The Grove
All morning, Mary's thoughts kept drifting to Alvin and the story he had told her of Bonnie, of his love and of his loss. She had told him to take the day for himself, but she longed to reach out to him, to hear this voice and ask him if he was okay. He was good at doing his taciturn New England thing, but she could tell how much he still hurt, despite his attempts at maintaining a granite exterior. That frightened her, not because she thought he might do harm to himself or that he could not bear up under his pain, but because she was hesitantly admitting the strength of her feelings for him, and she feared he would not be able to open his wounded heart to her.
She felt the need to talk to someone, so she texted her friend Kelly and offered to treat her to lunch at the China Garden. Kelly immediately agreed.
As they munched on spring rolls, Mary told Kelly about her visit to Alvin's house, and their late night conversation.
"You told me, Kel, the first time we talked about him, that I was competing with a ghost. I see now what you meant."
Kelly shrugged, "Well, you do have some advantages in that contest, right? Being warm flesh and all."
Mary laughed at that, but spoke seriously. "I just wonder about what's bottled up inside, you know, when a guy tries to hold all those feelings in. And really, he's not that good at it. You can hear the emotion in his voice when he talks about her, or about his daughters."
Kelly nodded. "I remember at Bonnie's funeral..."
"You went to her funeral?"
"Sure. My mom worked with her at the hospital. Anyway, I remember Alvin sitting there, with Jen and Charlotte, and thinking, how does he not just break apart? And, then, with Bonnie's dad..."
"What happened with her dad?"
"He just totally lost it. Well, her mom had died like a year before, so there's that. But at the end of the service, when everyone was leaving the grave, he just broke down. Fell on his knees, just wailing."
"Oh, the poor man."
"And there was Alvin," Kelly continued, "went right to him and lifted him up and put his arms around him and held him. I remember that so clearly. Bonnie's dad with his head against Alvin's chest, just weeping his heart out, and Alvin holding him and comforting him. I thought, how does he do that? Hold his shit together like that? You could see how much he was hurting himself."
Mary looked down at the table. "Kelly, what I am afraid of is that the wall that holds that in is the same wall that will block me out."
Kelly thought for a minute, then shook her head. "You are missing the main point, Mary."
"What's that?"
"Do you think he ever sat up till the wee hours telling anyone else all about it? Talking about his feelings? Jeezum crow, I frickin' doubt it."
Mary was sure that Kelly was right, and took some solace from that. Her mood lightened as the day when on.
When she got home, she found an envelope tucked into the edge of her door. She opened it and took out a small card. The front was adorned with a colorful drawing of balloons and the words, "You are invited!" The message inside, filled in by a delicate hand that surely was not Alvin's, was an announcement of a "Summer Homecoming Party for Jennifer and Danielle", to be held on Saturday at Alvin's house, beginning at five o'clock.
She kicked off her shoes and plopped down on the couch. She looked at the card again. All day, she had thought about calling Alvin, despite her own suggestion that he take the day to focus on himself. But she really wanted to hear his voice, and wasn't it just polite to RSVP for the party? Without another thought, she dialed his number.
Alvin was lying flat on his back in the hold of Tom Woodward's sailboat when his phone rang. He was holding a flashlight in his mouth while he felt around a tangle of wires beneath the boat's instrument panel, trying to learn why it had lost power. He fished the phone from his pocket, saw that it was Mary and spit the flashlight out on to the floor.
"Hi, you busy?" Mary asked when he answered.
"Nope, just lying around."
"Oh, good. You must be tired, you didn't get much sleep last night."
"Oh, I'll be finishing up here in just a bit."
"The reason I called is that I got an invitation to a party Saturday."
"Well, it ain't no Hollywood soiree, just family and a few friends, having a cookout and such. Jen and her girl will be coming down from Orono for the summer. Just a little welcome home thing."
"I really appreciate that you thought to invite me."
"I will take some credit, but Jen made a point that she wanted to get a good look at you."
"You've been telling her about me."
"Not me. She's got spies, I think. I'm of an opinion that she talks to the birds and forest creatures. You had any crows looking in your windows? Right sneaky bastards, those crows."
"Stop it. You're trying to keep me from freaking out about meeting your family."
"Is that a bad thing?"
"Freaking out?"
"Trying to put a stop to it."
"No, of course not."
He crawled out from under the control board and sat up. "Listen, Mary. They'll like you because I like you."
"Charlotte will be there too?"
"Oh, you've got the whole gauntlet to run."
"I thought you were trying to reassure me."
"I'm just having a little fun with you. It will all be fine, don't worry."
"Should I bring anything?"
"If you brought something sweet, that might gain you a few points."
