Do not read if under 18.
Characters from this episode, from the show Community, not created by me.
Fictional events, etc.
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These are the adventures of T.V Agent Fungi Mormos--a man with endless charisma, a chin carved by the Ancient Greeks and enough stamina to compete in the Olympics-- as he travles across T.V shows past and present to fix characters between commercials... through fucking.
Join us on this episode, as Agent Normos travels to Greendale Community College, where he has the hope to run out of steam.
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Around a large business table, a bunch of men in suits sat arranging papers in folders and clips on papers. On the head of the table, Mr. Bossman, known for his bossing abilities, sharpened a number two B pencil, waited for the meeting to start. Ten seconds later, an alarm clock beeped once.
"Shall we begin?"
"Yes, Mr. Bossman" replied the room.
"Perfect. Well, then. Thanks to Agent Normos, the once highly low... Highly low... Is that right?"
"Of course, Mr. Bossman."
"Right. The once highly low ratings of T.V Land have gone way up. The characters are fresher, peppier, livelier--" Mr Bossman had a new synonym dictionary "and it's all thanks to that wonderful hunk of a man, good ol' Fungi."
"A-men"
"Of course. Things aren't yet a hundred percent stabilized now, are they? Nope. Not one itty-bitty. Do you know the chaos that goes on behind cameras, between commercials? Lois Lane has body-image issues, Mary Tyler Moore takes amphetamines and hell! Even Felicity is facing existential dread."
"That's actually good for the ratings"
"Yes, Nameless Character, but that's beside the point. We must send Fungi Normos... To college." Here, Mr. Bossman pressed a button on his intercom. "Mrs. Sistent. Please send in Fungi Normos."
"Right away, sir"
The doors opened, and a broad-shouldered-chiseled-chinned-beaming-faced-blue-eyed man stepped in.
"What can I do you for, gentlemen?" asked Agent Normos.
"God, he's so hot." whispered Nameless Character.
"Ask not what you can do us for, but who you can do for people. Or is it whom?" answered Mr. Bossman "Mr. Normos, are you familiar with the Greendale Community College?"
"Of course, sir. They have a wonderful course on stairs."
"Yes, Fungi. But what I want you to do, is I want you to travel back to 2010, get to NBC, get inside the show, and fuck the ever living shit out of a couple of characters, then come back for your next assignment. Got that?"
"Yes, sir. I'm on it."
"Oh you'll be on it. You'll be on a lot of its. Am I right, Board of Extras?"
"Yes, Mr. Bossman."
"Who's the funniest Bossman on the planet?"
"You, Mr. Bossman."
"That's right. Now, Normos, what the fuck are you still doing here? Waiting for tea time? Tea time was 15 minutes ago! Get the fuck out of my sight!"
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"Wow, it really is easy to raise money when you sell out your gender" said Britta Perry, the absolute worst, to Psycho Annie, after pretending to be a clueless blonde bimbo to earn a couple of bucks.
"I'm sure it's even easier, when you're not standing next do this: 'Hey, jerk, you're stupid. Give me money, I know more than you'" replied sexy Annie Edison.
"It really is difficult not to sexualize her" thought Agent Normos as he watched one of his favorite episodes from a corner.
Both were wearing "uniforms" for their cause, and boy did they accentuate the curves.
"My sweaters keep shrinking!" said Britta.
"I get up an hour early to ever so slightly curl my hair!" retorted Annie.