Celebrity Tag Team Sexy Summer Bout

Sandra Bullock, Jennifer Aniston, and Robyn Moore square off against...

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"Game Over!"

Best played out on a big screen TV or a wide screen computer with the lights off, so that you aren't distracted and don't miss any of the summertime fun and realistic action of this make believe, erotic, play land paradise recreated just for you. It was a beautiful summer day like any other summer day, when they all lined up to fork over their $100 to buy their copy of the new X-rated game, Celebrity Tag Team, Sexy, Summer Bout, except for one thing, none of it was real. Or was it?

You couldn't tell it wasn't real from watching it or from playing it. What if it were all real and not just some silly computer game? Turn on the lights and don't toss out your Xbox, yet, because think about it, how do you think they made this game in the first place? Duh?

What if Sandra Bullock, Jesse James' ex-wife, Jennifer Aniston, Brad Pitt's ex-wife, and Robyn Moore, Mel Gibson's ex-wife were scheduled to square off against Michelle McGee, Jesse James' tattooed girlfriend, Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt's current, tattooed wife, and Mel Gibson's tattooed ex-significant other, Oksana Grigorieva. What is it with bad women and tattoos? I like it. Bring on the tramp stamps or is that stamped tramps?

A dream celebrity tag team sexy summer bout come true, is it real or imaginary? Is the whole thing just a game for your in-home entertainment? You may not want to play this game with the kids, as it was 18-years-old or older ID required to buy it. Bring your camera, we may need a scorecard for this group.

In your dreams. Even though any of the women listed above may secretly long to have a face-to-face eye gouging, head banging, hair pulling, and clothes tearing confrontation with the woman, who've been talking trash about her in the press, the women they've grown to despise, this wrestling match would never happen. Of course, none of these women would agree to such a match but, if they agreed to having such a match, would you pay to watch it on Pay-Per-View TV? A knockdown, drag out, hopefully X-rated, nude, sexy, summertime bout, how much would you pay to watch the wrestling match of a lifetime between these six women?

It sounds farfetched but, realistically, with nothing to gain and more to lose, why would Sandra Bullock, Jennifer Aniston, and Robyn Moore wrestle in a celebrity tag team, sexy, summer bout against the likes of Michele McGee, Angelina Jolie, and Oksana Grigorieva? Except for Michelle McGee and Oksana Grigorieva, perhaps, they all have more to lose than to gain. Except, maybe for, Michele McGee, none of them need the money.

For sure, once Oksana settles her civil lawsuits and wins a hefty child support settlement from her ex-boyfriend, the father of her love/hate child, mega-millionaire Mel Gibson, she won't need the money that this kind of publicity would surely bring her. Not bad for just spreading her legs and pretending to be sincere, when she told Mel that she loved him, when we all now know she didn't love him and she never loved him. She more loved the riches that having Mel's baby could bring her. She played the poor guy for all that she could get from the rich man.

Then, as her swansong, to discredit him in the eyes of the public and to receive the sympathy from battered women everywhere, when finally done with him, she pushed his buttons to guarantee that she left this relationship as a rich woman. Oksana, no doubt, will disappear into oblivion with her money, that is, until she latches on to another rich, older man to drive insane, until he threatens to kill her, just as she did with Timothy Dalton and now Mel Gibson. Talented not as an actress, a singer, or a musician, she has a gift of bringing out the worst in men.

Yet, what if it was proposed to the six women that all the proceeds of this staged event would go to their favorite charities of choice? Would they agree to wrestle then? Do they care more about their special charities than they do about their careers, their reputations, and the public's perception of them?

Without doubt, they care more about their careers, their reputations, and the public's perception of them, than they do about their favorite charities. Without doubt, they'd all say no to fighting such a match. Their lawyer, manager, agent, and/or the business adviser, would never allow them to fight in a celebrity, tag team, sexy, summer bout. Why would they even contemplate such an absurd public spectacle? Who would even dream up such a debacle, but me, a writer of erotica?

What if they were humiliated in the ring? What if they had their asses handed to them? What if they were stripped naked? Be still my heart. What if while humiliated, had their asses handed to them, and were stripped naked in the ring? Wow.

