Nate sat in his truck in a quiet, yet scathing rage. His blood furiously boiled as he rested his head on the wheel, gripping it so tightly that his knuckles turned white. All he could do was focus on his shallow breathing as violent thoughts raced through his clouded mind. His public humiliation wasn't subtle, and he knew it would be a subject that no one would ever forget. At least no one who saw Lexi's play that night. His sexuality had been cruelly and unambiguously mocked; turned into the cheapest type of joke. And he knew it would be a lingering resentment that would fester in him.
He left the auditorium and headed straight for East Highland Park. He needed to be alone. He needed to gather his thoughts before he did something he would regret. But one surprising revelation dawned on him as he sorted through his inevitable fury: Nate didn't know exactly whom to be angry at. So much had happened this year, and all he could think to do in that moment was to get away from everything and everyone. At least for a little while. It wasn't a solution. He knew that. But he simply couldn't face reality. Not yet.
The sketchy park was empty. Nate sorted through his emotions in the parking lot, thinking of everything he had done in recent memory. He closed his eyes as all the people he had hurt came to mind all at once. How could he not live with a profound sense of guilt? What had he become? He opened his eyes and saw the bench where Jules had been waiting for him that night. He stared blankly at it. Nate did what he could to make amends with her, but he knew he had crushed her. And Maddy. And Cassie. Like his Father, he seemed to destroy everyone he got close to. And he knew it.
Nate was 18. As far as he was concerned, he was a man. He had assumed the position of being the man of his house. Going to Lexi's play that night was a way to escape the dire responsibilities he would inevitably have to confront: Would he have to get a job to support his mother and brother? Would he still be able to go to college? Would he have to take over his father's business? Was that even possible? Would his father's trial get press? Would all his recordings be used as evidence and be made public? Would Nate have to make a statement? Was he legally vulnerable for blackmailing Tyler? Would he have to break up with Cassie? Would he call out Lexi? Get back with Maddy? Call Jules? It was meant to be a night of relaxation, and it turned into utter indignity.
Nate sat still until he heard his phone go off again. He closed his eyes and sighed when he received the text message, since he assumed it was Cassie. Nate was desperate for just one minute of peace. He wanted a moment to reflect, and he couldn't even have that. He irritably picked up his phone to read the text, but then saw something he didn't expect. It was from an unknown number. He unlocked his phone to read the text message. He was confused. Stunned, even.
Because he couldn't stop reading the text message over and over.
***
Samantha took a sip of her first glass of red wine for the evening as she stepped into her immaculate bathtub. The water was warm and the bubbles were plentiful. She had tied her hair in a messy bun as she attempted to relax in her uncommonly quiet house.
Sebastian and Theo left earlier that day. Samantha convinced Sebastian that he needed to make time for his son, especially now that Maddy would no longer be coming around. Theo pretended it didn't bother him all that much, but Samantha could tell he was heartbroken by the prospect of never seeing his beautiful babysitter again. They had grown closer than Samantha had anticipated, and there was no way to easily relieve the pain of a first heartbreak. Samantha thought a weekend camping trip would be perfect for the two of them, and Sebastian wholeheartedly agreed. It would be an opportunity for them to bond, and she knew Sebastian would do his best to give Theo advice on these kind of unbearable realities.
She heavily sighed as she stared at the ceiling. The silence was something she had hoped to indulge in peacefully, but she didn't predict that it would trigger what had already been a gnawing feeling that she simply couldn't shake:
Samantha had not been entirely honest with Maddy on the night they went for a casual, late night swim together.
Maddy felt so grateful she had someone she could talk to about her tribulations, and Samantha had done her best to assure her that being attracted to toxic men like Nate was more of a phase rather than a doomed, permanent state of being. Of course, Samantha did not know the extent of Nate's psychopathic tendencies, but, as far as she was concerned, Maddy needed guidance like any young woman would need. Although, Samantha had to admit to herself that she knew she hadn't told Maddy everything about her own dramatic dilemma in college.
Lying in her bathtub, remembering old flings, wasn't exactly what Samantha had planned on doing this evening, but there she was: holding a glass of red wine in her warm bathtub, scrolling through this old college fling's social media account on her phone. Seeing him with his wife and three kids wasn't exactly exhilarating, but she also couldn't deny that he had aged well. Very well. While she had expressed to Maddy that there was deep regret about betraying her friend, she purposefully did not mention that her friend's boyfriend was one of the best lovers she ever had. It wasn't just that he was extremely good looking and that she found him unforgivably sexy, but it was the taboo of it all. She had to admit to herself then and now that she was turned on by the power complex. Samantha liked feeling superior, and betraying her friend was a massive turn on in bed. Being told and shown she was better and prettier than her friend got Samantha off. She had never cum harder. Not before, nor since.
It didn't even cross her mind to send a message to this old college fling, but she couldn't help but type in Nate's name into the search bar. She was curious. His profile came up right away, and her eyes widened. She took another sip of wine.
Sebastian was a loving, faithful husband, but Samantha was bored. She had been bored with him for longer than she cared to admit. He had provided an amazing lifestyle for her and their child, but he wasn't exciting to her. He never had been. Sebastian was security. And Samantha was a recovering mess: she had been to therapy, studied Eastern religions, travelled the world on other people's dimes, relentlessly explored yoga, and was far more stable than she had been in her 20's. She admitted to Maddy that she didn't really fight with Sebastian. And that was a problem. There was so little passion she had for him at this point, even though she knew, intellectually, he was good for her.
None of this was news to her, but going out and spending time with her girlfriends more and more did transport Samantha back to a time when she had little to no responsibilities. But, more than that, it reminded her of when she was truly free. When she was free to do what she wanted, how she wanted, and whom she wanted.
She scrolled through Nate's social media.
Maddy has excellent taste, Samantha thought. But not just in men. Samantha knew that Maddy came from rough personal circumstances, and that she viewed Samantha's life in an almost fetishized way. Samantha represented what Maddy's life could be if she made the right decisions. She was a model to Maddy in many respects, which is why she gifted her the purple dress Maddy loved and encouraged Maddy to move on and never, ever look back. Maddy had to find her own path if she wanted it to resemble Samantha's life. Because, in a sense, that is what Samantha had to do. Samantha didn't come from poverty. She was born wealthy and married wealthy. But, emotionally, she had to abandon the person she was in order to evolve into the person she had now become. It was a great, yet unsatisfying life.
Originally, it was for precaution but, Samantha had been spying on Maddy with cameras set up around the house. That's how she knew Maddy had been trying on her jewelry and dresses. It's why she gave her the purple dress at their final meeting on the bleachers that day. Maddy had never stolen anything, and she treated every item delicately and with respect. But Samantha had been crafty that night they went for a swim. When Maddy went to use the bathroom, she unlocked Maddy's phone and took a picture of both Nate's number and Cassie's. She wasn't quite sure why at the time, but she thought the information might come in handy just in case.
Samantha became quickly fixated on Nate's pictures as she scrolled through his social media account. God, he was gorgeous, she thought. He had the perfect body. And given everything Maddy had told her, he was absolutely the type of young man she used to hook up with time and time again. Was he like her former best friend's boyfriend? She didn't know for sure. But as she scrolled through his account, she became more and more intrigued.
And perhaps it was curiosity that got the best of her because she took a deep breath, finished her glass of wine, and decided to text him.
***
Nate got out of his truck and stood across the street from Samantha's house. He took his phone out of his pocket and read Samantha's text again:
Hi Nate. This is Samantha. Maddy's boss. I wanted to speak with you about Maddy. Meet me at my house tonight. But don't tell her. She doesn't know. I want to keep it that way.
