Firsts

Author's Note: Okay, here's Chapter 6, and be warned! The next one is the last, at least for now. Thanks to coloryourworld and warrior_wolf for editing, and to TangledinYou for distracting me when writer's block has me one step away from flinging my laptop out of the window. And a HUGE thanks to everyone who has posted comments, voted and sent me feedback. The lyrics are 'Dirty Little Secret' by All-American Rejects. Enjoy!

\*****/

Who has to know?

The way she feels inside,

Those thoughts I can't deny,

These sleeping dogs won't lie,

And now I try to lie.

It's eating me apart,

Trace this life back!

I'll keep you my dirty little secret…

\*****/

Gabriel was just drifting off, his hair still damp from his shower when his cell started ringing, jerking him towards consciousness. He was sorely tempted to ignore it, but it could be his Ma or something else important. Checking, he recognised the Ramirez's house number and frowned.

What could be so important that they'd call this late?

He flipped open the phone. "What's up?"

"It's me," Luis said from the other end. "Get over here. We have a problem," he said tightly. Gabriel could hear voices shouting in the background, but he couldn't make out what they were saying. Before he had a chance to ask what was going on, the line went dead; Luis had hung up.

He stared sightlessly at the phone in his hand, trying to figure out what could be wrong. It crossed his mind that the guys might have found out about he and Kes' little arrangement, but though Luis sounded pissed, his anger hadn't seemed directed at Gabriel.

Shaking his head, he snapped into action, pulling on jeans and an old t-shirt, shoving his feet into his boots as he grabbed the keys, and quickly making his way to his truck.

As he was driving the few blocks to her house, Gabriel began to worry that something had happened to Kes. She had only left around an hour ago, but that was plenty of time for something to have gone wrong. But if she was hurt, Luis would be calling from the hospital, right? So it had to be something else, but what?

Calmed by that bit of logic, Gabriel realised he was over the speed limit and quickly slowed down. He still made it there in record time. As he pulled up, he noticed a black Escalade parked in the drive.

When he passed it on his way to the door, he saw a tiny dark-haired woman huddled in the passenger seat. Her big, red-rimmed eyes snapped up and he gave her a polite nod, and was rewarded with a weak smile. She seemed vaguely familiar, but he couldn't place her.

Before he had a chance to ring the bell, the door was flung open and Tomas pulled him inside.

"Maybe you can talk some sense into them."

"What? Who? What's going on?" Gabriel asked, thoroughly confused.

"That," Tommy answered, nodding and pointing towards the couch.

Kes was standing in front of it almost defensively, facing off against her other two brothers who were glaring at her, their strong arms crossed over their chests. Gabriel had seen it a thousand times, he even did it himself – trying to look as big and strong as possible in order to get the other guy to back down.

Of course, it didn't work on Kes, she was more intimidating than the four of them combined, with her hands on her hips, her head tilted insolently and her eyes flashing. She shifted a little, and Gabriel saw who it was she was shielding.

Rico was sitting forward, his elbows on his knees and his head in his heads. Seeing Kes defending him like that, Gabriel was tempted to go stand next to he brothers, but he remembered how she reacted the last time he'd tried to 'save' Kes from Rico, and right know, the player wasn't looking himself.

His normal, laid-back, cocky expression was gone, instead his face was drawn, his eyes were surrounded by dark shadows and his clothes were rumpled like he'd dressed in a rush.

"Ortega," Gabriel greeted, his voice neither accepting nor angry.

"Demachi," he replied, his voice tired.

"Oh, I get it," Kes snarled at her brothers. "Calling in reinforcements, huh? Great. Just fucking great." Kes rarely swore in front of her brothers, she must be

pissed

.

"Just trying to make you see sense," Matt remarked calmly.

"Sense?! You don't even know what he wants! You promised to hear him out, Mateo!" she scolded.

"Yeah, that was before I knew who your 'friend' was.

He's

nothing but trouble. I want him out!" Matt ordered sternly.

"No!" Kes yelled back. "You're being a jackass!"

Matt's eyes narrowed, and Gabriel knew it would turn into an all-out sibling war if someone didn't distract them.

"Is this anything to do with the chick in the Escalade out front?" All eyes swivelled to him, then back to Rico.

"Melosa?" Kes asked, frowning slightly.