Now we're talking. Definitely, this is a tag team sexy, summer bout worth seeing. Wouldn't you pay more to see these three famous and three infamous celebrity women wrestle, while hoping and praying for them to be stripped naked? For sure, this would eclipse the Tonya Harding boxing match and even the Pamela Anderson sex tape with her husband Tommy Lee. How much more would you pay to see any and all of these six women naked? No doubt, with the vast audience of worldwide fans that these women have, this wrestling match would be quite the moneymaker and in today's dollars would earn more than even the Thriller in Manila did with Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazier.

If it was your decision, what would you have them wear? C'mon, be honest. Would you have them wear a one piece bathing suit, as they do in women's wrestling matches? Or would you dress them in something more appropriate? Yeah, sure, most of you would say a bikini or have them run around naked, but wouldn't it be more fun to watch their street clothes stripped from their bodies? Oh, yeah! What if Sandra Bullock wore that gown she wore at the Oscars? How many of you would love to see her wrestling in that? I know I would. Wouldn't you love to see that gown torn to shreds, before being pulled off of her naked, sexy body?

Wouldn't you like to see Jennifer Aniston wrestling in a Parochial school outfit with her hair up in a ponytail, while she snapped her gum. What do you think? I love that idea, especially, if she was wearing white panties underneath her skirt. How much would you pay to see that? Imagine Angelina Jolie tossing and flipping Jennifer Aniston around the ring. Imagine Jennifer on the mat with her legs spread and her skirt collected around her waist. Wow.

Speaking of Angelina Jolie, just like in one of those crazy, Japanese sharking videos, wouldn't you like to watch Jennifer reach down and pull Angelina's dress up and over her head? Once trapped by her own dress, Jennifer pulls down Angelina's panties, lifts up her bra, and gives her a spanking, while giving us all a naked view of Angelina's hot, tattooed body. Yeah, this is one celebrity tag team, sexy, summer bout worth seeing. It would be fun to watch Jennifer give Angelina the beat down she deserves for stealing her man. Wouldn't it be something if Brad Pitt was sitting in the audience watching the show?

For sure, until we ask them, we don't know if these women would agree to wrestle one another. Other than for the money and fame that 5 out of 6 of them don't need or want, why would they agree to wrestle? I'm afraid they wouldn't. Yet, what would you do, if you were them? If you were a celebrity and if your opponent was your nemesis and the woman that you hated, would you fight her in a tag team, sexy, summer bout? It's fun to think about them agreeing to such a match, isn't it?

Maybe, if they hated their opponent enough, maybe if they saw this as their one and only chance to beat the crap out of the woman they so hated, they'd jump at the opportunity to drag her across the ring by her hair naked. Certainly, you'd pay more to see a naked Jennifer Aniston put the hurt to a naked Angelina Jolie, wouldn't you? How much is it worth to you to watch Sandra Bullock and Michelle McGee wrestle, while hoping to see more of Michelle than her tattoos and more of Sandra than her smile?

What if the women all said no, they'd never step in a ring and fight, as if they were common whores? What then? How can these women be persuaded to wrestle? What could they be offered to wrestle one another and to flash the audience and the world their semi-naked or naked bodies?

Just as Janet Jackson received all that press for briefly showing her nipple at a Super Bowl halftime, imagine the sexual spectacle this wrestling match would be if these six women paraded around the wrestling ring in all manners of undress throughout most of the match? Is that something you'd pay to see? Would you buy the video? I know that I would.

Depending on who wins and what happens in the ring, can you imagine the marketing campaign with slogans imprinted tee shirts, hats, coffee mugs, bumper stickers, posters, et al? Imagine the house parties you could have with all your friends gathered around the big screen, while cheering for your favorite celebrity or rooting for the underdog? You'd be talking about and masturbating over that match for years, no doubt. Me, too.

Since most of these women are very rich, money is not the motivating factor. Most of them can afford whatever they want, whenever they want it. Aside from beating the crap out of their perceived counterpart whores, women who have caused them great emotional distress, what else would motivate them to participate? How can a promoter inspire these women to take him up on an offer to fight in a celebrity tag team, sexy, summer bout, where they have a good chance losing, being humiliated, and stripped naked?