"Okay. Well, I'll see you Saturday."
"I'll look forward to it." He slipped his phone in his shirt pocket and pulled himself to his feet. He felt a twinge of pain in his back and smiled at the memory of the massage Mary had given him after he'd installed her air conditioner.
The sun was low in the west as Alvin climbed on to the wharf. He looked across the harbor. The trees on the far shore were aglow with the low angled light. A great flock of gulls flew overhead, returning to their island rookeries for the night. He checked in with Bobby, one of his part time summer helpers, and let him know he was going to head home. He was weary, having put in a long day after a short night's sleep. He didn't want to cook when he got home so he trudged up to the diner and asked Audrey to make him a cheeseburger and fries.
He was sitting at one of the picnic tables on the deck, sipping a Pepsi, when she brought out his food. She sat down across the table from him and took off her hairnet. Audrey had been running the Faulkner's Wharf Diner since Alvin was a kid. He thought of her more like an aunt than an employee.
"You look beat," she said to him as he bit into his burger.
"Didn't get much sleep last night."
"Out with your new girl, I suppose."
"Something like that."
"You think this one might be a keeper?"
"Might be," he shrugged.
Audrey stood up and stretched. "I can't make it Saturday, but I'll be glad to whip you up a plate of deviled eggs to take."
"Thank you, I'd like that."
She patted Alvin on the shoulder. "Lonesome sucks, dear," she told him, "Don't know why a body'd choose it."
Saturday was a gorgeous late June day. Mary drove out to Puddledock Road with all her windows open, enjoying the afternoon breeze and the smell of pines.
There were a half dozen cars parked in front of the house when she arrived. She got out, took a minute to straighten her dress, then reached in for the platter of cookies she had baked. It was her mother's special recipe, chocolate chip with coconut and macadamia nuts. As she approached the front door, she saw a dark haired boy sitting on the steps. She guessed that he was about eight years old.
"Hi," she said as she approached, "I'm Mary. What's your name?"
"Theo," he replied, "I came with my dad."
"What's your dad's name?"
"Timothy John Faulkner."
Mary resisted the urge to ask him his mother's name. "Nice to meet you Theo."
The boy was staring intently at her platter.
"Would you like a cookie?"
"Sure," he said. Mary held out the platter and he took one. "Thank you, Ma'am. Everybody is down to the grove."
"The grove? Where's that?"
He gestured to his left. "Around there and down the path. I'll show you."
Mary followed as he marched around the barn and along a weather beaten wooden fence. She looked over the pickets and realized with a start that it surrounded what had been Bonnie's garden.
They rounded the corner of the fence and walked down a well worn dirt path. A short way ahead of them, across a field of wild flowers, she saw a circle of tall pines, and within it she could see figures moving. She followed Theo into the cool shade under the trees and passed into a clearing, about fifty feet in diameter. A stone ringed fire pit sat in the center, surrounded by benches and an assortment of lawn chairs. To her right there was a grill, converted from an old oil drum, and a pair of picnic tables, laden with food and drinks.
She didn't see Alvin or Tim, and did not know anyone else, so she walked over to the picnic tables.
A woman was arranging food on a tray, and when she looked up, Mary knew who she was. There was no question she was cut from the same cloth as Alvin and Tim.
"You must be Mary," she said with a smile, "I'm Diana, Alvin's sister." She turned to a tall man standing by the grill, tending the coals. "This is my husband, Bob."
The man reached over and offered Mary his hand. "Bob Michaud, glad to meet you."
Mary put the platter of cookies down on the table and shook his hand.
"Alvin and Tim are over to the woodpile, getting ready to start the fire," Diana said, "They'll be right back. I see you met Theo."
"Yes, he was my guide. Very helpful."
Theo blushed and asked for another cookie. Mary looked at Diana. "You think it's okay?" she asked.
"Oh, hell yes," Diana replied, "We ain't that kind of family, dear, give the boy a cookie."
Theo took a cookie in each hand as Diana led Mary over to the other table and introduced her to her daughter Rachel, a pretty but shy sixteen year old.
"My boy, Andy, is in the Coast Guard. He's out your way, Sausalito, California."
"That's up by San Francisco."
Diana shrugged. "They could have stationed him in Rockland or Southwest Harbor but they sent him out to the west coast."
"Oh my god, you must be Mary," someone said in a loud voice. Mary turned around to see a young woman in jeans and a Maine Black Bears t-shirt striding toward her. Mary's first thought was that she looked remarkably like the picture of her mother that she had seen on the mantel.
"I'm Jennifer," she said, hugging Mary and kissing her cheek. "This is Danni."
