It was, sadly, a scene that had played out over and over again for them. Mark found himself on top of Gina in their customary Missionary position and was pumping himself in and out of her. Fairly mechanical. Gina was doing her best to verbally encourage him, but it was clearly for show. Their lovemaking technique had, over time, devolved into the sole purpose of Mark getting his rocks off every few days, and sadly for Gina, the idea of her climaxing with him was non-existent. A couple of minutes later, Mark released himself into her, another conjugal event ending with his orgasm but not hers.
Mark knew that, once again, he had disappointed his wife, and she could sense it. "Really, that was great, Honey! I don't have to cum to be satisfied." Gina held a handful of tissues to her groin as she exited the bed and made her way to the toilet, happy that Mark had cum inside of her, happy that he had gotten his release, but clearly unsatisfied herself. Their marriage was a good one, but their sex life was mediocre at best -- not even close to good, let alone great. Mark was a terrific husband in so many other ways! He was steadfastly faithful to her, kind, funny, a good provider for their family, and he always put her first. Lots of great characteristics! But Mark was far from the best lover that she had ever had. They at least attempted to connect their bodies together occasionally, even if he fell way short every time. Over the years, he had kind of given up trying to bring her to orgasm, confident that he would never be as good as others had been before him. Gina had a powerful vibrator in her drawer that she had privately nicknamed 'Carlos' -- always ready to give her what she needed when the repeated lack of orgasmic relief from Mark finally got to be too much for her. But overall, she was very happy with her life and very happy that she was married to Mark! He was great in so many ways, even if the sex wasn't.
Mark watched as his wife's naked body left their bed, his balls relieved but his mind struggling once again. He knew that she loved him, knew that she was faithful to him and that he probably was a great husband for her overall. But he also knew that he fell way short of her sexual expectations and could see the disappointment in her eyes from his lack of satisfying her. Mark wanted to be the best that Gina had ever had in every aspect of their relationship, and he knew that he just wasn't. Every time that he disappointed her in any way, he feared that she was silently comparing him to the guys from her past who hadn't. And especially when he failed her sexually, which was always, his mind flooded with images of her being ravished by her last boyfriend -- a guy from Europe that she had dated for a couple of years before him. Images of her exploding in orgasmic pleasure from the other guy's skills. Images of her giving enthusiastically to him with a lustful desire that had been absent from their bed since nearly the beginning. Images of her past lover taking her to places that he just couldn't, and a fear that deep down there was a part of her that still desired the other guy and what he did for her. No matter how hard he tried to stop them, those images assaulted his mind, refusing to leave him. And on those occasions late at night when she thought he was asleep as she masturbated quietly next to him, he just knew who her mind was thinking about. Once he even heard her whisper 'Carlos' just prior to climaxing, and his suspicions of her disappointment with him and with who she had left behind were confirmed. It was a vicious cycle that he was in, and he lived under a constant sense of inadequacy.
As he lay silently in the darkness, staring at the ceiling while once again listening to 'Carlos' taking his wife to places that he hadn't been able to, Mark's mind drifted back to where it all began.
+++
Mark had been a world-class gymnast in his younger days. Gina had been a certified gymnastics judge on the international stage. She was a few years older than he was, but that mattered much less once he was no longer in his teen years. Gina had quite a bit more life experience under her belt than he did when they got together of course, but she was ready to settle down with a good man, and 'good' certainly described Mark.
There was one moment in his competitive career that would forever stand out for him. It was the World Championship of Gymnastics, and he was having a great night!
Six events. Just six. Each event would award medals for excellence to the top three performers. The one gymnast who did the best overall, however, would be named the coveted World Champion. This didn't mean winning every event, just that the Champion had done better than the others across the entire meet. Gold medals in three events, maybe a couple of Silvers, and at least a close Bronze in the other was usually enough to win, but that particular night was dominated by the world's best, and the race for World Champion was going to be a battle. Mark was clearly the best on the floor exercise and the pommel horse, and he had performed brilliantly in those events, taking the Gold in each. But the two bar events and especially the rings had always given him a little trouble, and that night he was facing the reigning European and World Champion whose specialty was in those events. It was going to come down to the perceptions of the judges, and until that final score was posted, the World Champion's identity would remain a mystery.
Mark's last event was the vault -- his best. On his third and final attempt, he had soared to a height rarely seen, executed twists and turns as his body flipped about, and then stuck that all-important landing. A personal best! When the final event scores posted, his name was at the top -- a third Gold medal. But the reigning World Champion from Spain still had yet to perform in his best event -- the rings -- and he was within striking distance of winning once again. All Mark could do was sit and wait and hope that he was enough.
