Saturday, July 20, 2013
I finally felt like I had things down pat at Comic Con, at least with my clothes on. I did get some sleep, but woke up quickly and got a good place in line for the "How I Met Your Mother" panel.
I didn't dare to try and make direct eye contract with Cobie, who carried on as if she didn't swallow my cum last night. But when I raised my fist while the audience sang along with "Let's Go To The Mall" I chose to believe that singled me out to her. Regardless, I left the audience at the end without daring for more.
For a moment, I was emboldened enough to consider standing in line for the big Marvel panel – which included the Captain America 2 panel with Cobie. And Scarlett Johansson as an added bonus. But there was no way the line wouldn't be far too big by now, so I put those thoughts out of my head.
I browsed through the convention, got dinner, then went back to browsing – until I felt a tap on my shoulder. When I turned around, I saw that the source was a security guard who wasn't alone. After he confirmed my name, he and his partner said I had to come with them.
They took me to a secluded part of the building, which made me briefly think that this felt like S.H.I.E.L.D. abducting me. But S.H.I.E.L.D. never beat up or banned someone on screen, and that was a possibility here for one reason or another. If people close to Yvonne or Cobie found out my....activities and had justifiable cause for revenge....
I tried not to visibly shudder near my abductors. When I cleared my head, I actually took note of my surroundings, noting that they led me towards some backstage. As I went deeper, I dared to rule out a revenge wacking, yet this made it more confusing.
Until I saw what was beyond the backstage – the filled auditorium for Hall H, location for the Marvel panel. "Why am I here?" I asked my guards, although I could fill in some blanks myself.
"We were just told to find you and make sure you got here. And make sure all those people in line didn't see us do it. Guess you helped us by not standing in line," the guard explained.
"It wasn't planned out like that," I said in awe.
"Just go take a standing room only seat without getting noticed," the second guard explained. "We're also supposed to get you to an after party later, so don't go anywhere."
I wasn't planning on it, perhaps because I couldn't think of any plans right now. I just went towards the auditorium, took the first seat I could find – although I didn't have the best view – and tried to take this latest twist in.
Obviously this was for the Captain America panel, and it was obvious who got me in. I didn't know if I'd be allowed to stick around for the Avengers panel afterwards. But if Cobie had arranged to get me here – and arranged to see me again at a party, despite how iffy that could turn out – this was beyond the Avengers' billion dollar scope.
I tried to put that aside and enjoy my second panel of the day, while I still could. Cobie was there, though she was less likely to notice me this time, and I could even enjoy seeing Scarlett Johansson in person.
When the panel ended, no one came to get me, so I assumed I could watch the rest of Marvel's presentation. Once it ended and Joss Whedon told us Avengers 2 was titled "Age Of Ultron", the guards finally escorted me while the audience filed out.
I followed them until I got to a lavish, Marvel themed party hall. By the time I finished gawking, the guards were gone and I realized I had no idea what to do. Was I brought here just to see Cobie, or was I allowed to just hang around with anyone? And what the hell could I say if someone asked me how I got in?
I walked around pondering those questions for a few minutes, not daring to greet any famous person yet. Eventually I reached a bar, then looked back and finally saw Cobie far away in the crowd. But she was with her husband, so there was no way I was taking that risk – whether she wanted me to or not.
"Hey there," a female voice interrupted my limited train of thought. A voice I swore I heard back at the panel – and in various other places.
This time, I knew I was seeing a celebrity and not someone in costume right away – and not just because Tom Hiddleston was the only costumed one here as Loki. Scarlett Johansson was indeed there next to me, with her costume being her flowery Versace dress.
I should have been more nervous seeing her than Yvonne or Cobie at first. Especially since this was the biggest star of the three – and the most drooled over, for good reason. But after these last two nights, the shock factor of famous women talking to me was starting to wear off. Getting naked for me, however....
I shook that off and tried to start off normal with a celebrity, for once. "Hi. Great party for a great panel," I said semi-normally.
"Thanks. Still a long way to go with the party, though. Let's hope it stays great," Scarlett said.
"Still, looks really good so far," I said – with a double meaning that wasn't completely on purpose. Yet I tried to think of another topic quickly, and settled on, "There is something I should get out of the way early."
I took out my notepad of signatures and asked Scarlett to add hers. Once she agreed, I gave her my pen and turned the page – not realizing it was the same page Cobie signed until Scarlett was done.
"I see I'm in familiar company," she commented, once I saw the page and realized I had some dancing around to do.
"Yep. Um, got that after her TV panel," I covered up.
"You waited for her autograph, then stood in line for our panel? How'd you make it on time to get a seat?" Scarlett logically poked holes in my lie.
"I had luck on my side, probably," I poorly answered.
"So that's Cobie's new name," Scarlett quipped, then broke out into a laugh – the last thing I was having so far. "Relax. I know Cobie got you in there, and in here. She said you talked to her last night and helped her get settled in. So she asked me to help you settle in here."
I wondered why she couldn't do that herself, until I remembered she was already with her husband and friends. I wondered why she asked Scarlett to do it, and wondered if "talked to her" was what she really said about what I did. Answers to those questions were harder to remember and figure out.
In the meantime, I tried to be courteous and told Scarlett, "You don't have to go to that trouble."
"Guys like you go to the trouble to see these movies. Makes stuff like this possible. So this is the least I can do," Scarlett commented. In a way, I couldn't argue with that, so I ignored the ways in which I could.
I kept ignoring them as Scarlett showed me around the party, let me meet a few of her other co-stars, and stuck by my side most of the way through. This seemed like going above and beyond for a friend – I couldn't have been that impressive meeting the old and upcoming Marvel heroes, and I was sure my nerves showed around Joss Whedon.
Yet Scarlett still put up with my geeking out, even as the party neared its end. As I took that in, I wanted to see if Cobie had already left – although I hadn't thought to peek for her in a while. But with the crowd starting to file out, it was clearer that she wasn't there.
"Have you had enough? Do you wanna go?" Scarlett asked, once she saw I was looking away.
I thought it over, as she didn't qualify if I wanted to leave, or leave with her. So I answered, "You've been my gracious guide here. I'll go whenever you want me to go. Or when you want to go, that too," I corrected.
"Well, we'll still have to get through a crowd when we go. I know a shortcut out, though. I can show you so you'll be ready," Scarlett offered.
With no better ideas on what to do, I accepted and followed Scarlett to the back of the room. She went to a door and opened it, and I followed her into what looked like a storage closet. There was another door on the wall that Scarlett opened, showing me I was at the back of the convention building, with less of a crowd outside.
"All right, I think I can memorize this route. Thanks again," I told her. "And if you run into Cobie, please thank her for me too."
"I think you thanked her pretty good already. At least from how she explained it," Scarlett stated – clearly with more than one meaning.
I tried to tell myself she couldn't mean what I thought. "Yeah, she told me about your private screening too," Scarlett broke my delusion.
"Why would she do that?" was my first response. Not to deny it, or to ponder that Scarlett Johansson heard about me fucking her co-star – or that Cobie might have made me sound pretty good. But this response sounded better to say out loud.
"That's how it works. Except for that one time in Spain, but we got past that," Scarlett confused me further.
"I....didn't know you were that close," was my next futile comment.