Big Bang Theory - Happy New Year

Big Bang Theory-Happy New Year

shaggy77

(fictional story about fictional characters)

It was an early night for Penny as she fished in her purse for her keys. She was supposed to be on a date, but had abruptly cancelled because as soon as she had gotten into her date's car, his hand had found her knee and was sliding up her thigh under her short skirt. "That's it," she exclaimed and jumped out of the car. She didn't just mean she was done with this particular guy; rather she was done with his type. Every guy she went out with seemed to be interested in only one thing; she wondered if any of them even knew the color of her eyes. Just as she was fitting the key into her apartment door, she heard the familiar sound of her two neighbors coming up the stairs.

Turning to greet them, she caught the eye of Leonard Hofstadter and saw his face light up like an LED bulb when he spied her. He immediately grinned and asked her: " hi Penny, you're home early. If you're not doing anything would you like to join us...it's Italian food night. We're late because we went to the comic book store...new Spiderman release." His roommate, "head nerd" Sheldon Cooper just nodded his head and unlocked 4A.

Pausing for just a second, Penny answered: "you know what...I would love to. Let me change and I'll be right over." Leonard's smile got even wider as he ducked into the apartment. Penny and Leonard had dated on a couple different occasions, but each time she had broken it off because she sensed he was becoming too serious. It suddenly occurred to her that after all the jerks she had gone out with since Leonard; a real relationship with a man who sincerely cared for her was just what she craved. No matter how many times she had shot him down, he had always been there for her when she was in need. "Why do I keep pushing him away," she asked herself, "so what if he's a nerd...he's the sweetest guy I've ever met...and an excellent lover."

Quickly changing into a pair of her favorite lounger pants and a tank top she popped over into 4A and was surprised that Sheldon didn't even scold her for not knocking. As if reading her mind, he glanced her way and commented: "I was expecting you." Leonard had already split his order of ziti and green salad into two plates and handed her one.

"Look...even Italian bread," he grinned as he pointed to a slice on the side of her plate. It occurred to her that he had a way of making the simplest things seem somehow special and it warmed her heart.

And then there was Sheldon, as he griped: "Italian bread is just bread with a little brown sugar added and some beaten egg spread on the surface to make the crust harder when it's baked. They act like it's something special that you should pay extra for."

"Don't mind the Grinch," Leonard told her, "he's just getting in practice for his big season." The calendar had just turned December and there were so many things about Christmas that irked Sheldon. The three of them ate and conversed in such a nice, relaxed atmosphere that Penny felt completely at home and at ease. Leonard hinted about her relationship status and she just casually replied that she was currently unattached. He tried to hide it, but she knew she saw a trace of a smile when he heard that; and she smiled also.

The evening had been so pleasant that Leonard threw caution to the wind and boldly asked her, "I was thinking about having a tree decorating party next week and was wondering if you would like to come...nothing extravagant, just the gang decorating our tree. Maybe everyone could bring an ornament to make the tree their own."

"I would love to," she immediately replied. "And you're OK with this," she asked Sheldon, knowing he was never OK with anything.

"You mean bringing a spider infested fire-trap into the apartment...sure, just peachy," he answered.

"Sheldon...you did it," she shouted so loud if frightened him.

"What," he inquired.

"You finally mastered sarcasm," she told him.

"I did, didn't I," he agreed; a big grin on his face.

When it was time to leave, Penny kissed a startled Leonard on the cheek and said: "thank you for tonight, sweetie...it was just what I needed." As she turned away toward the door she added: "quick...what color are my eyes."

Without even thinking, he replied: "green...like sparkling emeralds. What was that about?"

Grinning from ear to ear, she walked away saying: "oh nothin'...sweet dreams."

The following Saturday Sheldon and Leonard's small apartment was bustling with activity. Several pizza boxes were arranged on the kitchen counter and all their friends were busy decorating the evergreen. Howard had decorated it with a miniature rocket (of course) and Bernadette had painted a Zangen pill bottle with festive red and green stripes. Sheldon had added his usual tiny bust of Einstein, and Amy hung a small replica of the brain. Raj hung up a round ball painted to resemble Earth, to reflect on his recent job at the Planetarium and his girlfriend Emily brought a small doll ornament that looked like Sally from Nightmare Before Christmas.

