The drive home was anything but boring. Scenario after scenario rolled through my head. Greta Friedrich of all people. Never in a million years would I have thought of her in a romantic way. Hell, I couldn't even remember what she looked like other than a spitting image of her big sister. The last I remembered of her was a girl with an almost flat chest, no ass to speak of and tinsel teeth. (Braces) Hilda told me that I wouldn't be disappointed with what I saw so she must have developed nicely as she matured.
Gone for another two months, another wrench in the gears so to speak. How would I get to know her if I haven't met her as an adult? And what about those little girls? Are they ready for a hardnosed ex-Marine as a stepdad? Better yet. Was I ready for my life to be invaded by female everything from undies over the shower curtain to fancy smelling perfumes to nail polish, to who knows what women do these days. Drama at every turn, oncoming puberty? Raising teen daughters? How would I handle the first greasy haired, pimple faced perve that wanted to date one of my girls? Fuck, this wasn't coloring outside the lines, this was miles from my comfort zone.
Sleep was restless at best. My morning run was usually where I planned the rest of my day. Not this morning. My mind was still in a fog. Talking and being with Hilda was fun, but was I ready for the rest of what we talked about? I needed clarity. Being brave I decided to try the texting thing instead of calling Hilda. I had no idea what her schedule was and didn't want to interrupt with a phone call.
Me:
Morning Hilda. Say, about last night. I'm not so sure it would work. Maybe you shouldn't say anything to Greta.
I spent the greater part of that morning moving Gilbert and his shit out of the station. He mumbled and complained that he hadn't seen a dime from the sale. My thought was *tough shit, you were into the bank for thousands. What did you do with it? * The more he pissed and moaned the more irritated I became. I finally stopped his yammering and asked.
"How much would it take to shut your mouth and get the hell out of here?"
I sensed the little peckerhead had been hoping I might ask because without a moments hesitation he blurted. "Five grand."
My answer was just as rapid. "Fuck you Gilbert. A grand and you hit the trail cow patty. As in, right fucking now." Not knowing what fees and such I would encounter each day I had enough cash in the truck to cover a grand. I gave him an ultimatum, "I enough have cash on hand to cover that. Once it's in your hands I want you gone."
The stupid ass got cocky and demanded two grand. Wrong move. As I walked toward him he realized he had fucked up royally. With my nose three inches from his I let him know exactly where he stood.
"Listen, Shit Breath. I just changed my mind. I'll buy a bus ticket to wherever you want to go in the lower 48, I'll put two hundred bucks in your hand, and I never want to see you again. That's the offer, take it or get the hell off my property."
You know the saying, stupid is as stupid does. I'm convinced Gilbert was the role model for that quote. He almost spit in my face as he replied.
"When kin I git that ticket?"
I was fed up with his ignorance. "Right now Gilbert. Follow me to Clairemont, I'll buy the ticket and you're history. I'll put the money in your hand when you get on the bus and not a moment before."
Gilbert was ready. "There's a bus leaves at three. Always wanted to go south. I kin be packed and ready to catch that bus. Kin you meet me at the bus station by then? I gotta git the truck back to my buddy so I can't go right away."
I almost shouted, "I'll be there at two and your ass better be there as well. Now get the hell outta my store."
He grabbed the remainder of the six-pack he'd brought, popped a top and slammed at least half of it in one swig. I wondered if his buddy knew he was loaded while he drove. That thought left just as quickly as it had come. The dumpster was being dropped off as he drove away, and my phone started ringing. *What next* I thought. *Who the hell did I know that would be calling me at 10:45 in the morning?*
I gave it my normal I'm peeved answer, "Yeah. Who's this?"
I heard a laugh followed by, "Well good morning to you-to-you ornery cuss. What's the problem, put your underwear on backwards?"
I knew I should have been more polite but Gilbert had me pissed.
"Hi Hilda. Sorry. I just had it out with Gilbert. I'm putting him on a bus later today and hope to never see or hear from him again. Geez that man grinds my axe. What's up?"
Another laugh, "What's up? What the heck does that mean? You texted me. Remember?"
Under my breath I mumbled, "Oh shit, that's right." Then proceeded trying to dig myself out of the muck I'd waded into.
"Yeah. Sorry. Hey, maybe you should hold off telling your sister about me. It might not work and to be honest I'm not sure I can handle three women in the house at one time."
I heard her serious voice take over, "Robert. You still overthink everything. First, it's too late to not mention you to Greta. She's excited about the possibilities by the way. Second, you won't be inundated with 3 women at once. You'll have one woman who will fawn over and love you to no end. Along with that lady will be two little girls starved for love and affection from someone they trust. I can guarantee the first time they crawl on your lap and use that magic word, 'daddy' you'll be hooked."
I wasn't sure what to think. "Do you really think it could be like that? I mean, isn't that sort of a fairy tale?"
I loved her answer, "Doesn't have to be if you don't want it to. Kids want to be loved, warm, fed, treated properly, have a bike and a safe home. One more thing mister skeptical. She isn't returning for another two months. She has international text and long distance. Call or text her. Get the ball rolling and in the meantime, you can work yourself to exhaustion while you wait for their arrival."
"You make it sound simple and easy Hilda. I'm just not sure."
Her answer set me straight, "It isn't simple and easy Rob. Every marriage is what you make it to be. No outside force can do it for you. Show her love and respect, she'll do the same. I need to hang up Robbie boy, got a hip replacement to do in an hour."
I said, "Bye Hilda." And the line went dead.
My morning had transformed from a metaphorical drizzle to a downpour. There was no time to contemplate or ruminate all that had been said. I needed to get myself organized in a damn quick hurry, decide what was priority one after getting shitbird Gilbert on that damned bus and then execute my plan. The words of an old Gunnery Sgt. rang in my ears, *those who fail to plan, plan to fail*. Nope, that wasn't going to be me.