Well, leave it to the crazy Japanese to find the answer. Hirohito Nagasaki, no relation to any other Hirohito Nagasaki, a fairly common name in Japan, contemplated just how to get these six women together. A wise man to all his friends and family, a sage luminary in his country, and an oracle of information, he meditated on how to arrange for such a wrestling match. Surely, he could invite them to fight in his country and well afford to offer to pay them an inflated price for fighting. Making the venue a global one, instead of only a United States event, and launching an interactive video game from the celebrity tag team, sexy, summer bout, would surely pump up the revenues to astronomical amounts. He could send word to their agents that he has a proposition that will handsomely reward their charities for their guaranteed participation. Perhaps, the greedy agents would jump at the chance to earn 10% of a huge fortune, enough that they'd never have to work again and enough to persuade their clients to fight.

What if the six women still declined his generous offer? What if, no matter how much money he offered them to fight, they wouldn't voluntarily agree to fight? Left with no alternative, he'd have to do something that those zany Japanese are famous for doing. Born from the bloodline and legend of the famed Kamikaze, Hirohito Nagasaki has succeeded in business by never taking no for an answer. He'd just kidnap them off the street, hold them in custody, and not release them, until they agreed to fight and after they fought. Watching them being taken against their will in itself would be a fun video to watch, wouldn't it?

Hirohito liked the latter idea of kidnapping them over the former idea of paying them. Rich enough to afford anything, a billionaire many times over, Hirohito set his plan in motion. He hired not the famed Ninjas and not the feared Samurais to kidnap the women, instead, he gathered an army of the dreaded Ninja-Samurai warriors.

Those who follow the antics of Japanese animation through video games and such may not have ever heard of the Ninja-Samurai warriors and for good measure. Much like the ex-Delta Force soldiers in the United States, they are a secret organization, a missionary force that not only are outcasts but also disgraced because they are loyal only to money. Throwing aside their sacred traditions, they work for the highest bidder and today the highest bidder was Hirohito Nagasaki. The mission was to kidnap the women and hold them for the celebrity tag team, sexy, summer bout.

Shortly after setting his plan in motion, wanting to guarantee the success of his celebrity tag team, sexy, summer bout, Hirohito decided that kidnapping two more women of such recognizable name and stature would put his celebrity tag team, wrestling match over the top. He added Diane Sawyer and Katie Couric to his diabolical list. Diane Sawyer, an icon in news broadcast television, would add credibility to his bout and guarantee that the older audience would watch her fight, hopefully, just to see her stripped naked. Katie, the little bitch that she is, hates Diane. He'd love to see Diane Sawyer beat the crap out of Katie Couric, before stripping her naked. Only, knowing what a slut that Katie is, having slept her way to the top, she'd probably enjoy being so exposed.

With the airways reporting their sudden mysterious absence, Hirohito realized the panic and the investigation they'd cause by their unexplained disappearance. To buy him some much needed time and to keep the attention of the FBI away from him, before a full scale search for them was organized, Hirohito planned on kidnapping Katie Couric and Diane Sawyer last. Always out and about, both living in New York, they'd be easy to kidnap anyway. All it took for them to get close enough to take them was to grease a hand of an employee where they lived for some inside information, as to when they'd be home.

The dreaded Ninja-Samurai warriors didn't need a key to gain entry and even alarms weren't a deterrent to them. Once they grabbed them, they'd sedate them and stuff them in a laundry basket. They'd take them out the service entrance and load them in a waiting truck. There, along with so many other service vehicles in New York, no one would pay them any attention. A private plane waiting on standby would fly them to Japan.

To kidnap Sandra Bullock, Angelina Jolie, and Jennifer Aniston wasn't very difficult at all either. Unless they were attending a function that was open to the public, their only security was their driver. All they needed to do was to incapacitate him and switch drivers. The driver never had to alight from the limousine, as the valet at the restaurant opened the car door for the celebrity. The targeted women would have no idea, until they seated themselves in the limousine and even then, seated behind a darkened partition, it would be too late. With a stab of a needle, they'd be sedated for transport, too.

Oksana proved more difficult than expected to grab, as she was always with her child. They had to watch and wait to find her alone. Yet, their surveillance paid off and they grabbed her, just as she was leaving a Starbucks and on her way to pick up her daughter at her sister's house.

