then back at me. "When I backed up against you I felt that bad boy on my back. I thought it was going to stab me in the kidney," she giggled and moved towards me. "So now I want to see it." She grabbed the belt of my pants and expertly had it unbuckled in seconds. I gasped when she unsnapped my pants and nibbled on my nipple. "Didn't Jimmy tell you?" She looked back at Jimmy shrugging his shoulders. "Jimmy, you bad boy." She looked up at me as I heard the zip of my pants. "Big hard cocks make me horny as fuck. And I haven't had a good fucking yet today." My body stiffened when her hand wrapped itself around her object of desire inside my pants. If only he was as stiff as my body right now. "You're not hard? My tits didn't make you hard? You're not gay are you?"

I panicked. "No! Oh no! No no no. It's just, uh, you know..."

She smiled. "A little nervous?" I nodded my head. "Maybe this will help you relax."

She dropped to her knees, grabbed the waistband of my pants and underwear, and slowly pulled them down. And down. And down. Her target finally fell out. Luckily, I'm gifted in that area. Under normal circumstances I'm a thick nine inches long. Even only partially inflated at the moment, I was still larger than the average male.

Her soft stroking had it growing quickly. She smiled, quite satisfied with her choice of partners today. "Mmmmm, I knew it. Now let's see if we can get this thing up to full song."

I felt her hot breath rush across the tip of my tool just before she took me in. I gasped, then gasped again as my trousers fell down around my ankles. To no one's surprise, the woman knows how to suck dick. Her mouth was hot. Her red lips slid up and down the shaft of my rod like smooth silk. She molested her tits and pinched her nipples while she worked. Her hums and slurps bounced off the walls. She'd pull me almost all the way out, then roll her tongue around the purple tip. Her tongue flicked at the hole at the end of my hose as if she was trying to encourage it to unleash its contents. I grew quickly in her mouth.

When I grew to full length, she was able to take most of me in, but not all. She'd throw her face forward and then hold it there. I could feel the swollen tip press against the entrance to her throat. After several bobs she pulled me out with a pop. A string of saliva followed her tongue until it snapped in two and fell across her incredible tits.

She looked up at me with a crooked grin and licked her lips. "I'm not done yet."

I watched her as she took me back in, still amazed I was in this situation. My tip slammed against the edge of her throat three more times. Then it happened.

My head flew back. "Fuuuuuuuck!" I moaned.

I could feel her smile when she took me into her throat. My balls slapped against her chin again and again. Only two women in my life had been able to deep throat my thick cock. Now it was three.

Don't cum! Don't cum! Don't cum!

I thought to myself.

After several moments she pulled her face off of me. She swiped her forearm across her chin with a very self-satisfied look on her face. "I knew I could do it," she said smiling. "I'm impressed. Most guys have shot their load by now." She paused, then looked up at me with a sideways grin and a twinkle in her eye while she softly stroked me. "I'll let you in on a little secret. The longer you can last, the more you will be rewarded for your efforts."

A shiver of excitement ran up my spine.

The longer I last, the more I'll be rewarded.

I grinned back at her. "That sounds like a challenge."

She giggled. "Oh, it's a challenge alright." She cupped her breasts. "How would you like to fuck my tits? You want to fuck my big, fat titties, Mark?"

I nodded. "Um, uh, I...I...yes, yes I think I would."

She sexily giggled again and leaned into me. She dropped two streams of saliva into her ample cleavage and then spit on the head of my snake. She took me into her cleavage with workmanlike precision and wrapped her globes around me. Oh my God! They were so warm and soft!

Don't cum! Don't cum! Don't cum!

Ever so slowly, she started to slide her body up and down, all the while staring up at me and licking her lips. I was long enough that the head would pop in and out of the top of her cleavage like a gopher from his hole.

"You think you would?" she purred with a grin. "You're not sure if you want to fuck my tits?" she asked while we did exactly that.

"No no! That's not what I meant! I mean...I, uh..."

"Tell me you want to fuck my tits, Mark. Tell me you want to fuck my tits with your big, fat cock."

The nastier the better! That's what he meant! Okay, I can play that game.

But I was a little unsure just how far she wanted to go.

Better play it safe.

I cleared my throat. "Jenny...I, uh...I'm gonna fuck your big ol' titties with my big, fat cock."

She smiled while she continued to bounce. "Mmmmmm, that's better. What else? Are you gonna blow your load all over my face? Maybe all over my tits?" She dropped another stream of saliva.

Okay. Let's see how far she wants go with this.

I shook my head no.

She had a slightly surprised look on her face. "No?"

I felt a wicked grin grow across my face. "No, uh uh, not yet anyway."

I haven't had a good fucking yet today.

"First I'm going to fuck that tight little pussy of yours until you scream my name. Then, if you beg me to, then I might cover those fat fucking tits in cum."

A chill ran up her spin. Her pussy was instantly soaked. Her body went white hot. "Is that right? Do you think you're man enough to do that? You think you're man enough to fuck my pussy hard enough to do that?" she asked with her mouth while her eyes said "I hope so!"

"If you're lucky, you'll find out soon enough."

She giggled. She squeezed harder and bounced faster. "Mmmmm, you think so? You don't think I can make you cum with my tits?" She tilted her head down and took my head into her mouth each time it popped out of her cleavage.

Fuck me! She's testing me! She's gonna try to make me cum! Fuck!

"I've fucked bigger tits than these...right before I shoved my cock in their cunt and had them begging for more." I lied. Her tits were fabulous.

Shit! Did I go too far with that one? Don't' cum! Don't cum! Ummmm,

artichokes. Broccoli. Green beans...

She looked up at me. "Mmmmm, lucky girl."

