Mid-April 2013 was like most other mid-Aprils. I was finishing another year as production assistant on "The Big Bang Theory" -- only this time, the last day of shooting fell on my birthday. So it was a bitter sweet day all around as the cast and crew left for summer break -- only this time, two of them stuck around with me.
Having worked on the show for four seasons, I was no stranger to social occasions with Kaley Cuoco, a.k.a. Penny. I could also say the same about Melissa Rauch, a.k.a. Bernadette, who started her time on the show just after I did. Kaley had helped fit me to fit in and Melissa was a fellow newcomer, so I owed both of them quite a bit.
I didn't expect them to pile on by offering to take me out for my birthday -- just the three of us. But I took it, knowing it was the last time I'd see them for three months. With that, I figured we'd go all out, yet they dressed modestly -- as if these two blond bombshells could be that modest -- and made sure we only had a few drinks at the nearest bar.
Kaley took us to her apartment, since she was indeed clear enough to drive. Yet I briefly wondered how clear she was when she asked me to come in with Melissa. Nevertheless, I followed the ladies and the next thing I knew, another hour of casual chatter had gone by.
"So, four years working with us. Wow," Kaley chattered. "How many times have you thought about fucking us?" That brought an end to the casual stuff right there.
"What? Come on...." I tried to laugh off. "Melissa, are you sure we didn't go overboard at the bar?" I asked, letting her know I wasn't indulging in this. Yet she didn't look offended or put out at all.
"No, we're good. It's a clear question. Maybe it should have a clear answer," Melissa said. She didn't sound drunk, and now that she wasn't using her squeaky Bernadette voice, it sounded pretty serious.
"Wait a minute....you really wanna gang me up like this here, on my birthday? On our last day of work?" I nitpicked.
"Why not?" Kaley commented, which made me frown in indignation.
"Come on, you guys are better than that! Okay, so I might have thought like a pervert a few times, but you two can't tell me that's shocking. I mean, look at you! Okay, that's no excuse, but I always acted like a professional near you! That counts for something!" I defended myself. And all I got for it was laughter.
"I think you got the wrong idea about our idea of ganging you up," Melissa corrected.
"Well, if you're not ganging me up for thinking.....things about you, what else...." I trailed off as I started to really think it over.
"Like I said, why not?" Kaley repeated. "It's your birthday, we're all single now, we've all thought about it once or twice over the years, and we won't see each other again for months. By then we'll be able to work together again like nothing ever happened."
"You've all thought...." I scrambled to catch up. "Wait, which one of you is offering....what?"
"Okay. I guess without a script, we can't explain things the right way," Kaley figured. "Not with words."
I'd gotten about halfway there anyway -- it was the outlandish conclusions that were tripping me up. Before I could explain, Kaley used her lips to explain another way.
Any odd thoughts I had about kissing Kaley Cuoco certainly didn't look like this. Not after what she hinted at, and not with an audience -- not every time anyway. But this was still one of the most gorgeous women on TV, and one who teased my brain for years -- supposedly by accident -- so I let myself indulge before I had to come back to my senses.
But as I adjusted to her lips against mine, I felt another pair of lips on my ear.
Before I could turn, Kaley took my face in her hands and deepened her kiss, which temporarily left me blind to the world. Until I felt those other lips suckle my ear and then go down to my neck.
When Kaley broke off, I didn't know who to address or be thankful towards first. Melissa acted faster by taking my face and kissing my free lips next. As if Kaley kissing me wasn't enough without a second gorgeous, busty blonde following up. To add to the overkill, now I felt Kaley's lips on my neck at the same time.
Melissa added her tongue and wore me down, as I could only move my lips and tongue to meet hers while Kaley suckled on my collar bone. When Melissa broke from my mouth, she went back to my cheek and I felt Kaley do the same. My eyes furiously shot back and forth between them as they went down each side of my neck.
Eventually, I focused on Kaley as she pulled away, her enticing green eyes twinkling with a naughty, perhaps semi-drunk glare. I briefly looked below, imagining the supple breasts, lovely shape and immaculate ass hidden underneath her grey top and blue skirt. After seeing hints of them all for years on sets and TV, now I might get to see them all?
I heard a cough and turned to Melissa, who somehow made me push Kaley aside with a heart stopping look. Without her Bernadette glasses, her striking blue eyes were clear and burning into me. To say nothing of what was straining at the top of her pink shirt. While she didn't have to show her body on the show as much as Kaley -- a crying, puzzling shame, really -- everyone knew how much her chest was packing....and I might soon have proof up close.
"You sure?" I satisfied my last remaining bit of hesitation.
"Like she said, tonight's the perfect night to do this. It'll help make the summer go by better," Melissa stated. "But there's gonna be an order to this."
"Yeah, we have a perfect system ready to go," Kaley chimed in. "So you go into the bedroom, let us go over it one more time, and one of us will be right there."
That just raised more questions....but the more time I spent asking them, the longer this thing would be delayed. So I got smart enough to keep quiet and go right up to Kaley's bedroom. After getting myself comfortable on her bed, and debating whether or not to start taking my clothes off now, I stayed fully clothed as my wait reached five minutes.
