Author's Note: this story started out as a collaboration with JasonClearwater, taking Lucy, a character from his
Jesse and Will story series
and having her meet up with Alex, one of my characters.
For those readers familiar with my Literotica world, Alex's story loosely takes up from the end of my Memory and Loss series (which is auto-biographical), could run in parallel with my Sisters series, and would sit before the Rope and Veil series. This new encounter is completely fictional for Alex and is a "might have been" encounter.
For Jason, on the other hand, Jesse and Lucy's break-up contained too many of his own auto-biographical details, and he found that writing Lucy meeting another man was, to use his words, "Like hitting myself in the face with a baseball bat." He decided that he couldn't keep writing. Which is, I hope, testament to the depth and intensity of the story you are about to read. Jason has graciously allowed me to continue with his character Lucy, "I know you and Alex will look after her." I think we do.
It will be interesting to see if readers can spot where the collaborative writing ended, and where I took over the writing completely - this is a "writer's curiosity" for both Jason and myself.
Alex Meets Lucy
Lucy stood in an alleyway that smelt like piss and mud, in front of her ex-boyfriend Jesse. His long hair was matted with sweat, his eyes blacked out from whatever shit he'd taken.
Further down the alleyway, Jesse's best mate and gay lover, Will, dragged on a cigarette, watching the drama with cold blue eyes.
"I told you I'd stop!" Jesse said desperately. "I told you to tell me what you wanted, and I'd do it!"
Lucy shook her head, tears trickling down her face. "It's not about what I want, Jesse. It's about what you want. And that's not me, is it?"
Jesse's eyes were full of hurt. "So you what, you fucked his mates whenever he took me somewhere else? And then you just happened to fall in love with Lyle?"
Lucy dropped her head, her eyes squeezed shut. "He's straight, Jess. He just wants
me.
"
And you're so bent right now, I can hardly look at you.
"No one can be happy with just oneโ" Jesse started, and Lucy knew what he was going to say.
"No!" Her eyes flew open, blue and enraged. "That's what he wants you to believe! That one person's never enough! Being bi doesn't mean you get to have one of each! Where will trying to live like that leave you? Look at yourself, Jesse, you can't deal with jealousy! You can't
share
. It's not who you are. And... there can't be one rule for you, and one rule for everyone else."
She wrapped her arms across her chest and broke into heaving sobs as the pain opened up inside her. A year she'd spent with Jesse before Will had, slowly but surely, fucked him into a complete fucking mess.
"I loved youโso much." She turned her back, bending over her pain. She wanted to throw up.
Jesse put a hand against her back and she flinched under his familiar touch.
"So tell Lyle to fuck off," he said gently. "Come home with me."
His voice held pleading, but more than that, she could hear how much he wanted her back. His love for her had never faltered; she knew that, even though his confusion around who and what he was, was spiralling madly out of control.
She turned back to him, choking on what she needed to say.
"No, Jesse. You do what you need to do. Go find yourself." She pulled back a sob. "But be careful of him," she said, flecks of saliva coating her lips as she pointed at Will. "Because he's fucking poisonous."
"Luce..."
Jesse reached for her, but she stumbled away from him down the alley, and found her way back to the dense heat of the club, her eyes blurred with tears, her mind churning.
Fucking Will.
Until two months ago, Lucy'd had a sweet, attentive boyfriend in Jesse, a boyfriend who'd adored her. And yeah, maybe he wore eyeliner and kept his hair long, and yeah, maybe he dressed like he could front Tokio Hotel, and
yeah
, maybe the signs
were
all there.
Fuck you, Mum.
But if someone had told her that her boyfriend's best mate would turn her Jesse into what he was nowโa strung out, gender-confused cheat, in love with his gay best mate who'd effectively made him his bitch, she'd have laughed. Then punched them out. And properly too. None of this girly hair-pulling shit.
She caught sight of her new boyfriend, Lyle, standing at the bar. In a fucking
suit