How can I be mad at him and love him so deeply at the same time? One minute, I'm arguing with him and walking out of the door, and the next minute, I'm in his arms, kissing his sinfully sweet lips. I don't get it! I've had too much of him to want anyone else...that's what it comes down to.
I was driving around town, red hot with anger, just having had another famous argument with him. Twice while driving I have stopped and tried to go back to that house, but I have resisted well. But how long will that last? I have a feeling that I will eventually return. I stop at a red light, running my hand through my hair and briefly looking around. I spot a couple that almost looks like him and I, and memories rush back to my mind. God, he was so sweet. Many a time I have personally claimed that I can't get enough of him. I miss him...I need his touch again...no, wait, I'm at him...right? Bah, what am I going to do? Just as I ponder a moment, the sound of honking horns from cars behind me remind me that the red light has since turned green and I need to proceed. I drive on, but only for a little while longer before I realize that I need to go back. Go back to him again.
I shortly arrive in front of the house. I get out of the car and slowly walk towards the door, hesitant. I look back at the car, wondering how it took one second to convince me back here again. I then look at the door, and continue to walk. Maybe he's not here...maybe he took a walk around or something. I opened the door, my heart racing, and I find him standing there. Leaned up against the counter, his deep amber eyes stared into mine. And I froze. Part of me wanted to jump into his arms; the other part wanted to back away and close the door. Unfortunately, I wasn't doing either, and that gave him clearance to walk closer to me. I trembled, knowing and wanting exactly just what he was about to do. His body was right against mine, our eyes still locked in one another's. He went up to touch my face and I finally turn my head away. Why did I do that? Isn't that what I wanted? No...I don't want that!
I turn my body away from him and start to walk out again, only I can hear his footsteps behind me. I can feel his footsteps behind me. They were quicker than mine, and I could tell because I could instantly feel his arms wrapped around my body, promptly turning me to face him once more and not letting me go. Looking down, I wanted to cry. I wanted to pound away at his chest and scream. He kissed my forehead and tears fell. Taking in a few deep breaths, I could fall apart at the scent of fresh clothes and sweet cologne. I was dizzy, but not in a physical sense. I could feel his warm breaths at my ear, and it took me back to those hot nights experienced in that big bed...
"I'm sorry, Sweetie-pie." He said. The first time he'd spoken since the argument, and he called me by his affectionate name for me. And I just loved hearing it. I loved hearing his deep voice almost call out to me. It soothed my soul. Sometimes it aroused me. But I was supposed to be mad. How is that possible with all this goodness around me?