She bounced and sucked for several more minutes. "Give up yet?" I asked in a mocking tone.

She lifted her head. "Oh, you're good," she said with a smirk. "Okay, let's see it. You talk a good game. Let's see if you can back it up."

I helped her to her feet and looked down at her. "On no you don't. Not so fast."

She looked back at me with a quizzical but amused face. "Oh really now? What did you have in mind?"

"Before you find out, we need to get you naked. Why don't you do a strip tease for me?" She only had her pants on, but I had no doubt this would be something to behold nonetheless.

She tilted her head slightly while I stroked myself. "A dance, huh? Okay."

Everything she did was in slow motion. She started to shimmy her hips and wiggle her shoulders. Her tits bounced and swayed. She unbuttoned her jeans. Lowered the zipper. Started to pull them off her waist. She spun around and shook her heart-shaped ass at me. The pants dropped more, revealing a little black thong. They slid down her silky thighs. She bent at the waist and stared back at me with a huge grin, making sure I was enjoying the show. She bent over more. She was almost doubled in half. The swollen pink lips of her pussy were quite obvious. She stepped out of her jeans with her back to me still. She repeated the whole thing with the thong. My cock was throbbing. She was finally completely naked, looking over her shoulder at me with the most mischievous look.

Turn around! Turn around!

She finally, slowly, turned around. I was speechless. She was staring back at me with a "fuck me" look on her face. She had a thin landing strip of blonde hair above her glistening snatch which she started to tenderly rub.

"Happy now?" she cooed.

I nodded. "Very."

We admired each other for a moment before she broke the silence. "So what did you have in mind, lover?"

I motioned to the couch. "Have a seat and I'll show you."

She sat down on the couch tingling with anticipation. I knelt down in front of her and parted her legs. I moved in closer, watching her reaction. My face moved in the direction of her "V". Her eyes got wider. Her smile grew bigger.

"Wait. Are you kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me?" She could barely contain her laughter.

I grinned back at her. "Do I look like I'm kidding?"

"I give you the chance to fuck me and you're gonna lick my pussy? Are you fucking kidding me? This is a first. Most guys can't wait bury their dick in me."

"Hmmmmm. Well, I'm not like most guys. First I'm going to make to cum with my tongue."

She giggled. "You think so, huh?"

I nodded. "Mmmm hmmmm. Then I'm going to bury my cock in you so far you're gonna feel it in your throat."

'"You think so, huh? We'll see about...OH SHIT!"

Before she could finish her thought my face was buried in her lap. My face was the only thing that kept her from levitating off the couch.

Her clit was easy to find. She might've had the biggest, hardest clit I've ever experienced. It shivered on my tongue as soon as I hit it with my first lick.

This isn't going to take long

I thought to myself. In no time she was grinding her groin into my face. She had one hand on the back of my head pulling me in while her other hand roughly molested her own tits.

"Oh yeah! Oh fuck yes! That's it! Lick my pussy! Like my nasty little pussy!" she moaned. She groaned, cursed, and squirmed while I lapped her up.

I slid a finger in under my tongue until it was buried knuckle deep. "Oh fuck yes! Mmmmm hmmmm! Stick another finger in in my cunt! Stick as many fingers as you can in there to get me ready for that fat cock of yours!" I slid a second then a third finger in. She screamed with pleasure. ""Oh gawd, I can't wait for you to fuck me with that big, fat cock of yours! C'mon! I want you to fuck me!" I glanced up at her while I slapped her slit and shook my head no. "Oh, you bastard!"

I pulled my fingers out. Her cunt was quivering on my lips. "Wait...what! No, don't stop!" I flicked her excited clit. "Fuck!" My slick finger circled her puckered anus. Her body shivered. "Oh! Ohhhhhh...now you're going to tease my ass?! Oh, you bastard!" she said smiling down at me. She was panting hard. "Go ahead...go ahead and shove it up my ass. I dare you! If you're lucky, I might even let you...oh shit!"

Her back door swung open and I slipped my finger through fast and hard. Her head flew back into the cushioning of the couch. I began to fuck her ass like a piston. She was getting close, I could tell. I slid my tongue up and gave her aching clit several hard smacks. "Oh yeah! Oh gawd! Oh fuck!" I quickly sucked her raging clit between my lips and swatted it with my tongue.

Her body nearly levitated off the couch. Both of her hands went to the back of my head. "Oh fuck! Oh fuck! Ohhhhhhh shit! Ohgawd! Ohgawd! Ohhhhhhgawdgaaaaa!"

Her juices flowed down my chin while her hips bucked into my face so hard I thought whiplash was a real possibility. I continued to suck, flick, and fuck while her body slowed.

Finally, nearly out of breath, she grabbed the back of my head and started to pull. "Oh God! Stop! I...I...oh shit! I can't...take...ugh! Anymore..."

I pulled my head out of her lap and looked at her with a huge grin. I swiped my forearm across my face. Her eyes were closed and she licked her lips. Her fabulous chest heaved while she sucked in as much air as possible.

"Holy shit," she panted, looking at me with a wicked grin. "If you can fuck anything like you lick pussy, I'm in trouble."

I looked back at her with a crooked smile. "Better."

"Oh shit," she purred.

I stood up, lifted her legs, and parted them. My rock hard tool twitched. I started to lean into her.

"Oh! Wait! Shit! Let me catch my breath!" I smiled and shook my head no. I touched my tip to her still trembling lips. "Oh...oh...oh shit!" I pushed forward. The swollen head of my pulsing cock slid through her slit like a hot knife through butter. Her back arched and her eyes closed. "Oh fuuuuuuuck!" she cried while a slid into her.