Stuart slipped a Superman keychain from his comic book store on a branch and Leonard hung a tiny light-sabre. Penny had a sparkly replica of a red high heel pump to symbolize her well known affinity for shoes. When she went to hang it, Sheldon just had to comment: "I notice there is only one shoe...is that symbolic because you can't remember where you took them off and lost the other?" Then he snorted that poor excuse of his for a laugh.

This annoyed Leonard and he scolded his roommate: "now Sheldon...play nice...that was uncalled for."

"Yeah Sheldon," Penny added, "if you want to bend over I'll demonstrate where that missing shoe might be located." Everyone laughed and continued with the fun. When the decorating was over and the pizza gone, they just sat around the tree "oooing" and "ahhing" at how beautiful it was.

Bernadette brought up a suggestion: "Howie and I have been talking and we were wondering if you guys would be interested in having a New Years party. This apartment would be perfect and we could move the sofa and chairs to the side to make a dance floor...you know, old fashioned waltzes and stuff too. We thought it would be fun to get all dressed up like we were going to a fancy ballroom."

Before Sheldon could object; like he knew he would; Leonard spoke up: "that sounds like fun. Penny is probably busy, but I think the rest of us would be here."

Knowing he assumed she had a date for New Year's Eve, Penny immediately chimed in: "no...no plans...I would love that. It sound like so much fun. We could move my couch over here for more seating."

Shocked that she wasn't previously engaged, Leonard smiled widely and suggested: "we can invite Wil Wheaton and how about Bert...I know he's been feeling down since his gold-digger girlfriend dumped him."

"It seems I get no say in the matter, even though it IS my apartment," Sheldon finally got a word in the conversation.

"Come on Sheldon," Amy told him, "it really sounds like fun."

"Well l guess it might be entertaining to see Bert all dressed up...kind of like one of the characters in Country Bear Jamboree," Sheldon chuckled.

"Great...we've got almost three weeks to get this all planned," Bernadette chirped.

When everyone was leaving, Leonard pulled Penny aside and handed her an envelope and a small box that looked suspiciously like a necklace box. "It sounds like everyone is going to be busy between now and Christmas and I know you're going home to Nebraska for a couple days, so I wanted to give you your Christmas gift." When they had been going out, she had mentioned that she hadn't been back home in a couple years so Leonard had given her an airline ticket for her birthday so she could visit at Christmas.

"Yeah and thanks again...you are so sweet," she quietly said.

"Stop, you've already thanked me a hundred times," he blushed, "now open your gifts please." Opening the envelope, she saw that it was a gift certificate to Gus's Garage and just looked at him blankly.

"You know the garage around the corner; they sure know you and your car; well I was talking to Juan the mechanic; who by the way is actually part owner...there is no Gus. We became pretty good friends...it turns out he loves comic books. Anyway, this certificate is for a free tune-up. I thought maybe I could take your car in while you're in Nebraska and it would be ready when you got back." What she didn't know was that Leonard had told Juan to replace everything that needed it: from taillights to tires...no limit on the expense. It wouldn't be a new car but it would be the next best thing.

She put her arms around him, hugged tightly for several Mississippi's and whispered in his ear: "you are the sweetest man on earth." Fumbling with the wrapping paper, she tore open the box and opened it to find a small heart-shaped gold necklace.

Looking embarrassed, Leonard mumbled: "I know it might not be appropriate; and you don't ever have to wear it; but like it or not, you stole my heart."

Knowing that she had to leave quickly before she broke down in tears, Penny kissed him on the cheek and added: "thank you so much, you dear sweet man."

When she reached her apartment, she collapsed on the sofa and sobbed for fifteen minutes. Recovering, she remembered to call home and confirm she would be home for Christmas. When the connection was made and her father answered, Penny told him: "hi Daddy...just wanted to let you know what time my flight would be in to Omaha. One more thing...I think I'm in love...the real thing."

"That's great, Slugger," Wyatt replied, "as long as he makes you happy that's good enough for me."

"Talk to you more when I see you," she finished up, "nite."

