Raj, Amy, and Bernadette were all gathered in Penny's apartment.
"Thanks again for letting me crash girls' night," Raj said.
Penny replied "Are you kidding? You brought fancy wine and made fondue. I've fucked guys for less." They all looked at her. "It's a joke." She looked down into her glass of wine. "Based on real events."
Raj broke the award silence. "Anyway, I was hoping I could, uh, pick your brains a little. I'm supposed to take Lucy out Friday and I need a killer first date."
Amy spoke up. "Well, evolutionary biology says that women are attracted to a man who is steady in the face of danger, so I recommend an unsafe environment. Seedy bar on the wrong side of the tracks, picnic near a lunatic asylum, a wine tasting on Skid Row."
Raj stared at her for a moment and considered what an odd suggestion that was. "Uh, Lucy has some, uh, social anxiety issues. Maybe we could start with something simpler."
"Why don't you take her to Mouseland? You go on Space Hill, you're in the dark, she's holding onto you," Bernadette said dreamily.
"Yeah, but you just have to remember, that ride is shorter than you think and they take a picture of you at the end, so make sure you got your clothes back on and his cock isn't in your mouth. They frown on that," Penny reminded them. Then she realized what she had just said. "It's a joke." She looked into her glass again, hoping it would retract what she had just said. "Based on real events." She took a gulp of her wine.
Raj thought about it. "Hmmmm, Mouseland? I don't know. With all the crowds and the weird characters walking around, just reminds me too much of India."
"I haven't been to Mouseland since I was a kid. We should definitely go one weekend," Amy said.
Bernadette shook her head. "Weekends are too crowded."
Penny shrugged her shoulders. "So, blow off work, go on a weekday."
Amy shook her head. "Hooky? I've never played hooky in my life. My mom said that's how girls end up addicted to reefer and jazz music."
"It's more like how a girl ends up at a Best Western hotel in the middle of a gangbang with half the football team," Penny said with a hint of remorse in her voice.
"Joke?" Bernadette asked.
Penny took a sip of her wine. "I can laugh about it now."
Bernadette looked at the others in the room. "So, what do you say? This Friday we ditch work and go to Mouseland?"
Penny hoisted her glass of wine. "I'm in."
Amy shook her head. "Nope, can't do it. I don't like Best Westerns."
Raj was becoming agitated. "Excuse me, I thought we were trying to solve my problem?"
The question startled Penny back into the moment. "Oh, yeah, right. Wait, what was your problem again?"
Raj was clearly agitated now. "I am a man who can't talk to women, trying to figure out how to go on a romantic date with a girl who suffers from such crippling social anxiety she can't be around other people."
Penny took another sip of wine. "Yeah, that's a toughie."
Bernadette scratched her chin for a moment. "Hmmmm, let's think." Raj anxiously awaited a brilliant answer. "We doing just Mouseland or California Experience, too?"
****
Penny and Bernadette were tooling down the highway Bernadette's car on their way to Mouseland.
"I can't believe I ditched work for Mouseland," Bernadette said with excitement in her voice.
"What did you tell your boss?" Penny asked.
"Oh, I was very clever, I did it in stages," Bernadette said. "At seven o'clock last night, I called about a problem at the office and casually mentioned I was going out for seafood. At nine thirty, I called and told him that one of my scallops tasted weird. At eleven thirty, I called and said I was throwing up like a fire hose. At twelve forty-five, I called and made nothing but dry heaving sounds, and now I'm going to Disneyland." She paused. "What did you say?"
Penny shrugged her shoulders. "I work at the Cheesecake Factory, I said bye. So, what are we gonna do first?"
*****
The two women walked through the gates into the happiest place on earth. Penny wore her short-short-short jeans shorts and a skin tight, low cut pink tank top with thin straps over the shoulders, and Converse tennis shoes. Bernadette wore a light, breezy sun dress covered in flowers with spaghetti straps. The front had a deep "v" cut into it laced together with colorful strings. The back dove from her shoulders to just above her ass in the same "v" shape laced with across her back with the same colorful strings, and wedges on her feet.
They rode The Flying Elephant and the Space Hill. Then they came upon The Mouse's House.
"Oh! We have to see The Mouse!" Bernadette squealed. She grabbed Penny's hand and pulled her into the house.
Being a weekday, the line to meet The Mouse was short. When it came to their turn, Bernadette ran to The Mouse and gave him a big hug. He ran his big, puffy hands up and down her nearly bare back.
Penny wasn't nearly as excited to embrace the big rat, but she did it anyway. He pulled her close. Just as he had done with Bernadette, he ran his cloth covered hands up and down her back.
Did he just grab my ass?!
She went to break the embrace, but he pulled her closer, continuing to slowly run his hands up and down her back.
Penny finally broke away. The two girls spun around and stood next to him to pose for their picture. The Mouse reached around their waists and pulled them close.
Bernadette's tit nearly bounced out of her top.
Did he just feel me up?!
Just as the camera flash went off, Penny felt it again.
Did that fucker just grab my ass again?!