Michelle McGee, Jesse James' new squeeze, was easy to find. All they had to do was to make an appointment with her for a tattoo. With a bag over her head and a needle in her neck, they took her out the back door. Last was Robyn, Mel Gibson's ex-wife. It took a bit of surveillance to find her alone. She was always with one or more of her seven children, but they managed to take her.

Now, with all the contestants sedated, seated, and belted on a plane headed for Japan, let the Celebrity Tag Team, Sexy, Summer Bout begin. The eight women were transported from the airport to a private clinic, a facility where they could be monitored. Once awakened, they were held in secured rooms away from one another for 24 hours, until they regained their wits about them. All voicing their frustration and anger, they were forced to wear what Hirohito wanted to see them wearing when wrestling.

Sandra Bullock wore a copy of her gold Oscar gown to wear. Jennifer Aniston, of course, wore a Parochial school outfit to don. Angelina Jolie wore a simple, short, black dress. Katie Couric wore a business suit with a skirt short enough to show off her great legs. Diane Sawyer wore her uniform of choice, a blouse and skirt. Oksana, Michelle, and Robyn wore simple button down blouses and skirts. Guaranteed to have a naked match, all the women's clothes were easy to remove, as Hirohito ordered that all their clothing be made with loose stitching, even their underwear was loosely stitched, as all women wore panties and bra beneath their clothes.

"Let the games begin."

With the sedatives worn off and their strength regained, the women were made to dress in their wrestling outfits, before being driven to the arena. Delivering them in darkness, dozens of Ninja-Samurai warriors escorted them to the center ring and stood guard around the ring and the arena to thwart their escape. When the lights came on in the way of a giant sun lighting up an entire apartment, the women saw one another for the first time.

"Sandra Bullock, Jennifer Aniston, Robyn, Gibson, and Diane Sawyer, please stand together on the left side of the ring," read Hirohito's announcer over the loudspeaker, as to what was expected of the women. "Michelle McGee, Angelina Jolie, Oksana Grigorieva, and Katie Couric, please stand together on the other side of the ring."

"What is all this? How dare you take us against our wills," said Diane Sawyer.

"This is the Celebrity Tag Team, Sexy, Summer Bout. You are here to wrestle one another."

"I'm not going to wrestle anyone," said Sandra.

"You will wrestle," said the voice with a Japanese accent and sounding much like the great and mighty wizard in the Wizard of Oz.

"Who the fuck are you?" Katie looked into the light. "Why the fuck did you assholes bring me here?"

She had a mouth worse than any sailor, worse than any newspaper man.

"Fuck you," said Oksana to the phantom voice. "I'll cut your balls off, while you sleep," she said in her Russian accent.

"Chill," said Angelina.

"I'm not going to fight anyone," said Jennifer. "I don't know how to fight."

"Good," said Angelina smiling at Jennifer and giving her a look that showed she was already sizing her up as her opponent.

"How dare you kidnap me," said Diane. "I demand you release me this instant."

"I just want to go home to my family," said Robyn. "I miss my children."

"There's no one home to feed my cat," said Michelle.

"Quiet! All of you be silent and listen." Unprecedented to have silence from eight women, who are normally so outspoken, the women silently stood in the ring to hear their instruction. "If even one of you fails to wrestle, my men are instructed to kill you all."

When the Ninja-Samurai pulled their swords, the women screamed.

"I'll fight," said Sandra staring over at Michelle. "So long as I'm fighting that slut," she said pointing to Michelle."

"Who you calling a slut, you frigid, old bitch," said Michelle to Sandra. "Jesse told me that you don't even swallow. How do you expect to keep a man, if you don't know how to properly suck his cock?"

"I bet you've an expert at cock sucking," said Sandra to Michele. "Do you have special tattoo for that, a cock in a mouth?"

"I suppose you want me to fight Katie," said Diane. "It will be my pleasure," she said with a smile.

"Bring it, you old hag," said Katie.

"I'll fight," said Robyn. "I'm been dying to get my hands on that Russian whore."

"Who you calling Russian? I'm from the Ukraine."

"It's telling how she took offense to being named from the wrong country and not for being called a whore," said Diane with a smug laugh.

"Go fuck your mother," said Oksana to Diane.

"And you would, no doubt, fuck her mother," said Robyn to Oksana. "Obvious by how nastily you treat men, you probably prefer women to men."

"Fuck you, too," said Oksana. "I'd never lick your dirty pussy."