That night she had a dream about her first Christmas in California. Achieving her dream of Hollywood stardom had been more expensive, and taken longer, than she anticipated. She had to shell out two months of rent in advance in addition to a month's security deposit. Coupled with all the other monthly and daily expenses, she had quickly depleted her small savings nest egg from Nebraska. Since she was new to the Cheesecake Factory, they were only giving her between fifteen and twenty hours a week until she proved her dependability and competence. One December day an opportunity to make some fast, and a relatively large amount of, cash fell into her lap.

Every Wednesday night a group of five men would patronize the restaurant and usually sat at one of her tables. She didn't think it was intentional, just a coincidence until they presented her with a proposal. They were friendly enough and had guessed she was an aspiring actress; which was very common in California. She had admitted that breaking into the business was more difficult than she had anticipated and when they asked if she was looking to increase her income, Penny had reluctantly admitted she was almost desperate. They asked her to come back to the table and talk on her break, and she agreed.

The group seemed harmless enough. They were always joking good-naturedly among themselves and always friendly...good tippers, too. Penny had even gotten to know their names. The most visible was a tall, bald black man who they called Charles. He must have been six foot six and actually did remind her of Charles Barkley. Harvey, the one who had invited her to talk, was about six feet tall and of average build with wavy black hair. The other black man of the group was named Duval and reminded Penny of Morgan Freeman. Patrick was shorter and heavier than the rest and kept his hair in a ponytail. The fifth member of the group, Johnny, was kind of a slick talker and was about six foot two and of solid build. She guessed they were all in their late thirties.

On her break, Penny sat at their table and Harvey outlined the proposal: "here's the thing Penny: we've all been friends since high school and all remained in the area. We are all successful business men and each Christmas season we throw ourselves a little private party...you know so we can reminisce and catch up...just to relax. It's just the five of us; no wives; and we usually hire someone to entertain us. This entails dancing and stripping and entertaining. Don't worry though, no one will ask to have intercourse with you...the wives have made that clear to us." Listening intently, as soon as Harvey said the word intercourse, Penny nearly giggled because all she could think of was Sheldon's constant and annoying use of the word coitus.

"We employed another aspiring actress the last two years but she moved back East," Harvey continued. He then wrote a dollar amount on a napkin and showed it to Penny. "This would be in cash," he clarified, "no record of any income." When Penny saw the figure he had written, she felt faint: it was more than she had made in the previous six months. "Why don't you think about it and let us know when you bring the check."

Thinking about the opportunity, Penny rationalized that, although she never considered herself a stripper, she was a good dancer and had given several private strip shows to previous boyfriends. If she entertained these men for one night she would be able to keep her head above water for another six months, and she would certainly have a significant acting job by then. The best part was they assured her they were not looking to have sex with her. Making up her mind, she delivered their check and agreed to perform at their holiday party. The five friends were all smiles as Harvey handed her a business card from a computer software company and instructed her to call him for directions to his house.

The evening before the Christmas party; Harvey confided in her that they absolutely refused to be politically correct and call it a "holiday" party; Penny had called for directions and was taking a long soak in a hot scented bubble bath. She carefully shaved her underarms and legs and trimmed the thin blond "landing strip" that was her choice of grooming at the time. Laying in the steaming tub, she thought of the fact that they had never actually described what "entertaining" them entailed, besides the stripping. "I'm a big girl, I can handle it," she assured herself as she breathed in the vanilla/jasmine scent of the steam. She just wanted to make sure she performed satisfactorily because she really needed the money.

After drying off and admiring her figure in the full-length mirror, she laid out her outfit for the next day. Initially she was going to wear one of her tight, little-black-dresses but decided that it would be too awkward when it came to gracefully stripping it off; so she selected the classic school-girl outfit. She had several white blouses and just happened to have a tartan-print short skirt left over from the previous year's Halloween costume. Her skimpiest, see through black lace bra and thong would compliment the outfit, along with five-inch black stiletto heels. She knew the heels made her long shapely legs even more incredible.

From Harvey's directions, she easily found his home in an affluent suburb of Pasadena. The outside of the house was impressive without being ostentatious and he answered the door immediately. He showed her into the living room/ dining room area of the open floor plan and the other five friends were there joking with each other and knocking back drinks. Johnny and Patrick had been playing some video game on a huge wall-sized TV and they quickly put the controllers down when she entered the room. Duval made a point of complimenting her outfit: "very nice...every man's fantasy and you certainly have the legs to pull it off."