Rico nodded. "Her roommate ran off with two months' rent and anything else she could get. The landlord kicked her out tonight. Mel needs a place to stay 'till I can find her somewhere safe. I know it's a lot to ask—"

"You're damn right it is! You can't expect us to just open our door to some chick you just knocked up," Matt interrupted, shaking his head in disbelief.

Rico stood up, rubbing a head over the stubble of his shaved head. "Why do you people keep thinking the kid is mine?" he laughed, though there was a slight hysterical edge to it.

"It's not his, it's Felix's kid," Kes said quietly.

Matt winced visibly, but held firm. "That still doesn't make it our problem."

Kes stepped up to him, placing a hand gently on his folded arms. "Matt, it doesn't matter who the father is, or who's asking for help. Melosa needs somewhere to crash and I'm not going to turn her away. She can sleep in Aunt Marie's room, we moved most of her stuff to the attic years ago, it'll be perfect." She looked at him in silence for a moment, not staring him down, just waiting for his compassionate heart to win out.

After a moment, Matt closed his eyes and sighed. "Fine. She can stay. But only until he finds her somewhere else, okay?"

Kes grinned, standing on her tiptoes to give her eldest brother a peck on the cheek. "Thanks, Matty."

She left then, heading out to get Melosa from the car. Tomas and Luis followed her outside to help, as always taking Matt's lead. Gabriel stayed put, not sure he wanted to leave Matt and Rico in the same room together unsupervised.

"You find her somewhere soon. You may have gotten on my sister's good side somehow, but you sure as hell aren't on mine. If you bring any of your shit into this house or into my sister's life, nothing on earth will stop me from ripping your heart out, understand?" Matt said all this with complete calm. Deadly calm.

Rico watched the older man and nodded. "Kes is a good person, I don't want to screw her life up, trust me. It's how I feel with Mel. I know my life is fucked up, and normally I wouldn't let someone like her near it with a ten-foot pole, but I'm all she's got," he replied just as calmly, his voice almost sad. "I'll find someplace soon, I promise. 'Till then, I'll pay for anything she needs."

Matt nodded then stepped up to Rico, staring him in the eye. "One more thing. If you ever think you're going to be anything more than 'friends' with Kes, think again." This time, there was no question, just a statement of fact.

Rico's lips twitched. "Don't worry Ramirez. I'm already crystal clear on that point," he said, not looking at Gabriel. It would seem that Rico knew something about what was going on between Gabriel and Kes, and that he brother's weren't in on the secret.

Before Matt could ask Rico to elaborate, the front door crashed open and Kes came tumbling through, a large battered suitcase in her arms. She was followed by Tomas, who was, of course, laughing his ass off from behind the stack of boxes he was carrying.

Kes stood quickly, dusting imaginary dirt from her jeans. "Ahem. Whoops." At the three men's puzzled looks, she grinned sheepishly. "Door got stuck."

Matt just shook his head, muttering under his breath. Kes dragged the apparently heavy suitcase over to the stairs, silently shrugging off Gabriel's attempt to help. Tommy followed close behind, dumping this load of boxes next to it, then followed her back outside.

"C'mon, Gabe. You can help me get this shit upstairs," Matt called. Gabriel shrugged, picking up the boxes Tommy had dumped, figuring his night of sleep was ruined already. He never minded being called into their little dramas, it just reminded him of how close he was to them all, how much a part of their family he was.

Awkwardly pushing down the handle to Aunt Marie's room with his elbow, he pushed into the one room in the Ramirez house that no one had been inside in years. They only time he had been inside it before was when he had helped them move Marie's things to the attic after she had passed.

It hadn't been shut up so long because of sentimental feelings, the whole house was filled with memories of her. It was just that since it was a reasonably large house, and the four remaining Ramirez's already had their own rooms, they had no use for an extra bedroom. Especially one with faded floral wallpaper, a large four-poster that wouldn't come apart to fit through the door and an en-suite with leaky taps, even if it was a little on the large side.

Gabriel figured it would make a great nursery, not that any of them were having kids anytime soon. Well, Melosa was, but from the sounds of things, she wouldn't be staying long enough to

need

a nursery.

