Chapter 5: Friday, July 15, 2016
I spent a very distracted morning behind a closed office door collecting paperwork and notes in preparation for a directors' meeting. I tried several times to get through to Dawn, but each call went to voicemail. I fought the urge to try more, lest she think I was as desperate to talk to her as I actually was. It was eleven o'clock Friday when Ell called through to my office.
"Mr. Richards, Ms. Vo would like a few minutes. Are you available?"
"Shit! She's here?" I muttered to myself as I closed the folder of papers I was reading, strode to my closed office door, and opened it. Dawn was standing next to Ellena's desk and appeared very agitated.
"I need a word with you in private. Can we talk in your office?" she asked.
I waved her in and closed the door. When I realized her seriousness wasn't a ruse as it had been the day before, I asked, "You okay?"
"I am so embarrassed, Will. Last night I enjoyed way too much of that awesome whiskey you brought, and I do stupid things when I'm drunk. I can't believe what I did, and I hope I haven't disgusted you or anything."
She was blushing and talking
very
fast. "I've never done anything like that, and I said and did some things and I'm afraid—" she continued rambling.
Luckily, the wood blinds in the window between my office and the anteroom were closed. I cupped Dawn's face in my palms and planted my open mouth right on her still-speaking lips. It quieted her. I traced her upper lip with the tip of my tongue. As it approached her center, she puckered against it and suckled it into her mouth, pushing the flat of her own tongue against it.
She tasted so unbelievably delicious. I was glad to be stone-cold sober so I could cement her flavor into my memory. We kissed softly for a few tender moments. I was careful not to smear her lipstick. I straightened myself because her much smaller frame meant kissing her while standing required a bit of a stoop. I held her body tightly to mine. The embrace felt right, and I also wanted her to feel what her kisses did to me.
I placed a hand gently against her back to hold her to my chest. Turning her head up to look at me, I kissed her again. I motioned toward the couch and Dawn took a seat. I twisted the handle on the blinds, opening the slats.
"Sorry, Dawn. I've gotta do this or Xena out there will come in here and do it herself."
It took me only a few seconds. I sat in one of the chairs opposite the couch.
"Dawn, I have to ask you a question. Did you mean what you said just before you closed your door last night?"
"You mean when I said I'm in love with you?"
I nodded.
"Good," she continued, "because that's the last thing I remember saying to you, and like I said, I was pretty toasted last night, and I wasn't sure if I'd done or said something else—"
I cut her off. "Dawn!"
That froze her for a few seconds, mouth agape.
"Yes. Yes, Will, I meant it, and though the utterance was definitely made easier by the alcohol, the sentiment was not induced by it at all. Please don't be upset with me or feel you have to say it back—"
"Devo!" I interrupted her again.
"Yes. I am most definitely in love with you."
Her words became focused and more organized.
"After I closed the door last night, I watched you through the peephole. You looked scared. Shocked. I don't want to damage our friendship, Will. I apologize if I have."
"You haven't," I assured her. "I wasn't scared. I was definitely stunned but I was also … euphoric? I can tell you that I've been head-over-heels in love with you for a long time, too," I responded quietly.
Her posture softened. Her eyes watered. She captured a tear with the pad of her thumb before it could smudge her makeup. She smiled back at me.
"Oh, thank god. Jeez, Will. I was pacing out there in the hall for probably fifteen minutes before I worked up the nerve to come in here. I can't tell you how relieved I am to hear what you just said.
"I swear. When I came out of the restroom last night at the hotel, I really thought you would be gone." She paused, staring out the windows into the tree line.
"When you weren't, I got
this close
to inviting you into my room," she said, making a small gap between her finger and thumb, "but I decided I was too drunk to be making wise choices."
She paused again, then continued, "Why have we wasted so much time? Imagine where we might be right now if I had just jumped you in Houston like I wanted to all those years ago."
I white-lied when I said, "I don't want to imagine," because I'd done exactly that, many, many times.
"Dawn, everything that's happened, as well as everything that hasn't, might have brought us to what …
finally
happened last night."
"Ugh. Speaking of which, what did you do with my … things?"
"Don't worry about it. But, jeez. I'm dying to know, Devo. Just how … turned on
were
you?"
"Do we really have to talk about that right now? Isn't that a little personal?"
"Yes, it's
very
personal, and you brought it up."
She sighed and cracked a slight smile.
"Will, I was turned on more than I have been in a very long time.
"When I touched your hand and brushed your leg with my foot … and, when you stroked my arm, and then I kissed you? Well. The first time I remember being so heated up was on a flight from Houston to Dallas when I was sitting next to someone to whom I had really, really,
really
taken a liking."
She stared at me as the realization of what she'd said dawned on my face. I couldn't suppress a smile.
"I'm going to be as straight up and honest with you as you just were with me. What you gave me last night was so intimate. So … usually
hidden. Personal. Private.
I looked at the pictures you took on my TV, and, well … I had to use a mop to clean up afterwards," I admitted to her, straight-faced.
"Seriously? I made you—"
I nodded, not taking my eyes off hers.
"Me, too. Except … I was in the shower."
It surprised me we'd both just admitted we'd masturbated to thoughts of each other.
She continued, "Will, I mean it. I do love you, and not just platonically."
"I love you, too, Devo."
I hoped my face reflected my honest reply. I let my words be heard before continuing.
"But here's the thing. I don't want that to be front and center. I mean, I