Harvey guided her to an over-stuffed sofa and asked her what her favorite drink was. Thinking for a minute, she answered that it was probably margaritas and he replied that she was in luck because he had just made a pitcher. They just sat and talked for a few minutes; getting to know each other better. Penny helped herself to the snack table, and before she knew it, half the pitcher of margaritas was gone. They made her feel so welcome and relaxed (of course the alcohol helped) that she nearly forgot she was there to entertain, until Harvey put on some bass-heavy dance music. They all clapped when she got up and began to dance.

The alcohol was soon coursing through her veins and her dancing became more risque and suggestive. The carpet in the living room area was snagging her heels so she shifted a few feet into the dining area and started to sway and undulate her wide hips to the beat of the music. She made sure to flip up her skirt occasionally so they got a flash of her round cheeks. Stopping between dances for a glass of the tequila concoction, Penny became more and more uninhibited with each number she performed. By the fourth song, she began to unbutton her blouse from the top down and when she reached the last button, she flashed it open and closed several times to display her lacy bra.

With a flourish, she let the sleeves drift down her toned arms until it slid completely off and she caught it in her right hand. Twirling it over her head like a cowboy's lasso, the men watched her barely encumbered breasts wobble inside her flimsy bra. When she let go of the blouse, it flew across the room and landed in one of the dining room chairs that had been pushed back against the wall. Clapping and whistles encouraged her to reach behind her and slowly unzip the short skirt. With the zipper all the way down, Penny released it and let it pool at her heels. She had been correct about the five inch heels accentuating her magnificent legs...they seemed five feet long as she thrust her hips from side to side.

More whistles and whoops as Penny's incredible body twisted and twirled wearing only the briefest of underwear. When the song ended, she was perspiring and Charles suggested it was a good time for a break, and to open her Christmas gifts. "Gifts...what gifts," she panted while settling on the sofa and accepting another drink. They weren't forcing alcohol on her, she was just thirsty and Harvey did make an excellent margarita.

"It's a Christmas party," Charles reminded her, "you have to get presents." Her eyes lit up as each of the five men lay a wrapped gift at her feet. They were all smiling from ear to ear as Charles handed her his present to open first. "I hope you like it," he told her, "it's something that will spice up the evening and you can use at home." Penny quickly tore off the shiny paper. In the small box was a tube-shaped bottle of "stimulating lube." Maybe it was just her rapidly arousing mental state, but she thought it looked like a miniature dildo.

As she placed it on the floor, Harvey stepped forward to urge her to open his gift next: "I think we all got you gifts that you could use tonight, and have just as much fun with them when you get home." The wrapping paper was shiny silver as it reflected the light and she ripped it off to find a purple gel dildo, approximately ten inches long inside the box. Surprisingly, the first thought that crossed her mind was that now she was getting an inkling of what they had meant by "entertain them."

Tearing the third present open she discovered four long nylon straps. On one end of each of the straps there was a wide cuff that closed with Velcro and the other end also had Velcro attached. "Kinky...right," Duval grinned, indicating they were his selections.

Patrick seemed embarrassed when he handed her his gift, and she soon found out why. The box was larger than the first three and contained the largest dildo she had ever seen; about the thickness of a water bottle, but longer than her forearm. "It was actually molded from a horse," Patrick informed her, "it's eighteen inches long." As she held it up to inspect it, she thought she saw Patrick blush.

The slick-talker, Johnny, who reminded Penny of one of those spokesmen who hawk products on late night TV, presented her with the largest box of all. He was all twitchy as she tore off the paper and looked inside. Penny's jaw just dropped when she saw the contents. It was another dildo, but it made the horse-sized shaft seem tiny. "It's molded from an elephant dick," Johnny exclaimed, "of course this one is only twenty-seven inches long and an elephant penis is about four feet. Isn't it incredible...a place in Texas sells them. Penny lifted it up for all in the room to see and thought that it was about the same girth of one of her vodka bottles. It was huge, black and all gnarly; but it fascinated her.