The room hadn't changed in the nearly seven years since he'd last been there. The curtains were a little more sun-bleached, the paper and white painted trim peeling a little more, and there was a musty smell of stale air that all rooms get when they're shut up, but he could still smell the lavender mothballs and the patchouli that had been the old woman's signature scent underneath.

He gently placed the boxes on the floor at the foot of the bed, figuring that the new occupant of the room would prefer to unpack herself. Matt followed suit while Gabriel opened the windows wide, letting the room air out, knowing they were to far from the lake to worry too much about mosquitoes.

Kes voice drifted up the stairs, getting stronger as she moved closer. "…must be so tired, I bet you want to lie down. I'll get you some fresh sheets, and I can give you the rest of the two-cent tour tomorrow. The room at the end of the hall is the bathroom; the door on the left is mine, if you need anything during the night. The others are my brother's. There's an en-suit attached to your room, but I don't think you'll want to use it 'till we get it cleaned out unless it's an emergency," Gabriel could just imagine her nose wrinkling, "do you still have morning sickness?"

The reply was so quiet, Gabriel couldn't hear it, even though Kes was almost at the door. Matt, having heard what Kes had said, was already pulling the musty sheets off the bed as Gabriel flung open the last of the large, slightly grimy stained-glass sash windows.

A small gasp behind the caught their attention, and the two men spun to see what was wrong. The young woman from before, Melosa, was staring at the room in wide-eyed wonder.

"What? Something wrong?" Matt asked frowning, obviously ready to dislike the girl if she said anything wrong.

She looked at them, blinking, as if it was the first time she had noticed them in the room. She was five-foot-nothing, with straight, light brown hair and big hazel-brown eyes. At first, she looked nearly nine months pregnant, but taking into account her small height and slim frame, Gabriel guessed it was more like six or seven.

"I, uh… No! It's just so big! My old apartment would fit in here!" she gasped, he voice light and breathy.

"Oh. Well," Matt began, the wind knocked out of his sails. "I'm Matt, Mateo, the oldest. This is Gabriel Demachi, he's a friend of ours." Gabriel nodded politely, his eyes flicking to Kes, who was watching her brother hawk-eyed, waiting for him to say something rude. "I guess you already met the others. This'll be your room, if there's anything you need, just ask." His tone was neither friendly nor unfriendly, just brisk, businesslike.

Kes frowned a little, but didn't say anything. Obviously, she was trying to be welcoming to the older woman, and Matt wasn't playing along. Melosa, while she didn't seem upset, was looking at Matt with an inscrutable expression on her face. As he passed by her, she gently grasped his arm and looked up into his face. "Thank you." He looked down at her a moment, the nodded, his blank expression unchanged as he continued out of the room.

"Well," Kes began, feeling a little awkward at her brother's cold reaction. "Uh… Like I said, you're probably beat, so I'll get you some sheets and we can talk more tomorrow." Brightening, she continued, "If any of my brothers, Matt included, bug you too much, just hit them over the head with a newspaper, it usually works for me."

Melosa gave her a weak smile, then walked over to the window, looking silently outside. Kes nodded at him to follow her, and once the door was closed, she turned to him and frowned. "I can't believe Matty's being so rude. He's

never

like this!"

"He's just trying to protect his family," Gabriel said, leaning against the bathroom doorframe as she began pulling sheets out of the small laundry cupboard.

She turned to him with a scowl. "You can't honestly think

she's

trouble?"

Gabriel shrugged. "She seemed okay to me, but Matt's just being careful. He'll soon realise she's no threat and be back to his normal self, don't worry."

Kes sighed and nodded, leaning over to pickup a pillowcase that had fallen on the white-tiled floor. Gabriel was transfixed as he watched the fabric of her jeans pull tight over her ass, knowing that she wasn't wearing any panties underneath. The memories of their time together, only a little over an hour ago, shot though him, warming his blood.

He closed the door behind him, making sure it locked, all without taking his eyes from her. He knew it was dangerous, her brothers were just downstairs, but he couldn't resist her, he couldn't resist touching her, if only for a second.

He wrapped his arms around her, feeling her jump in surprise before relaxing instinctually against him. "Gabriel…" she whispered, her voice almost scolding. Almost.

"It's okay, the door's locked," he soothed as he nuzzled her neck, smelling the cinnamon-sweetness that now reminded him of her wherever he was.

