"Christ on a bicycle! You did, didn't you?"
"Who me?" Donna smiled wickedly at me having turned up for work in the same clothes as the previous day, "He was hot. She wasn't really into it, but they're here on holiday and I enjoyed myself immensely!"
"Seeing them again tonight?"
"Fuck no! You know me, never go there twice! Bad sex is often not improved on and why waste the memory of amazing sex?"
"Donna, Caz, hurry up would you- the boss is in a shit of a mood again." Anton one of the sub-editors of the online news service we worked for ushered us towards the boardroom.
Donna was our arts, entertainment and fashion guru and had the most amazing sex life. I was jealous, but at the back of my mind, I knew I had a few more boundaries than she did. I took the job of sports editor almost a year ago. It was nice moving to a progressive online publication from the print-based conservative newspaper I had cut my teeth on.
"Team, thanks, bring it in." Jamie, our editor looked tired. He had taken off his glasses and was rubbing the bridge of his nose. We went around the table and explained the different articles we were working on. A few colleagues had dialled in from home which was more than acceptable, however, I preferred the trek into the office each day.
"Matty Andrews from the Reds has gone public about health issues with his youngest child on Instagram late last night. I was going to see if he and his wife might agree to a further interview." I contributed.
"Good work, Carolyn. Hope there will be something on the upcoming cricket test too! Hey, didn't your brother used to play for the Reds or something?
My brother. I sighed. I wondered how long I would be referred to as Andy Harrison's sister. Andy had been an amazing player over many years before retiring this season. He never received a suspension, won four Best and Fairest titles, married Suze, a stunning woman who has continued in her teaching job at a primary school in a disadvantaged area and produced four beautiful children. I had gotten my first gig as a sports reporter because I was Andy Harrison's sister.
Donna drawled on about some wife or girlfriend from one of the other football teams who was promoting a designer Christmas t-shirt to raise funds for the Children's Hospital. In this sports-mad city, I suppose it made sense to raise money by such means, but it always felt dirty to me, especially after Suze explained that so many WAGs did it only for an extra cut for themselves.
"Before we go, team," everyone groaned at Anton lengthening the meeting, "Secret Santas have been drawn and I'll hand you your envelope or email you your recipient over the next few days. Remember it's just a bit of fun. $20 limit, handmade is always awesome! Presents by Christmas Eve lunch please."
I sighed. Christmas was not my favourite time of year. The idea of playing happy families amidst chaos had lost its appeal many years ago.
"Carolyn," Jamie pulled me aside after the briefing, "Just find out if Donna's t-shirt thing is legit for me please."
"Gee, thanks, Boss. I'll ask Andy for you because no doubt he'll know."
"I wasn't thinking that! I thought you might use your investigative skills to sus it out, but if you want to use Andy..."
I never knew how to take Jamie. His marriage had ended over the previous year and his wife had taken his two children and moved north with her new partner knowing Jamie could not follow due to his job. Donna often reminded me to be nicer to him, but I did not know how to act around him most of the time, plus I didn't want to expose my desire for him.
Moving to this job straight after Christmas the year before I had only known Jamie as surly at best and found myself grateful that I had never been on the end of one of his temper tirades. It was such a shame as he was one of the sexiest men I had ever seen. I knew he was cricket-mad and had had a promising career in his teenage years before he decided to deviate into journalism. He was the epitome of tall, dark and handsome and until this year had had the ex-model as a wife and produced two beautiful children.
People had told me that Jamie had 'family money' which had helped him establish our online enterprise. I had been headhunted after Jamie had read a piece I had written in a newspaper that revealed a cheating scandal amongst two of the football sides who had been throwing games after placing large bets. I liked the ethos behind the organisation I now worked for and switching was, to me, a career advancement, even if my father did not believe it was real journalism as it was published online and not in a broadsheet, even though all of our local papers were now printed in tabloid format.
My father had been involved in junior football since before I was born. Andy, being the eldest, was encouraged to pursue a career in football after his skill was noticed from a young age. Whilst my mother had been a tennis player in her teenage years, she also had a fondness for music and encouraged me to learn the flute and take up ballet when I was growing up. This meant nothing to my father, who my mother jokingly referred to as a philistine, however when she died after her car was hit by a drunk driver when I was 15, any thoughts of careers in music or the theatre ended.
"Carolyn, your brother has not only made the State Under 17 team, but he is also the captain and I don't have time to run around after both of you on the weekends." He had told me when I informed him I had one of the lead parts in the school musical the year after Mum died.
I simply turned it down and became the dutiful daughter and sister following Andy around. Of course, I was always off-limits to his football mates, my father made sure they all knew that, so I was well and truly a virgin when I went to uni to study journalism. I had a couple of relationships with guys I studied with and some okay sexual experiences, but I was still living at home and Dad had made it clear I was never to bring a boy home and never to stay at his home either.
When I graduated and started my career as a cadet journalist, my dad tried to convince me to go out with one of Andy's teammates who had been caught with a small amount of pot on an end of season trip, telling me that the journalists would spin it that he was obviously a decent bloke because he was going out with Andy Harrison's virgin sister. I had to tell my dad I was not a virgin and he did not speak to me for some months.
Moving into a flat with a colleague was one of the best things I did. Nicki and I are still great friends, even though she now works only part-time having recently had her second child. In many ways, I was jealous of my friend. She met Enrico when she was covering a story and they were inseparable from that day onwards. I had never believed in love at first sight until I saw Nicki and Enrico's relationship blossom.
I can't say I've ever been in love. I've had a few boyfriends, but nothing overly serious. I've never been able to let my guard down I suppose. Most of my relationships started with sex and fizzled out when I realised that, not only did I have nothing in common with my partner, but the sex was not that fantastic either. At the back of my mind, I could still hear my father lecturing me as a teenager after Mum died, telling me that good girls did not have sex before they were married and if they did, they usually became pregnant, and no one liked an unmarried mother.
"Caz, Caz, Caz!" Anton had a huge grin on his face as he handed me a red envelope trimmed in green and white stripes with sprigs of holly in each corner, "I may have cheated a bit, but not only have I seen your doe eyes looking lustfully at Jamie for some months, he also needs to get laid, so I recommend you just give him a blowjob and consider Secret Santa delivered! No doubt Donna can give you some tips."
My mouth dropped and I was lost for words as Anton sauntered away from our desks having handed Donna her envelope too.
"Oh my God! Did he just actually say that? I mean, he can't... Fuck!" I thought I had hidden my desire for Jamie rather well. I mean, most of the women in the office looked at him with lustful eyes and why wouldn't they?
"Sprung girl!" Donna laughed as she opened her envelope, "Great, Crystal in IT. I'll get her a t-shirt or something."
"What on earth could I get for Jamie though? I mean, he's got everything!"
"Yeah, except for a woman! Anton's right- you two would be perfect together."
"But he's never going to look at me, I mean, his ex-wife was a model!"
"Girl, you've got curves hiding under those straight-legged pants and baggy blouses you wear! Anton's right too- Jamie really needs to get laid."
"Isn't that your specialty? I mean, you've done Anton, right?"
"Of course, honey, ages ago, but there was nothing to tempt me back for more. Same with Politics Paul!"
"So, I mean, all this sex, is it like, any good?"
'Honey, it's always great when it involves me! Seriously though girl, have you had sex since starting here?"
Donna loved talking about sex and I had held back, not wanting to admit I had issues.
"Of course." I sounded defensive, but I also hope I sounded convincing despite the lie.
"Caz, how old are you?"
"29, you know that."
"Isn't that too old to be lying to friends?"