"Still…" she sighed, but her body was already greeting him, her head tilting to the side as she allowed him better access to her neck. "Mmm," she murmured as he captured her earlobe, nibbling gently. Her body was hot against his, his arms still wrapped around her. "Rebecca was here earlier," she said, almost without thought.

He stilled, his arms tightening against her. "What? What did she want?" He knew that Becca had a mean streak, and that she could cause all kinds of trouble if she set her mind to it.

"Nothing, really. It doesn't matter," she replied, shrugging casually. Gabriel didn't like the idea of Kes being alone with Becca. There wasn't anything that Gabriel had done that Kes wasn't aware of, nothing he was particularly ashamed of, but Becca had the talent of being able to twist things until they only vaguely resembled reality. He had been wondering more and more why he was ever with her in the first place.

He turned Kes around, tilting her chin up, wanting to see the truth in her eyes. She smiled at him warmly, her expression calm and unconcerned, but he couldn't suppress the feeling that there was more to it than that.

Before he could ask her more however, she stood on her tiptoes and kissed him softly, her body rubbing against him through the fabric of their clothes. All thoughts of their conversation were wiped from his mind as her tongue pushed lightly against his, teasing him gently. He could drown in a kiss like that. Before he was ready, she pulled back.

"We should stop, someone'll look for us soon."

"Mmm-hmm," he agreed, capturing her lips and deepening the kiss, burying his hands in her silky hair and tipping her head to just the right angle. Her hands were grasping his waist, her fingers tangled in the fabric of his worn t-shirt. The world disappeared for a few minutes as they stood there, caught up in their own world.

It was nice to just kiss someone, without it being foreplay to sex. Both of them knew nothing was going to happen tonight, but they still wanted the brief contact. It had been a long time since Gabriel had that with anyone, probably since she had first asked him to kiss her almost three years ago.

He wondered at the difference in his relationship with Kes, wondered at the difference in

himself

. He was usually just interested in losing a few hours, tangled in unfamiliar bed sheets, but he found himself enjoying all the time he spent with Kes, even the innocent hours of just being her friend, of hearing her laugh and watching different emotions flicker through her warm brown eyes. He could just sit and watch her forever.

Then it hit him, and he pulled back, his eyes searching hers for some hint of matching realisation, but she was gazing up at him, her eyes slightly dazed, but watching him with the same good-natured warmth as always. Her tongue darted over her flushed lips, and he tracked the movement hungrily, but restrained himself, needing some time to think over what he had just figured out.

He pulled back, running a hand shakily through his hair. "You're right. I'd better go. I'll uhh… I'll see if I can drop by tomorrow, see if I can do anything to help Melosa settle in."

With that, he turned and left, trying to forget the confused expression on her face at his sudden departure. He was shaken to the core. That had never happened to him before. 'Course, since he had started whatever his bizarre relationship was with Kes, a lot of new things had happened.

He was blowing off perfectly good offers from more than willing girls. He was late for work. He was lying to his best friends.

He was in love.

\*****/

Unfortunately, Gabriel didn't get a chance to see any of the Ramirez brood for a couple days, as he was rushed off his feet at work, and both Luis and Tommy had taken the week off in honour of Kes and Tommy's birthday on the weekend. Their big plan had been to go somewhere nice for the week, but no one had thought to tell

her

that, and she hadn't been able to get the time off at such sort notice.

Instead, they, along with some of her friends, were going to go to the beach for the day, sunbathe and barbeque, maybe take a couple boats out onto Lake Michigan. Presumably, Melosa would be coming too, but Gabriel didn't know how that whole situation was going.

Gabriel, in all honesty, was glad that he hadn't had a chance to see Kes, it gave him time to think. He needed to figure out what he was going to do. He knew that most people thought he was just a serial womaniser, but something he'd never admitted, not even to Luis, was that he

wanted

a family, he

wanted

kids, not right now, maybe; but someday. He always figured he was just passing the time 'till he met his perfect woman. He never thought his perfect woman would be little Kes Ramirez.

The idea of being with her didn't scare him, it was the consequences that did. Her brothers would kill him. And if it didn't work out, if it ended badly, he'd lose not only

her,

but his three best friends, too. Things would never be the same. And all that was assuming she felt the same way about

him

, which he wasn't sure she did.